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Original poster

It’s a neighbour one

68 replies

Trainfromredhill · 19/07/2022 08:37

Just got the keys to our new house. It’s got a large garden, the top 2/3 of which slope, the bottom 1/3 is flat- perfect for football. Hedge/trees around garden are all at least 9 feet high except for one side at the bottom 1/3 which is 4 feet. Neighbours garden on that side is about 2 feet higher than ours and is where they have their patio, which they appear to spend a lot of time on. When we viewed it I thought it was really odd that the hedge was so low and said to DH ‘the first thing we’ll do is grow that hedge’ (it’s our hedge). Met the neighbour this week - over the hedge. During the course of the conversation I said ‘I apologise if footballs end up in your garden’. To which he replied ‘I don’t mind sending the odd one back, but it’s not a game’. He then went on to tell us that he and the previous owners agreed to keep the hedge low because we both benefit from a better view! He definitely benefits from a better view across our garden and to the fields beyond, but we only ‘benefit’ from a view into his garden and total loss of privacy into ours. I was showing a friend around yesterday and didn’t even want to go to the bottom 1/3 because he was sitting out with his family. He could benefit from the same view if he moved his furniture to the bottom of his garden. Another neighbour has told us he is ‘worth knowing’. If we grow the hedge it’s obviously going to annoy him. But, aside from the privacy, I don’t think he can complain about footballs, but not want the hedge that would stop them. I’m inclined just to let the hedge grow. WWYD?

OP posts:

Original poster

Trainfromredhill · 13/10/2022 07:53

@Rollercoaster1920 the wall marks the boundary and is ours. His property starts on the other side of the wall.
I’ll check out the hornbeam plant you mention - thank you.

OP posts:

ScaredSceptic · 13/10/2022 09:39

BeanStew22 · 13/10/2022 00:31

^ check this, I think it refers to buildings not patios

Re the balcony: if reported and permission denied he may be required to remove it , ie an empty threat.

I would just build a fence - check if you can make it 10 ft so it’s 6 from his side

Show quote history

No, it's not about buildings. It's about installing any raised platform, such as an area of decking that is higher than 30cm.

Rollercoaster1920 · 13/10/2022 10:40

Landscaping is not a raised platform though. You can level a garden, which on sloping ground can mean some interesting height differences between neighbours. No planning required.

ScaredSceptic · 13/10/2022 12:34

Rollercoaster1920 · 13/10/2022 10:40

Landscaping is not a raised platform though. You can level a garden, which on sloping ground can mean some interesting height differences between neighbours. No planning required.

Yes I know. Which is why I specifically asked the OP if the neighbour had built a raised patio or decking area.

starfishmummy · 13/10/2022 13:02

A 2m fence or garden wall with pleached hornbeam growing above it is legal and provides privacy.

Not necessarily. There's a covenant here and we can only have fences to a certain height. I can't remember of it is 5ft ot 5ft6in but it's definitely not 6. Although a 5ft with trees would probably be OK.

JaNaJanice · 19/10/2022 09:03

This reply has been deleted

This has been deleted by MNHQ for breaking our Talk Guidelines.

HMSSophia · 19/10/2022 09:17

If he's a bullying type, don't fight back. Come the day, you will have a far far stronger case to eg police, if your side of things shows you are moderate, constructive and reasonable. That way, any harassment from him looks all the worse. If eg police, LA, can think "tit for tat, both as bad..." it's bad for you. You need this situation to be clearly seen as one bad neighbour, not a neighbour dispute.

Keep detailed records. Take photos. Grow a hedge. Google his background. But don't engage in a war. Is my advice.

ivykaty44 · 19/10/2022 09:21

I’d put a golf screen up, keeps the view & no footballs in the garden

put the screen your side of the hedge, then if he doesn’t want the hedge to grow…..😉

Motnight · 19/10/2022 09:23

I hope that you won't be back here in a year's time Op saying that your neighbour has cut your hedge down...

Sheenqueen · 20/10/2022 04:37

Sounds like you’re in for a miserable time. Neighbour disputes can ruin your enjoyment of your property.

Sheenqueen · 20/10/2022 04:46

6poundshower · 12/10/2022 17:03

He's a bully. Clearly someone used to getting his way by being aggressive and probably used to others capitulation in the face of his aggression. Each time that happens it will have made him more confident this approach will work.

Don't give him ammunition so be careful, however, you're within your rights obviously, to put a trampoline in your own garden, wherever you choose to put it. He doesn't get to decide.

I would

Record everything
Install the cctv for your own protection
As a pp said, contact a solicitor and know exactly where you stand (you don't have to write back to him, however he's probably not used to people standing up to him and may work better if you do. As with any bully)
Do some research into who he is and if necessary
Could you ask to speak to police on an informal basis, describe what you have here and say you feel harassed so it's on record for if/ when he escalates this
Describe the same to the council if he works with them, so they know how he is conducting himself. Potentially in a public office I.e. knowing he has their authority as backing
If he does the balcony (and he probably won't) start reporting it re: planning permission at the first sign he's doing it. He may get tied in knots by others and his focus gets taken away from you. And you may wish to highlight anything else in his property that doesn't have planning permission
Throw some garden parties (within reasonable hours, of course). This is what your garden is for after all. Make sure they're logged on your cctv so he can't accuse you of anything
The kids may find they are uncontrollably loud in the garden from now on. Again within reasonable times and bounds. Again, it's your garden and the cctv will show they're just kids playing

Have fun OP, and good luck!

Presumably OP has other neighbours? All this antagonistic behaviour will consume the OP’s life.

Sounds like an exhausting way to carry on. Surely there are ways to be assertive with compromise without creating a miserable existence with neighbours.

It sounds draining. That’s why my next house will be a detached one far away from neighbours.

Turangawaewae · 20/10/2022 06:07

I had aggressive neighbours like this one. We tried to compromise and they totally took this piss.

I would see if I could get an email address for him then scan the letter and email him including it. Just state that he did not, and does not have any permission to trim your hedge, which is entirely on your property. You could state you have CCTV and will pursue future criminal damage. This way you seem reasonable and also have a record of his letter and your response.

Don't engage with the rest - it will just drag you into a battle. If he does it again, I'd go to a solicitor, the council and police.

Gingernaut · 20/10/2022 06:27

Trainfromredhill · 12/10/2022 22:17

@Londongent a 6 foot fence won’t work because he has built his garden up (usuing our wall on the other side of the hedge) by 2-3 feet. So from his side a 6 foot fence would still only be 3-4 feet high.
@6poundshower doing all of your suggestions.

just to be clear, I am not depriving this man of a view. Both of our gardens have beautiful views into fields. Every window from the back of his house looks across the same valley that I do. He could have the exact same view he is complaining I am depriving him of if he moved his garden furniture to the bottom of his garden. But he doesn’t want to do that. He just wants to stare across my garden instead.

Just to be clear

He's using your garden wall as his retaining wall?

Either he's used your wall to build some sort of patio, or there's tons of soil now reliant on the structural integrity of your garden wall?

Jesus, he's an entitled prick

When you seek legal advice, bring this up. It's potentially dangerous

Spareline · 20/10/2022 07:41

I would avoid doing anything directly antagonistic, such as moving the trampoline, playing loud music etc. Much as it amuses MN to egg people on to deliberately annoy their neighbours, it never ends well and will just be a constant source of stress for you.

Continue with your plans to grow the hedge (avoid anything like leylandii, however tempting it is to plant something fast growing) and I would definitely try and put some kind of net up on your side to avoid footballs going over.

Clutterbugsmum · 20/10/2022 07:50

Your fence height is from your garden height not his.

My fence at the bottom is the garden is 6ft 6in on my side but is 9ft on my neighbour side as there garden is lower than ours.

AnOldCynic · 20/10/2022 08:15

@ScaredSceptic is correct. Raising the ground level by more than 30cm constitutes development and requires planning permission. Plus raising the ground by 4' will likely affect the stability of your wall.

Fleabea · 21/10/2022 13:41

Turangawaewae · 20/10/2022 06:07

I had aggressive neighbours like this one. We tried to compromise and they totally took this piss.

Don't engage with the rest - it will just drag you into a battle. If he does it again, I'd go to a solicitor, the council and police.

This is a very sensible suggestion and means if he does anything to your hedge then he is in the wrong. As amusing as it would be to piss him off with the trampoline, it would give him ammunition against you should this escalate.

What a prick!

SpidersAreShitheads · 22/10/2022 03:47

AnOldCynic · 20/10/2022 08:15

I agree. I was reading a few days ago about you require permission to have decking that's raised more than 30cm and I was really surprised. But it was on a planning portal and definitely an accurate source.

You can check online to see if planning permission was granted. If it wasn't, I would report it and he'll have to apply for retrospective permission. If retrospective permission isn't granted, he would have to lower his garden and that would solve a great deal of the problem....

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