What can I do I hate my house :(

[foibles2011]

Well the title says it really. We moved here 3 years ago as it was what we could afford and knowing it was a bit of a renovation project. We've mostly done up the inside BUT the outside is a state still and no matter what we've done to the inside it just doesn't work, flow I don't know what the right words are. It always feels gloomy and dark and I feel stressed when I'm here it just doesn't work. I feel embarrassed to have anyone here and depressed living here. We tried moving this year but had two houses fall through and now there is nothing else on the market and honestly we just don't have any more spare cash for fees and at the same time we don't have any money left to finish the house. It's a miserable situation. I'm not really expecting suggestions, I guess it's just a vent really because it's all feeling really hopeless

Hi OP, that sounds so hard, I'm sorry. It's probably not helped that we've spent so much time indoors over the past few years due to COVID. And the approaching winter might be contributing to the way you're feeling. Would you be willing to share your floorplan or external photos? There are lots of people on this board with amazing ideas on improving homes.

Or, if you've already decided you want to move and it's just a matter of waiting to find your next house, is there anything you can do in the meantime to improve the value of your house? That way you'll feel like you're at least making progress. Things like painting, tidying, new kitchen drawer pulls, etc can all make a big difference in resale values.

I'm sorry it's feeling hopeless. It will get better!

@sarahb083

Hi OP, that sounds so hard, I'm sorry. It's probably not helped that we've spent so much time indoors over the past few years due to COVID. And the approaching winter might be contributing to the way you're feeling. Would you be willing to share your floorplan or external photos? There are lots of people on this board with amazing ideas on improving homes.

Or, if you've already decided you want to move and it's just a matter of waiting to find your next house, is there anything you can do in the meantime to improve the value of your house? That way you'll feel like you're at least making progress. Things like painting, tidying, new kitchen drawer pulls, etc can all make a big difference in resale values.

I'm sorry it's feeling hopeless. It will get better!

Pics are a good idea! Have you got (cheap) mirrors on the walls to make the rooms feel lighter?

The Facebook group DIY on a budget may help here. Some people have done amazing things with very little.

Sorry you feel so miserable, OP.

I know this is easier to say than to do when you feel as you do right now, but try to think about positive aspects. You have a secure home and can't be evicted on the whim of a landlord. You can decorate as you wish, and have done so. It keeps the rain off, it's warm (if it isn't, turn the thermostat up a notch: it'll cost a little bit more but what price being miserable?).

Don't worry what the outside looks like: the inside is full of warmth and - I hope, as your OP uses "we" a lot - love.

Thank you for the lovely replies I really wasn't expecting them we have actually added a lot of value to the house already but I think my hearts just not in it any more. I've tried to attach the floor plans but they're deceptive because a lot is missing from them (our bedroom in attic is half the size due to sloped ceiling, main bedroom has stair casing that is much larger and awkward so can't be used as main bedroom etc etc). If I could I would knock the whole downstairs through to make it open plan. I can't get photos to load will keep trying. X

I think the kitchen is in the wrong place and out fo the way instead of the heart of the home!

It would annoy me just bringing the shipping in!

Is it still for sale? Or do you stilll want to live there?

@BluebellsGreenbells no not for sale we literally can't afford to go through the process again at the moment - but definitely don't want to be here

But I think you just hit the nail on the head with the disconnected feeling x

My thought would be to not have a formal dining room unless you really need one. Use the dining bit of the kitchen and have two living rooms.
You don't say if you have children but if you do I'd suggest Turing the back room into a family sitting/play room with access to outdoors and the front room as a more sophisticated adult snug/sitting room.

My first thought would be if you could to turn the dining, breakfast and utility room into one large open kitchen that goes across the back of the house.

If then use part of the old kitchen for a utility and the put up a wall to make an office/playroom which I’d access from the main hallway by taking out those cupboards

@EducatingArti this is the arrangement we have but the breakfast room is a squeeze as it barely fits a 4 seat table so we have to push it back to the wall and then pull it out again at meal times (we have kids) x

@SnarkyBag this would be ideal if we had the money! X

If you are planning to stay there long term and you can see the potential I’d stop spending any money on the house trying to make small changes and save up to do the ideal renovation. Took me 14 years to have the money to do our house the way I wanted and I was hugely embarrassed by the state of it by that time but now it’s exactly as I would want it to be!

Why don't you swap the lounge and dining rooms. The lounge would then overlook the garden and presumably be brighter. What size of table do you have in the breakfast room. A small circular table could work especially if it can be extended.

Looks like there's only one window in each room which may be why some of them feel gloomy. Could you do anything to knock through a couple of rooms even if you don't totally refit them yet? From the lounge into the dining room? Or kitchen into dining room?

Just from having a quick look, I would keep the lounge where it is, it's nice to have a separate lounge, I'd knock the wall between the dining room and breakfast room and turn that whole area into a nice open plan kitchen diner than opens out to the garden. Then the current kitchen could be an office or a snug or something like that?

The cupboards behind the stairs in the hall, are they full height? Could you knock through those so you have direct hall access to the kitchen? Then block up the back door to the kitchen, and incorporate that area into the kitchen cabinets, island in the breakfast area and knock through to the dining room for a kitchen/diner?

I suspect the room you use most in the house is the ‘breakfast room’ which is also the smallest room and probably the darkest.

If you don’t have much money then there isn’t any scope for doing any major structural changes. The best you can do is train yourselves to use the biggest nicest rooms. And save to try and move/restructure some of the rooms. Is the wall at the back beteeen the utility and the breakfast room a load bearing wall (was it originally an outside wall and support the bathroom upstairs?)

If the table is squashed in the breakfast room, why not have bench seats built up to one wall, like a diner. It can be comfy and saves a lot of space.

That floor plan seems to have potential! Would you be able to afford to rearrange the layout and extend at the back to give you a wow factor light and airy kitchen/dining/living extension? I’d you did that and kept a formal living room at the front your have most people’s ideal layout. It wouldn’t matter if the formal living room was a bit dark as it would be mainly for evening use so you could embrace the darkness and paint it in rich, deep colours. Would probably be cheaper in the long run rather than incurring moving costs and moving to a house which will probably need some work too. There is loads of inspiration in Pinterest for this type of extension.

I’d be tempted to change the current kitchen to utility/loo/coat and shoe storage and then create a large kitchen/living space from the remaining rooms at the back. Even if you can’t afford to extend would probably be a decent space.