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Original poster

Size or location?

29 replies

Choppies · 31/07/2022 21:24

Due to cladding issues I am currently stuck with a baby in a tiny flat and am faced with the block being wrapped in scaffolding with no insulation for a year unable to sell…..

so me and DP are ploughing all our cash into buying a house to move to - obviously as it will be a second home the stamp duty is extortionate and we have a very limited budget and will need to compromise.

so if you have a young child (or 2), would you go for a detached 3 bed with garden and quiet streets (but basically zero amenities in walking distance, or a smaller 3 bed townhouse new build at a lower spec with smaller drive/garden and no garage but closer to cafes and shops??

so far all I know is that living in this flat in the freezing cold with limited daylight for months on end is the compromise I can’t make.

wise mumsnetters please help me with wise words

OP posts:
MoHunter · 31/07/2022 21:28

Are they the same price wise? Personally I'd go for the detached - townhouses usually harder to sell on and have a more awkward layout. Also a larger garden is great for small children.

pilates · 31/07/2022 21:28

Option 1

Original poster
Choppies · 31/07/2022 21:33

Yeah I am leaning toward the less well connected location but detached. All about the same price point.

it’s just going to be a huge transition to move to a housing estate from a city centre!

It’s just really hard to make all these compromises, I feel like me and DP work so hard and now I’m faced with 6 months of getting a half hourly 35 minute bus to work while I save for an old banger to drive to work :( if I could sell the flat I could get something big enough in a slightly more happening area. But I know it’s what I need to do for better schools and space to play.

OP posts:
riotlady · 31/07/2022 21:34

Can you drive? And what are the schools like? If the answers are yes and good, I’d go for the first option. How often do you actually walk to a cafe anyway?

Original poster
Choppies · 31/07/2022 21:41

I can drive (we have one car but would need a second asap as both have to drive to work realistically as will need car seats for drop off and pick-up). The schools are better in the large housing estate.

@riotlady the thing is on mat leave I’ve been walking into town for baby groups/coffee/free museum play basically every day as didn’t have a car and it’s all on the doorstep, or if get a train somewhere for the day with the pram. But I think you’re right and realistically now I’m back at work those will be once a week max and therefore less important for life.

i grew up on a housing development and it was fine to be fair - but it’s a big shift mentally after 10 years of city living and public transport! Thank you all for your input

OP posts:
parietal · 31/07/2022 22:36

i'd go for the townhouse near cafe & shops. being within walking distance to shops & community makes a big difference to people's quality of life. And it means that when your child is an older primary / young teen, she will be able to walk to a friends house or go for playdate without you having to be 'parent-taxi' and driver her everywhere.

but also look at primary schools. if one location is in a better catchment, i'd go for that.

vera16 · 01/08/2022 02:55

In three years you will be obsessed with school catchments so I would do the research now on which school you want to go for and move into the catchment area. I would make some sacrifices on size to be nearer to town but it's a very personal decision with lots of factors to weigh up.

Original poster
Choppies · 02/08/2022 20:12

Schools are good in either. One good and one outstanding near each house. Just all so tricky. As budget is so constrained it seems weird to move to a 3 bed I already know will be too small in 5 years (although good scope to extend to decent 4 bed with kitchen-diner) if I could sell the flat in a couple of years. Whereas the town houses are maybe a bit fur-coat no knickers and actually you will never be able to solve the storage or parking issues?

Whats more important? Kids sharing a room or better garden/parking.

Not planning on being in either house after primary.

OP posts:
Flockameanie · 02/08/2022 20:17

Neither sounds ideal, but I’d always go for location. ((Having done the opposite before - great house in crap village - and instantly regretted it and ended up moving again very soon).

Also don’t underestimate the ‘culture shock’ of going from city centre living to having to drive everywhere. We made that move and I found it horribly isolating not being able to get places under my own steam.

pimlicoanna · 02/08/2022 20:25

Option 2 all day long.

Cotswoldmama · 02/08/2022 20:27

I'd go for option 2. In fact I did! I love being able to walk less than 5 minutes to be in town. For me it's location.

LittleGreyFluffyCat · 02/08/2022 20:31

I'd go for option 2.

I've always lived in towns, when kids were at primary we wanted to upsize. We nearly moved to a village, made an offer, had the survey. Then we suddenly realised we couldn't do it. So we found a house in the town. Best decision ever. I'd hate to have to drive everywhere and wait for buses.

dottypencilcase · 02/08/2022 21:38

As a parent of preschoolers (who doesn't drive), definitely option 2.

Potatomashed · 02/08/2022 21:41

Option 2. Sounds like your lifestyle will be compromised by option 1 and that’s not something I’d be willing to do (I’m all about the fun I squeeze in now I have kids!)

notanicepersonapparently · 02/08/2022 21:55

I moved from a townhouse to the detached country house. Downsides of the townhouse are neighbour noise when trying to get kids to sleep. Parking. All those bloody stairs and trying to keep an eye on the kids on a different floor. Plus side are the ones you mentioned particularly easy walk to shops and activities.
I never regretted moving to the country. Kids loved being out in the garden and played happily for hours It was hard to get them to come in! Downside was the travelling as some of them stayed in their old schools.

Original poster
Choppies · 03/08/2022 07:21

Thanks very much everyone - has been great to hear some views and has really given me stuff to focus on!

OP posts:
emmathedilemma · 03/08/2022 09:08

To be completely honest, neither! I couldn't live with having to drive to any amenities and a townhouse probably isn't great with young children unless it's got a good layout. They also tend to have very little scope for expansion or reconfiguring layouts.

Pocketrocket777 · 03/08/2022 09:13

Since you’ll be letting out your flat anyway, can you wait a year and rent for a year in the meantime somewhere you really want to live? (Central, etc). That way you don’t need the huge garden etc, just the things that you’ll really appreciate for a year. Daylight, outside space, walkable to all the stuff you like.

No idea if that’s good financial advice in the current climate, but if you can afford better once you sell your flat, it might be worth considering?

newrubylane · 03/08/2022 09:15

Depends how small the townhouse garden is, and whether there are parks close by. Also, what's the layout like - if your kitchen and living space are on separate floors then that could be a pain while you LO is tiny.

felulageller · 03/08/2022 10:07

Amenities esp as you have no car ATM

If you dont like it you can always move again.

senua · 03/08/2022 10:08

Since you’ll be letting out your flat anyway ...
Will she? This all started because "living in this flat in the freezing cold with limited daylight for months on end is the compromise I can’t make". Who else will make that compromise? The only option is to make the rent so low enticing that it probably doesn't actually make the project financially viable or worth the hassle.
You'd be better off taking the long term view: suck it up, save like mad and, in a year's time, sell the flat and get a better house (better than the current make-do options).

stormelf · 03/08/2022 11:23

I would go for option 2. Every day I am thankful that we moved to a village with amenities in walking distance and went for a terrace house over the nicer houses in less connected villages. With young children it has been great being able to walk to the shops or pop out for a coffee with them. I wouldn't want to be reliant on a car for everything. If you are only planning on staying in either house for the primary years then bedroom sharing shouldn't be an issue at all.

Original poster
Choppies · 03/08/2022 18:46

Sucking it up really isn’t an option - there’s zero parking options here and I need a car for nursery pick ups and to get to work - don’t work centrally and zero WFH options in my industry :( but really those saying suck it up are correct that all options are big compromises.

renting a house is totally unaffordable anywhere reasonable anywhere more desirable around here unfortunately

I think I’m leaning towards the better house in the worse location - the primary school is walking distance, as it the local Tesco express. I just don’t think a townhouse is worth it - especially as I’m only talking about a suburb with a parade of shops type facilities rather than staying city Center. I am just so frustrated at the cladding issues dictating my life

thanks for everyone’s opinions

OP posts:
glowinglantern · 03/08/2022 19:13

It’s really personal, I’d go for option 2 but I know that DH would go for option 1. There are good arguments both ways!

Blondeshavemorefun · 03/08/2022 19:29

After watching location x3 for years it’s all about location

so smaller but walkable stuff

Tho you say you will move again so it’s not your for ever home

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