So fed up. Feel like running away from it all.

[Dilraj68]

Started a thread a while ago about my landlord wanting to sell up and I've to move out mid September.

Can't find anything suitable, ideally a 4 bed home for which I'm happy to pay shortfall (along with housing benefit as it won't cover it all. This is what I've done for the past 5 years.) However, with inflation going insane and kids not helping me financially, I'm in such a state and I'm scared we'll be out on the streets.

Kids aren't even helping me with finding a new place. The eldest one (who's working) has stopped talking to me because she felt so insulted that I asked her to contribute. Grudgingly she deposited £200 which I quickly withdrew as it would have paid a bit of my overdraft off. I used some of the cash to buy food.

Middle child is starting her 2nd year uni in September. My son spends 4 days at his dad's, he may as well live there. I'm just feeling like such a failure that I can't keep my kids together. They're moaning about having to pack up and move and really not helping the situation. I want to keep my family together under one roof, the girls are saying that they'll live with their dad (who's also having housing issues ) as their uni and workplace is near to him.

It's sooo difficult finding a place, I'm having to downsize my requirements if it means we can all be together.

But I don't want them to resent me if somewhere down the line I make it permanent that they live with their dad while I take a smaller property for myself and my youngest. Right now, every estate agent is refusing to take me on when I mention my children's ages. Yes, they're adults. They can move out and fend for themselves, I've not stopped them. But they won't. I don't have much time. I'm struggling to put food on the table, shop for necessities ( the kids buy their own snacks and toiletries etc ) but I'm finding it hard to stay focused at work knowing that I've gotta keep chasing the estate agents. I've got no money in the bank, just a bit cash to tide me over until I get paid next Tuesday.

Just sooo fed up with everything.

Stop letting your kids away with so much.

If they want to continue to live in your house they need to contribute. If they want you to rent an expensive hard to find larger house then they help and pay.

What point were you going to make them pay their way?

The high earning child is leaving this job as she's starting her post graduate course and the middle who doesn't work is to start her 2nd year. The 3rd one is just doing a few hours waitressing at the weekend so he's earning peanuts.

Hey OP, I remember your other thread - if I recall correctly, don't some of your DC have some health issues?

I'm so sorry you're going through this. I'm self-employed and currently am trying to sort out selling mine and my mum's house, buying a new place and building her an annexe. I have lost contracts over the last few months because I can't concentrate on working. So I totally understand what you mean about struggling to focus.

I think you said you already had an eviction notice (if I'm thinking of the right thread!) and you're saying you have until mid-September? That gives you three months to keep looking like mad, something might come up. There's still time. It's scary and uncertain though, I get it. Just make sure you're registered with every estate agent possible, every portal, and are looking everywhere - Facebook property, Gumtree property, local noticeboards in shops etc. Either a 4-bed will come up, or it won't and your children will have to live with their dad while you take something smaller. It's not ideal but that's the emergency solution.

It's really stressful and it's a lot on your shoulders. In six months time this will be done, one way or another. Just keep reminding yourself it's only the next few months to get through and then you'll be in your new home.

You really do have my sympathy. It's a lot on your shoulders.

Thank you for your kind words.

Two of my kids have ADHD, I've registered with local estate agents but they're asking that my annual income should be at least £54k! I've even looked at 3 bedroom properties but they've belittled me by saying I've not got any hopes of even getting that as my annual income is so low. I'm prepared to move far away if that's where the houses are. Just feel so depressed.