Sell or stay? WWYD?

[VictorBaucherOrSomething]

Hi looking for advice on what to do in our situation. I'm a terrible one for fence sitting and dont know what to do for the best. DH is unsure too.

For background:

We live in a long row of mid terraces which are elevated from the road (maybe about 20 steps) and there is no off street parking. Threre is a lane behind the garden which gives more level access out to the street behind. The parking is a pain as sometimes there are inconsiderate practices from visitors etc such as parking across two spaces. Can't park in the street behind off the lane as the parking is even worse there. We have a 12 year old DD and 8 year old DS who are sharing a room, we are in a 2 up 2 down and no dining room to make into an extra bedroom. I'm a full time student, have two more years of my training to go.

What our thoughts on our situation are:

Option 1. Move house to a three bed, which has a dining room and proper hallway plus driveway, level access. We can afford this but means a lot less money for days out, holidays etc. As I'm a student we are limited in our borrowing, inheritances are mostly making up our house budget. We are moving away from a street where DS has a lot of friends about and they are always in and out of the differnt houses which I think I would miss. The houses we can afford which are bigger are about a mile away and across the other side of the town centre so would need to drive DD to see friends until he's older.

Option 2. Wait two years or so to move, until I graduate and am earning more, and we have more spare cash. it would mean giving DS our room and we would sleep in the living room on the mattress which would be stored in the big cupboard off the kitchen. Would keep our things in the biggest bedroom as nowhere else for them. We could convert the loft but as it wouldn't be classed as a third bedroom, we wouldn't get even half the money back when we come to sell so reluctant to do this.

Option 3. Stay put, pay off mortgage, convert loft to create an extra bedroom. Inheritance money easily enables this plus leaves money left over to allow us to to go on at least three holidays a year until the kids are late teens.

I would love to go for option 3 but always feel a bit held back due to the house elevation and parking - the things we can't change! If you were me, what would you do?

ps probably worth saying that while the stairs are annoying, the parking really grinds my gears and I get easily wound up by it at least once a week.

Hi @VictorBaucherOrSomething I'd 100% go with option 3, there will always be a compromise with whatever house you buy unless you have an unlimited budget but the compromise for option 3 sounds like the least impactful and will eventually get you your money back.
It could also be better the compromise you know as you could move to a bigger house and find that your new neighbours have foibles far worse than being inconsiderate parkers!

Thanks for your reply @SollaSollew , I know this option would mean less financial worry and give us great memories as a family. My worry is that we come to think, after our mortgage is paid off, that we have made a mistake and we have then lost our very low interest rate (would be porting current mortgage).

I also like option 3. I have lived with parking rage and actually it was a factor in us moving - but we found that with the new house we just had different stressors rather than parking! I think that financial stress in the long run would be much worse.

Option 1. Definitely.

Would you consider a different area altogether?

Also - we moved away from the parking issue, but we also moved away from the area where DC had friends and everyone was in and out of everyone's houses, and I don't think I've ever regretted anything more than losing that.

@TheBeesKnee we would stay in the area for the schools so definitely wouldn't move away.

@Nandocushion while the kids at times frustrate me I really will miss them being there if we do move. DCs will be at the same schools so will still have contact with most of the kids we move away from.

Option 1. Especially as it would get a lot easier financially once you’ve finished your studies. Also long term, the extra room will
be invaluable, parking problems solved and no extra stairs for your dotage.
Don’t underestimate how demoralising it is to sleep in the family sitting room or to do a ‘bad’ conversion.

Hi @VictorBaucherOrSomething . The eternal question with all decision making is 'what if...' isn't it! I am not a risk averse person so not sure if I am the best person to give advice but my philosophy has always been that you can only make decisions based on what you know now. Interest rates may have come down by the time your mortgage is paid off or you might decide that you need to move to a new area when you finish your studies or your children's friends in the street might move away or your daughter might make a different friendship group in the future and need you to drive her to see them closer to where you'd buy another house. My (longwinded point is) that you can't second guess so much what will happen in the future that it comes at the expense of making the most of your life now. So if you think option 3 on balance is the best decision you can make based on what you do know then I'd go for it.
Again disclaimer, that this is my thinking only not saying that's the right way of thinking of it for you.

Option 3 will get my vote

Option 1, without any doubt.

Reasons being:

• Option 2 immediate NO. It would be awful. Do not underestimate just how awful it is having to set up and pack away a bed daily. We did it once for a fortnight when we had family stay with us and I would have happily set that bloody mattress on fire by the end of it - and that was just 2 weeks!
• Your ds is 8. He's not all that far off Secondary age and the in/out of friends houses will likely change anyway. Ime the closest friends they have at 8 are not the same 3 or 4 years later...it's not a reason to stay.
• You will ALL benefit from a house move immediately. The kids get their own space, you keep yours. More space downstairs which only gets more valuable the bigger they get. Spare money can work its way back over time when you're no longer a student.
• Parking frustrations will only get worse as you have two teens that want lifts everywhere and eventually, possibly teens or young adults with their own cars! This problem won't change unless you move and will get worse the older they get.
• No one's getting any younger 🤷🏻‍♀️ Living on a flat plot is always sensible for the long term!

Thank you all for the input. @Alphabet1spaghetti2 things will be tight for sure for a couple of years but will be better once I get my first job after graduating, so yes it's not forever which I need to bear in mind.
@SollaSollew I'm getting better at taking risks the older I get and this move is a risk I guess but you're right that things can change quickly and the unforeseen happens.
@FruitPastilleNut you speak a lot of sense, the thought of our own rooms plus extra space on top of that is the dream. A proper open hallway instead of one which is just an enclosed staircase is an even better dream!

I would do a hybrid approach, I would suck with how you have it now. Wait till you have a job a after graduation, keep yourselves in your bedroom and move in 2 years time. The cost of materials may mean it’s not worth converting the loft to a bedroom but you could really clean it up (yes I’m projecting my own cobweb ridden loft on to the image of your house) and store more up there to do a minimal approach to living in a smaller space

I'd move ASAP, your 12yo dd will surely be wanting the privacy? I'd not sleep on a put me up for all the tea in China.

As your dc get more homework etc they'll want a room each to study. The days of being in and out of neighbours houses will soon be over as they are in comp.

Future proof for when you've 3 cars in the house and your knees are knackered.

I would rule out option 2 completely, many children were brought up sharing rooms as I did, nothing wrong with that.
Wait the 2 years then reconsider.

Option 1

I’d say it is worth checking what the value of your current house would be with a third bedroom - it might be worth investing in a conversion if the numbers stack up (extra bedroom usually adds quite a bit on the value on a property) and then sell up in a few years time when you’d have more equity and it will be more financially comfortable. So option 3 helps you to option 1, if that makes sense. But you’d need to closely look at the house prices in your area and the difference in prices for similar 3 beds versus the current 2 bed set up (and if it is also worth the hassle of having a big job done).

also worth considering if you can partition the children’s bedroom with a stud wall to give you a bit more time in the property as is? I agree with others that the kids sharing is def better than you and your husband sleeping downstairs for a couple of years on a pull out bed (that way madness lies…)

option 1 sounds good in theory, but with the cost of living at the moment, depends on really how tight things are financially with a bigger mortgage and how higher rates may affect you.

We've already talked to local builders and EAs about the conversion situation and it looks like it's something we can never get our full money back on were we to sell any time soon after having the work done.

The mortgage itself will only be about £60 a month more (60:% deposit and porting a 1.19% interest rate which is fixed for 4 more years) but of course there's higher CT, energy bills etc.

@VictorBaucherOrSomething for two years you may be able to lose something from your household budget to cover the extra in mortgage and council tax. Other bills will likely stay similar to current - if you don’t allow the heating to be on too much and they all learn to switch off lights and shut doors to keep costs down.
Missing a holiday or two for two years won’t kill anyone and yet will benefit everyone immensely with option 1. I do get that you want everything for the children today, but sometimes you need to think about the future - theirs but also yours.
Have just done 8 weeks sleeping on an air bed - I could happily puncture the bloody thing.
Space for cats and even the option of an electric car point.
A house with space to breathe, and will increase in value.
A house that will adapt when you get older and the grown up kids bring home bf/gf etc.
Definitely option 1. By the time you sold and bought another 6 months will have passed
so really only 18 months maybe less if struggling.

I appreciate the value of good neighbourhood, but a mile or so away is nothing! Especially if you can get a driveway and a third bedroom. I would go for option 1.

I was 'option 1' from the start, but with your latest update, even more so.

how much are you needing to borrow (because any extra won't be at the same interest rate!) or is the extra all being paid with inheritance money (glad you have the money, sorry for the reason 💐)

Driveway parking makes such a huge difference to your daily life! Kids having their own rooms and YOU two having a bedroom. if you've never had to make up a bed each night, do NOT underestimate how horrible it is!

just generally more space in the house. Hallway/dining room & usually bigger rooms too.

a mile isn't far, he can go home from school with them, they can come home with him. Weekend sleep overs. Walk from new house to theirs, it's only a mile, within a few months he'll be able to do it himself! (He'll be 10 by then.

plus he may have friends in the new street.

that's what I'd do anyway.

@TooMuchToDoTooLittleInclination we would only need to borrow a very small amount on top of what we're porting to get what we want in the new house. About 20k or so?

Personally I'd pick option 1 or 2. When we were buying our house I immediately discounted houses with outside stairs. When you've got a sleeping baby or a mardy toddler the last thing you want to deal with is navigating stairs and a pushchair.
Conversation to a 3 bed opens your market to families the stairs limits the price extremely @VictorBaucherOrSomething