New house feels strange...

[pixietinsle5]

Me, DH and our 18 month old moved into our new home 3 weeks ago. I love the house, it's so spacious and is detached with no one around us really, it has a big drive and a lot of land. It's everything I have wanted (apart from a bit of decorating needed inside but nothing major) but something feels strange about it and I can't put my finger on it 🤨 I have moved a couple of times before and I haven't ever felt like this.

I hate being home alone in our new house, I feel constantly on edge like someone is watching me. It has a lot of windows and entrances to the property and I'm constantly watching them. It almost feels like there's a weird energy there?

Has anyone ever felt this before? I really don't know what it is or how I'm feeling.

Is the new house a very different situation to anywhere you have lived before? I am wondering if it is not the house itself, but the set up which feels so different.

My MIL used to live v rurally. Beautiful house, beautiful location surrounded by fields and sheep. I have lived in many, many houses but have never lived rurally. I always felt slightly on edge at MIL's and I realised that I simply wasn't used to so much quiet, so much space.

It may be that you are experiencing something similar. That you just need to give yourself time to process and adjust.

@CagneyNYPD1 yes this house is different to anything I have lived in before. All my previous houses have been semi detached or terraced. Perhaps that's why I am feeling so strange. I thought I would love it but I feel so alone with no one around me! Especially when DH is out at night, he had to come home last night as I was so scared 😫

You do get used to it. Get some outside lighting and a dog. 😬

Yep, improve security and maybe some blinds so you don't feel so exposed.

It is so odd when you move from being around people to a house with land around & no other people.

I've lived in the middle of nowhere, terrace in a new build estate, an apartment by the sea and we finally live in our forever home.

After the experiences, we chose a large Edwardian house in a row of other Edwardian houses in a cul de sac.

There's a pedestrian walk going through so we can sit in our front garden or on our balcony and be around people but not mixing with people.

The worst house I lived in was in the middle of nowhere, looking out the windows to nothingness, it's very depressing.

But some people love it!!

Right, so firstly get all thoughts of bad vibes, spirits, weird energy etc out of your head. It's none of these.

You are just reacting to the change in environment and all that space.
Paint some bright colours, get good lighting. Put some loud music on. Get a dog!

It sounds absolutely lovely. Best wishes xx

[quote pixietinsle5]@CagneyNYPD1 yes this house is different to anything I have lived in before. All my previous houses have been semi detached or terraced. Perhaps that's why I am feeling so strange. I thought I would love it but I feel so alone with no one around me! Especially when DH is out at night, he had to come home last night as I was so scared 😫[/quote]
In that case, concentrate on security (doors, windows, lighting, out buildings) and little things to make the house feel like yours. My MIL always had the radio or TV on when at home on her own. It provided a level of background noise to fill the silence.

It will take a while for you to settle especially as you have moved in winter. But once the spring arrives and the trees are in leaf, it will feel v different. Right now, it gets do dark so quickly. But when those long summer evenings arrive, you will love it.

I felt similar moving in to my new house. Going from a townhouse to detached bungalow with lots of downstairs windows and external doors. I now have curtains and blinds on the windows and door curtains too. It feels better. I also have CCTV fitted. But the dogs are the best for helping me feel safe as while they wouldn't stop a mouse from getting in I would at least know about it.

My parents had a modern house on the edge of a field with seven sliding glass doors downstairs with no curtains. I never liked being there on my own at night.

It’s just getting used to a new house. I felt nervous being alone in our current house and couldn’t remember feeling that way before but the house felt large and strange. But it’s fine now, it was just in my head!

@onedayoranother

My parents had a modern house on the edge of a field with seven sliding glass doors downstairs with no curtains. I never liked being there on my own at night.

We used to live in a house like that. I hated, and still do, the darkness outside and knowing that anyone could be looking in from outside and we couldn’t see them.

We left the house because it was impossible to cover the windows. Our house now has metal shutters that retract in the day so we have loads of light and close firmly at night.

It was feeing exposed that scared me. Could if be this OP?

Its the change to detached/more rural nothing else

Security is a good idea.

I was also very uneasy when we moved house 2 years ago it felt off and like I was a stranger in someone else's house. redecorating/repainting etc helped hugely. I "did" complete rooms rather than small bits here and there. It helped massively

Take advantage of your windows - look outside at the amazing moon at night, find out which stars are which. We can see amazing sunset skies at this time of year.
Get some sqaured paper and plan your garden - a tree planted here will give more privacy but might cause shade, some shrubs here will give a sense a splash of colour in spring etc etc .Make it your own.

Big old sage stick and smoke the whole house imagining cleansing all negative energy, might be nonsense but if it helps you psychologically then it's worked.

We moved recently and it wasn't until we "claimed" the back garden that I started to relax in the living room. The window just looked out onto black at night even though we are on a busy estate. I put some fairy lights up out there and they draw the eye instead of nothing.

You're husband 'had' to come home because you were scared? Scared of what? That's ridiculous.

I think moving in winter is different (I've made an assumption there) as you don't get the same chance to be outside and live with the outside as well as the inside.

We moved to a more isolated house and I honestly love it - but we also got a dog at the same time. So there's always something alive in the house. I used to not like being in our old terraced house on my own over night (though I'd lived on my own for years in an end terrace). Now, no worries.

I think you just have to get used to it and put your own stamp on the place.

The person who we bought ours from was end of life , whilst the same was going through he died , but not in the house. I'm not a woo person , but I ( out loud ) spoke to him when I was at home alone. I thanked him for allowing us to live there and wished him well .
Perhaps you could do the same ? Thank everyone who has lived there and tell them you wish them and the house well .

Ring cameras all around my house give me such comfort, when I hear a noise and I know no movement has occurred it's reassuring and I know it's just my head or whatever, but not a person!