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Original poster

Horrible time trying to exchange and complete

28 replies

Stevie77 · 14/06/2022 22:25

A bit of a rant but can't include too many details as it'd be very outing, possibly already is...

We're having an awful time having finally reached the point of exchange. After months of going through the slow process that selling and buying a house in England is, and going over the same minor issues with our buyers umpteen times. And after them missing an exchange date requested by them which has caused us having to cancel a planned holiday - we've finally reached the point where all parties in our pretty small chain are ready to exchange.

But we can't. Because our buyers have royally messed up which means we can't agree on a mutually convenient date of completion. Buyers have created themselves a situation where the only possible date to complete is one really inconvenient to us in several ways. The only way around it is for them to suffer a large enough financial loss that they're not willing to suffer. It is completely down to their own mistake, poor communication and decision-making.

So we're at a stalemate. And all the pressure seems to be on us to compromise and to be honest, it's making what is an already stressful life event even more stressful. Our EA has been working tirelessly trying to find a way around so that they get paid but is hitting a brick wall with the buyers. We've tried standing our ground, pushed and pushed back but the longer it goes on the more it seems it'll have to be us who'll have to compromise. Situations like this make us both want to pull the plug on the whole thing. I honestly would cut my nose to spite my face here.

To top it all, we don't even have the kind of radiators where we can stuff prawns down😛

OP posts:
Laquila · 14/06/2022 22:29

Ugh, I really sympathise. It's so bloody stressful!! The obvious question is, what would it cost you to cut your losses now and walk away?

Member250790 · 14/06/2022 22:46

Could you knock it down and rebuild? What about a passivhaus kit home? Might be cheaper and you'd get a better finish.

abw94 · 14/06/2022 22:48

What have they messed up on?

SausageAndCash · 14/06/2022 23:15

It sounds horrendous.

Is the inconvenience of such magnitude that you would drop your sake price by half the loss they would incur on your preferred date?

If it helps, it’s inside curtain poles. For the prawns.

SpidersAreShitheads · 15/06/2022 03:27

Are you absolutely sure you can't complete on that date? You describe it as "inconvenient" to you in many ways which of course is hugely frustrating, but are you sure it's not something that's worth swallowing just to get this over the line?

Absolutely you shouldn't have to. But if they won't budge and you don't want to pull out, sometimes it's just worth being the bigger person to save yourself more hassle in the long run.

Minimalme · 15/06/2022 06:51

Just move on that date - you can make it work!

I have been waiting to move for nine months. It is torture and only death would prevent me agreeing to a suggested date.

And yes, then put prawns in the curtain pole Grin

KarrotKake · 15/06/2022 07:00

Your buyers are saying they can only complete on one day in the whole year? They need to be a bit flexible.

Where are your buyers in the chain? Could it be split, and them sell, put their stuff in storage for a week, then purchase?

Orangesare · 15/06/2022 07:04

We had this problem and in the end had to give in and move on the day they wanted.
the buyers were still really unhappy as the move out on our part was chaos (the sale completed very early in the day and little chance to clean) as dh was trying to move and he’d never moved before, look after the kids and look after me when I was seriously ill after a hospital admission. It was all explained to them.
Just agree to their date, remove your kit and hand the keys over. Buyers are a pain in the neck.

CrapBucket · 15/06/2022 07:05

I really do feel for you. My only advice is grit your teeth and do whatever you need to. Remember your aim is to move into your new home. The process is beyond shit but the end result will be wonderful.

Your arsehole buyers will have to continue being their stupid selfish incompetent useless selves for the rest of their lives. You only have to deal with them until the end of this process.

Lastqueenofscotland2 · 15/06/2022 07:09

I would just move on the date. My buyers insisted on the one day out of 365 I said I could not do right from the off. For the sake of it going through I just went with it in the end.

pilates · 15/06/2022 07:19

This was me a year ago. I gave in to our buyers which caused us great inconvenience but we are in our lovely house and very happy. I won’t lie it still pisses me off thinking back what we had to go through but just think of the bigger picture.

BookwormButNoTime · 15/06/2022 07:43

Inconvenient vs impossible?

My purchase took 8 months to go through. Cash buyer and the property we were buying was probate (which had been granted when we offered). The seller was the biggest arse ever. Kept wanting more money for stuff, like the 40 year old carpets. When we got the keys they had even removed all the lightbulbs!!!!

Honestly, unless it’s impossible then I would just suck it up.

becausetrampslikeus · 15/06/2022 07:58

They won't take the hit

And neither will you by the feel of things

Could you meet half way ? So one person move to a hotel and put stuff in storage and split the costs ?

123walrus · 15/06/2022 08:09

If you could say what the restrictions on dates each side is facing it might help people suggest solutions? Hundreds if not thousands of people move every day so it won’t be outing.

Eg if the buyers have booked a removal firm for a particular day and will lose £5k if they cancel but you’re due at your sisters wedding that day… well perhaps the buyers could cover the cost of you putting your things in storage the day before and staying in a hotel.

Original poster
Stevie77 · 15/06/2022 09:40

Thank you, everyone!

@123walrus it's basically that minus the wedding and their movers now can't/won't play ball with them and there are other date restrictions due to commitments that can't be changed, both on our side and theirs e.g. they've also booked a holiday😤. Honestly, these people are d!cks of the highest order. Not even FTB!!

Someone upthread asked if it was impossible or inconvenient. It's not impossible, just inconvenient. and it's more the fact that their unilateral decision is forcing our hand to agree to something that doesn't work for us that's pissing us off. We can't move to a hotel, we have kids and a dog and the upheaval for us is greater than it is for them.

OP posts:
ChicCroissant · 15/06/2022 10:05

It does sound as if you are completely hacked off that you cancelled your holiday and are now digging in on the smaller details because of that, tbh!

You've lost sight of the long term aim, which is to move to your next house. Your buyers are just a part of that, so focus your eyes on the prize at the end and just do what needs to be done to get everything moving towards that.

While I appreciate that you are frustrated with your buyers, surely if you stop them buying your property you can't move forward either which only hurts you in the long run? It is really stressful buying and selling property and a lot of us lose perspective on the process at some point! I hope it all works out for you, OP.

sunshinesupermum · 15/06/2022 10:20

No matter how inconvenient it is for you and how badly your buyers are behaving, do you want this house or not? If you are reared to lose these buyers and the new house too, and start the whole process again that is your choice now. Sorry they're being such a PITA.

CheltenhamLady · 15/06/2022 11:05

It is bloody hard work, isn't it? We had a similar issue to yours, and we seriously wanted to back out, but we gritted our teeth and made the required changes to arrangements at considerable inconvenience and the move went ahead. Of course, I ranted and raved in private, but fortunately, DH was the calming influence (naturally, he hadn't been the one negotiating with all the chain!🤔)

We love our new home and we are so glad we got it over the line.

Good luck!

Original poster
Stevie77 · 15/06/2022 14:14

Yes, we're just going to have to suck it up aren't we?😒

OP posts:
TigerLilyTail · 15/06/2022 14:18

Stevie77 · 15/06/2022 14:14

Yes, we're just going to have to suck it up aren't we?😒

Probably, but once it's done, it's done and it will all be a distant memory soon enough. They definitely sound like complete arseholes though.

123walrus · 15/06/2022 14:23

@Stevie77 What’s the reason you can’t complete on the date they’ve booked their movers? Is it something that could be overcome if the buyer would pay towards it?

becausetrampslikeus · 15/06/2022 14:36

Stevie77 · 15/06/2022 14:14

Yes, we're just going to have to suck it up aren't we?😒

Yip

But I hope your new house is lovely for you

Candleabra · 15/06/2022 14:45

So frustrating for you.
I had to cancel going to a wedding for a house move. The buyer pulled every stunt possible, crying to the estate agents, threatening to pull out. They were a teacher and would only complete on the Friday of half term. They’d never mentioned this as a constraint, and would not entertain any other day of the week. I’d been really flexible about loads of things. It really pissed me off.
But think of the big picture and just get a date agreed. It helps to reframe it in your head as you taking control rather than giving in.

Softpebbles · 15/06/2022 14:49

I’m going through similar at the moment, although ours is with a house builder - feel like they are bullies.

think of the long goal.

Twiglets1 · 15/06/2022 15:18

That’s unfortunate about the radiators but don’t you have a loose floorboard or something to use instead??