Pregnant and need to decide where to live

[conversationswithenemies]

Need some wisdom from Mumsnet! Will try to keep this really straightforward as it's just a mind boggle to me right now.

I own a mortgaged 3bed home worth £1m with about £500k equity, bought 10 years ago. My DP owns a mortgaged 1 bed worth £500k with about £200k equity, bought 10months ago...!!!

I am 3 months pregnant and we currently live in DP's place. Unplanned, but we love each other and are committed to making it work.

DP wants us to continue living at his flat with the baby, and sell in 2 years time to get a bigger place together. I would also sell my place.

I want us to sell his place now (or rent it out), move back to mine and then eventually sell and buy somewhere together but there will be no rush as space and location are reasonable.

I am not sure what is the better option financially, whether it makes sense to live in the 1 bed and save or sell it now (probably at a loss as only bought recently).

Noone can tell you which is the better financial option as we have no idea what your mortage, income and outgoings are. Or even where the properties are located (close to daycare, jobs etc?).

How long have you been together? Are you going to get married? If I were in DH's position, I would not want to sell my flat and move into your place. What happens if you split up? He'll be left without a home. And why would you need to sell his flat to buy a bigger place if you already own a house?

With a baby, I would want more than a 1 bedroom especially as you easily have the means to have one. Both of our dc slept with us until they were 2-3 years, but you may have a baby who won't sleep well in with you for an extended period of time - and mainly because babies and toddlers have lots of 'stuff' and it's nice to have an extra room to put it away in, even if you don't use that room for sleeping.

As it's a (I assume?) relatively new relationship, I wouldn't want to sell yet, but I would want to live somewhere with more space and also access to places to go and things to do and family while on mat leave. Would there be a difference in terms of expenses to live in one house vs the other? Would it mean your dp's commute is longer? Does he need office space at home for home working (this will be key if he wfh at all with a baby, as it's not easy to find peace and quiet)? These would be the deciding factors for me.