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Original poster

WWYD? Buying from divorcing couple

24 replies

yellowgecko · 17/02/2022 15:31

We had a offer accepted on a house 2 months ago, the sellers are acrimoniously divorcing.

According to EA - The STBXW has changed her mind about the sale as she now wants more money to buy.
She's refusing to go into rental.
The STBXH is 'desperate to sell' (their words) and is now attempting to get a court order to force the sale.
As part of the divorce settlement the house needs to be sold.
She is in the house, he's moved out to other family.

They haven't asked us for more money yet; and we haven't offered any. We've had some paperwork only recently, what we have is incomplete. Our solicitor has advised to carry on until we're told different.

Has anyone been in this situation? How long did you wait? How did it end? Please tell me your stories, good and bad!

I have no experience of divorce / court orders and I don't know whether to sit it out or pull out before our mortgage offer expires and we've spent more money or I've gone crazy with the stress of not knowing if we're actually buying a house or not

OP posts:

GU24Mum · 17/02/2022 16:01

At the risk of being the voice of doom, this has "nightmare transaction" written all over it especially if you are in a chain.

Honestly, I'd look for something else!

Original poster

yellowgecko · 17/02/2022 16:40

@GU24Mum I know 😫
I'm bracing myself to lose it. It's perfect for us and there's not much else in our area right now that we can afford.

OP posts:

Bex000 · 17/02/2022 16:42

Sorry unless they have a signed consent order already I would not be touching this. It sounds like there is a long road before they get to that stage.

Original poster

yellowgecko · 17/02/2022 16:55

@Bex000 I didn't realise how bad relations were until we started chasing for paperwork, it took so long to come through. It's only going to get worse isn't it

OP posts:

SpikeySmooth · 17/02/2022 16:57

Walk away. Far, far away.

AgathaX · 17/02/2022 16:57

Could you keep going with this one in the hope that they'll sort themselves out, but meanwhile keep looking for something else?

Roselilly36 · 17/02/2022 16:58

We were in a chain with a divorcing couple, it wasn’t easy but it did go through in the end.

Original poster

yellowgecko · 17/02/2022 16:59

@SpikeySmooth the stubborn bit of me wants to keep going, if we don't buy it someone will. I want it to be us! But I know it's looking increasingly unlikely

OP posts:

Original poster

yellowgecko · 17/02/2022 17:00

@AgathaX yes we are, there's nothing that comes close. What does come close is £100k more

OP posts:

Original poster

yellowgecko · 17/02/2022 17:01

@Roselilly36 I'm glad it worked out for you, how painful was it? Did they both want to sell?

OP posts:

WellTidy · 17/02/2022 17:06

We bought from a divorcing couple. The purchase was delayed, as they said that they were on good terms with each other and nothing would be a problem, but the house was only one of their assets and they hadn’t agreed how hr others were goi g ti be split at the time that they accepted our offer. Agreeing how to split the other assets took longer than they expected. It was a bit of a pain at the time and we ended up staying with my PIL for a few weeks as we didn’t wa t to delay our sale.

Prior to us buying that house, we tried to buy a different house from a divorcing couple. They were a complete nightmare. One of them ended up using the son’s GCSEs as a reason why they wanted to delay the same by six months. The other half of the couple was furious. We pulled out when it was clear that the timetable wouldn’t suit us, which thankfully was only a couple of weeks after they accepted our offer.

Roselilly36 · 17/02/2022 17:21

@yellowgecko we were buying off a couple that were buying off the divorcing couple, they only wanted to buy their property, so you can imagine the stress! The divorcing couple, Husband was living there, wife had moved. In the end, the vendor of the house we were buying, went to see him and said you know the property needs to be sold, our buyer (us) are a young family, we all need to move on. It did the trick. I hope it works out for you OP.

Original poster

yellowgecko · 17/02/2022 17:59

@WellTidy we don't have the option of staying with family unfortunately

@Roselilly36 we have a young family buying ours, desperate to move in. Our sale is almost complete, we're waiting on our purchase. Im seriously considering asking for a 2nd viewing to try and reason with STBXW. DH dead against this. We also have young children if that matters.

OP posts:

AgathaX · 17/02/2022 18:08

I'd ask for another viewing, not so much to reason with the vendor, but more to just find out from him directly what the situation is.

Roselilly36 · 17/02/2022 18:14

@yellowgecko. No harm in requesting a viewing to measure up etc. And see how the land is lying. If things are already difficult, you won’t have anything to lose really. Keeping everything crossed for you.

Original poster

yellowgecko · 17/02/2022 18:28

@AgathaX the wife is in the house, I've had no direct dealings with the husband

@Roselilly36 yes, 'nothing to lose' was my thought, but she's stopped our surveyor from going in so I'm not holding out much hope that she'll let us come back

OP posts:

AgathaX · 17/02/2022 18:46

Sorry my mistake, in that case to find out the situation from her directly.

PlinkPlankPlunk · 17/02/2022 18:50

We also bought from a divorcing couple once - although we didn’t realise fir a while. It was … long! The husband had left ages ago and taken half the furniture, which explained the peculiar arrangements in the house; the wife wasn’t looking for more money but just didn’t want to move.

We just made it clear all the time we were serious, ready to move, organised etc and therefore a good bet for them

BreadInCaptivity · 17/02/2022 19:04

I've done it once and would be very wary of repeating the experience.

Essentially the house sale (though already agreed in principle) was being used as a negotiation tactic as part of the wider settlement.

They got what they wanted, we saw some progress. Then there would be a hiatus and everything ground to a halt whilst the husband in this case deliberately dragged his heels on the sale to put it in jeopardy and force a concession from his wife.

We eventuality bought the house but it took 6 months and a spell living with family so as not to lose our sale. There were many times we wanted to walk away (and very nearly did).

We only hung in there because it was at that point the perfect property for us and we were in a position to sell ours and divest the chain.

Upshot is be prepared for a very, long and frustrating process if you hang in there.

JuneWind · 17/02/2022 19:10

Not really an answer to your question, but if anything else comparable is £100k more…..maybe the wife has a point about thinking the house is worth more? Surely she’s just doing the smart thing and trying to get as much as possible for her (and possibly kids?)

Original poster

yellowgecko · 17/02/2022 19:44

@PlinkPlankPlunk yep I am thinking it's either going to go to the wire in terms of our mortgage agreement or we consider going into rental...I really don't want to do that with young children though

@BreadInCaptivity I'm so over it already if family was an option for us I'd do it. I don't think I want it enough to go into rental

@JuneWind there are a couple of serious compromises with the house that make it (in my opinion) not worth more. The £100k extra houses don't have the same compromises, the compromise is a huge mortgage for us! Houses at the same price (that we have seen) don't quite work for what we want. It's the most expensive house on the street by a long way.

OP posts:

Starseeking · 17/02/2022 19:53

I haven't experienced buying from a divorcing couple, however knowing what I know now, I'd only buy from a very motivated seller in future. It doesn't sound like the couple are both on the same page at all with this, which is where the issues will arise.

My purchase has just collapsed after 7 months of moving at the pace of an elderly vendor who said she wanted to downsize...except after 7 months of legal work for her sale and purchase, she pulled out of both, with no explanation.

If you really want it though, I'd carry on with it, and pursue other opportunities alongside it, then pull out if this one takes too long. You may end up with two sets of legal fees, but it's a small price to pay (less than £2k) to secure the home you want.

WhatAWasteOfOranges · 17/02/2022 20:48

We bought off a divorcing couple last year.. it was a bit of a nightmare but we got there in the end. We had the stamp duty hols as a hard deadline and they knew that if they didn’t make it by then the whole sale was going to collapse. The husband who no longer lived in the house was desperate for it to all go through. The wife made it hard but conceded in the end (they had no choice other than to sell as they couldn’t pay the mortgage). Completion day was a joke and she stayed hours after getting our money and then locked out the ex husband who she hadn’t let in to pack up his stuff and we were there with a 4 year old and a baby watching this shit storm go down. She also left the house in a state- I think she had detached from it as she was selling so no longer cared for it.
But we got there and got a great house that lots of people ran a mile from because of the situation. There were many times along the way I had no faith it was going to actually happen and we kept looking at other properties in the background.
Best of luck!!

pilates · 17/02/2022 20:52

Look for another property

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