Declaration of trust?

[SunriseMoon]

I'm buying a house with my wife (both women). She's selling her flat to provide the whole deposit, and I am the sole earner so will be paying all mortgage and bills - I'm not sure if or when this will change as my wife has a chronic illness. The deposit covers 50% of the house purchase, with a mortgage for the rest.

We are confused as to whether a declaration of trust is a good idea/worth the angst to protect her deposit. I have two children from a previous relationship so inheriting is complex and there's an exh to guard against. She's also worried that everything would go to me if we split.

If we do wills now which include details of what would happen to her deposit, is that enough to ensure she can stay in the house as long as she wants? And if we get divorced we'd sort out a fair financial split at the time? I can't get my head around making arrangements now for a future divorce we'll probably never have.

I'm not sure what a declaration of trust does if we have wills in place, and if it's even fair for her to get to ringfence this if I am paying the mortgage. We're not rich so there's little opportunity for me to save. We'll ask our solicitors but they will obviously want to sell us the DoT if they can.

My preference would be to treat all of our money as family money, but I appreciate it's her inheritance and her security and I would have to rent forever without her, so perhaps I have to make peace with it?

I'm not sure if the same applies to same sex marriages (it probably does, why wouldn't it), but
a) you should put the house in both names, so you both own it
b) the house will become the sole property of the surviving partner if one of you dies
c) if the person without children dies first, the children of the other partner will inherit everything when she dies
d) ex husbands have nothing to do with anything, they are ex
e) you could buy as "tennants in common" rather than "joint tennants" - that way you each own half (or any portion you deem fair) of the house and can will your own portion to whoever you want.

I am not a lawyer.

Talk to your solicitors. There may be no need for any additional documentation and in my experience they won't sell you a DoT if you don't need one.

As I understand it protecting against divorce and protecting against death/inheritance will need different things anyway. Eg if you are married and buy as joint tenants then when one of you dies the other one automatically gets the rest of the property. If that's not what you want then you should probably buy as tenants in common and leave your bit of the property where you want it to go. If you divorce after a short marriage/no children then it could be argued that she should keep her deposit, so you might want a prenup for that.

Legal advice needed for sure.

Thank you both - maybe I need to trust the solicitors a bit more...

Solicitors shouldn’t sell you anything you don’t need - they have a duty to act in your best interest, which means not selling unnecessary services.

It is frustrating that such a tightly regulated profession is so untrusted, but I guess that is for the profession to sort out!

Trust your solicitor.

I’ve never viewed a DoT as an “extra” to make money off the client. It’s part of the legal advice.

You need to decide between you what’s fair but a DoT sounds sensible in your circumstances.

Leave each other a life interest in your shares of the house in your wills. That way your DC can inherit your bit and your DW won’t be homeless if you die first.