Yes I have. We did double height double width extension across the back, single side extension, moved the stairs, replastered what was still standing (not much) and rewired. Then we got onto interiors. We lived in a static caravan for 18m with two children and a cat.
Don't do it.
We were supposed to be in for 6m, turned into 18m. Ours was an old house (1870s) although thank god it wasn't listed - on day 1 we found something we weren't expecting, cue another £20k which immediately had to be spent, this wasn't an option.
We had issues with sub contractors, builders, supply chain - you name it, and this was before Brexit and the price increase of building materials.
You need to be on site every single day to keep an eye on the builders if you don't have an architect to do that for you, and we know that they cut corners and skipped things, even with that. Can one of you work from home / have enough of a grasp of building works etc to be able to discuss things with builders, especially with an older house where are you trying to match up old bits with new bits?
We came out the other end, still married, kids still alive, which was perhaps the greatest achievement. The stress was incomprehensible, the only reason we didn't divorce was because that would have been more stress and neither of us would have been able to cope with that. (We are ok now, strange how removal of that amount of stress makes you happier).
We wouldn't do it again if you paid us. Well... we would... but we know what we're doing now and what to do and what not to do (and not that we would as we have no money left now!). We'd also pick the house with a lot more cynicism, and wouldn't go near anything which was listed.
You need to get structural engineers out to see if the bones of it are still good and you need to actually listen to what they say. What are your local planners like with listed buildings? Some are ok, some are tyrannical in what you can or can't do to the property.
And finally how much money have you got? How much more could you get if you needed to if the wind blew wrong and the house fell down? Do you have a plan B if the money runs out? What's your contingency? Can you do any of it yourself? There's a reason that the price had been reduced twice with no one taking it up; the costs would be far too high for anyone commercial to make a profit, leaving it for the Grand Designs owner types, which tbh says it all really.
Based on what we spent on ours, and don't forget you will need high quality interiors to match the outside /the value of the house, you're going to need at least £500k plus contingency, on top of the £400k to buy it, which if it isn't habitable (ie no kitchen etc), you'll have to get a self build more expensive mortgage to buy. Will it be worth over £1m once complete?
Don't do it.