Home repairs..So overwhelmed with it all

[notmrscookie]

Brought house 23 years ago with husband and 2 young children. How just me and 2 young men .
Divorce hit me hard and home repair where done by doggy builders or not at all .
Now in better place my roof is being done as we speak by highly qualified and recommend roofer so is water tight and guttering replaced and all outside wood painted. conservatory roof done last year and new garage door last year.

Awaiting ceiling painting and rooms quoted 1200 😒.

Friends soon changing 3 light for mate rates tomorrow.

De junking rooms as over filled not massively but lounge looking better with nothing on wall.

Just so unsure if I want to stay or sell?

So wish I had someone to share the stress but I don't. My parents died when i was young and my brother isn't close to me.

Time scale support or coping methods pls

Thanks

Firstly, you’re doing the right thing by sorting the roof and guttering and outside painting first: first thing is always make a property safe and watertight from the outside before you tackle the inside.

What’s your goal? Make it a pleasant place to live? Fix issues? Change things from how they were when you were married?

I would go round with a notepad and write down exactly what needs doing in each room, however minor. At first it will seem like a huge and overwhelming list! But then you can organise it into things like:

Get a tradesperson in
DIY
Need to go to B&Q and buy a thing
Decluttering

Etc. And break it down into manageable bite-size tasks (putting an ad on Checkatrade, deciding a paint colour, watching a YouTube vid on how to do something, taking a bag to the charity shop).

Although it’s logical to do all of one type of job at once - eg decluttering, then one giant run to the tip - it’s also the most stressful as it’s a huge task. So do it by room: you say the sitting room is looking better already so why not start there and get it to a stage where you’re happy and everything’s crossed off the list. Then you can see how you feel - stay or sell? - and you’ve got one “done” Room to be your haven when there’s diy chaos elsewhere.

Painting is really easy so if you're trying to save money I would do that myself. My friend has hers done professionally and I honestly think mine looks neater.

Has Mumsnet now got its own AI bot??

Exactly what I was thinking!

It does read that way doesn't it!

OP, you’re totally doing the right thing having roof and exterior work done. It is hard to organise and execute that, so give yourself credit.

What is your dream for your life in the next few years? What do your children want now? Are they attached to the family childhood home or ready to move on? Would you like a smaller easier place, maybe a completely different style of house?

Pinterest can be a great source of inspiration. I pin lots and lots of things I like then the algorithm suggests similar styles.