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Original poster

Feeling embarrassed applying for somewhere to live

41 replies

thesearch21 · 14/09/2021 11:40

I am in my early thirties and single. For the past few years I have been saving for a deposit whilst living at home and managed to scrape together about 15k.

Unfortunately my profession is not very highly paid. I didn't used to think it was that bad naively until I came to look into places to buy. I am a manager in my profession, but i'm repeatedly told by lenders my income in low. I don't particularly want to change careers, I do like what I do, and I think that is important for someone single like myself that my focus in on a job I like. But there isn't any other ways to really increase my income. And again, naively, thought my deposit would make up for this fact.

I applied for shared ownership, rejected on affordability. Asked for lower share, again rejected. Got a Mortgage in principle for 80k... which will buy me, nadda.

I feel like I might aswell just rent but then what was the point of saving and living carefully for all this time to save my deposit in the first place? Its getting me really down, I feel like i've failed and way outstayed my welcome with family now.

Ive actually come off the phone to mortgage advisors in tears as i didnt think it would be this bad and im embarrassed.

Can anybody relate or give me any hope?

OP posts:
idontlikealdi · 14/09/2021 11:42

Where do you live / work? What's your warning potential?

Bluntness100 · 14/09/2021 11:43

If you can only borrow eighty then it seems you’re not far off min wage. So yes of course it will be hard to get a mortgage for more. You need to save a bigger deposit or apply for different jobs.

Babamamananarama · 14/09/2021 11:46

I feel for you OP - housing in this country is fucked.

Could you possibly buy with a friend? 1 bed places are v expensive compared to 2 beds.

Olivegreenstrawberries · 14/09/2021 11:53

What about buying a doer upper? Asking for a payrise? See what other similar jobs are out there for a little more money? Can you have a side hustle? Can parents help out with deposit? Could you rent in a house share, while still saving a little money?

Boobieboobieboobie · 14/09/2021 11:55

Would you consider moving somewere that you could buy a property for £80k, Im sure mnetters can help!

Boobieboobieboobie · 14/09/2021 11:57

www.rightmove.co.uk/properties/111605069

anthurium · 14/09/2021 12:04

I'm sorry you're feeling down about the situation you're in but it is perfectly understandable.

I bought my flat aged 38 and in the SE also single, it was really difficult. I live in a shared accommodation flat, half rent half mortgage and I got very lucky to have managed to secure it. There was an eligibility criteria stipulated and I also had 20k worth of savings at the time. If you know the salary thresholds that the HA is looking for I think one of the solutions is to get a better paid job, needs must and maybe after some time you could return to your chosen industry? Otherwise, you may continue the situation you're in. I'd advise not getting involved with friends financially, you don't know their credit scores/financial behavior, it could prove to be a disaster.

WeAreTheHeroes · 14/09/2021 12:06

That flat is tenanted and for sale by auction. It isn't going to work for the OP for those reasons.

Boobieboobieboobie · 14/09/2021 12:17

@WeAreTheHeroes

That flat is tenanted and for sale by auction. It isn't going to work for the OP for those reasons.
Oh ok. Im sure we can help find somewere if op is willing to move.
HollowTalk · 14/09/2021 12:42

Have you looked at shared ownership schemes?

What part of the country do you live in? Do you work from home?

scottishnames · 14/09/2021 13:05

OP When I bought my first little house I was not earning much either, and nor were many of my friends (academic/creative industries, most of us).

What we almost all did was to have lodgers. This was not perfect and I was very lucky - I never had a bad lodger and met some interesting people that way. Mostly, I found lodgers through word of mouth/colleagues at work . Several were overseas students studying on short courses.

I think I told my mortgage company (and insurers) , and they did not mind. I know one friend actually agreed with her mortgage company always to have a lodger to 'support' her income. After a few years, I had saved enough to buy a different, still very small house, on my own.

Yes, it is a great sacrifice of privacy. But it's not going to last for ever. The government allows you to earn a fair bit (£7,500) of money from lodger income without having to pay tax* on it, as well. Lodgers are not like tenants - so long as you start off with a proper formal agreement, you are protected and can - if you have to - ask lodgers you don't get on with to leave at very short notice.

Of course, this would only work if you live in an area where house prices are relatively reasonable - but £7500 is approx £600 a month, which could be a very helpful contribution towards mortgage costs.

Another thing that might help is getting someone to act as a guarantor to your mortgage.

Finally, there are places - eg not fancy but safe and decent parts of Glasgow - where you can buy a two-bedroom ex local authority flat for between £100,000 - £150,000.
Example here: www.rightmove.co.uk/properties/113064950#/?channel=RES_BUY

WeAreTheHeroes · 14/09/2021 16:17

This thread has reminded me that when I first looked into buying a house twenty years ago, I was turned down by a major mortgage lender because my basic salary was low. I was upset and thought I wouldn't be able to buy somewhere. I went to a mortgage broker who found another lender who was prepared to lend to me. Obviously, prices were lower then and my first mortgage was a stretch with interest rates around 8%.

If you can say whereabouts you are/where you would be prepared to look, I'm sure you'll be able to find somewhere.

Original poster
thesearch21 · 14/09/2021 16:33

Thank you for all your messages. I have felt so terrible the last few days because of all this.

I don't feel I can talk to people about it and again, its embarrassing. I have a couple of married friends with a houses who ask how things are going and I can't bare to tell them. :(

OP posts:
KloppsTeeth · 14/09/2021 17:49

We’ve been there. It feels embarrassing, but actually you shouldn’t be embarrassed as many other people are in the same situation. We ended up having to buy a 1 bedroom house in an area we wouldn’t normally look at which wasn’t ideal but it got us on the ladder.
It’s awful that a decent wage and hard working people can’t buy a place to live, there should be a better system.

TheFoundations · 14/09/2021 17:52

It's one of the common downsides of being single. It's not you, it's the fact that the system is set up for couples, and even they find it hard to get on the property ladder.

Don't take it personally. You've done all the right things in a wrong world.

lanbro · 14/09/2021 17:57

It's really, really hard to buy anywhere on your own. When I first bought it was with a friend, and we had a lodger, even though the house was on £77k. Those were in the days of 100% interest only mortgages (which I still have as I'll never get a better deal and I can overpay as much I like)

But xh lives in that house, I'm renting and despite having a decent income I can't get a mortgage either. There's no reason you can't rent, if you're ready to move out, owning isn't the be all and end all. You may meet someone you want to buy with in the next couple of years. Save your deposit and keep trying to add with it but don't put your life on hold. There is no shame in renting, having things fixed for you is a big weight off, you have the flexibility to live where you like, even a nice area you'd be priced our of mortgage wise

Bluntness100 · 14/09/2021 18:00

Op, I understand you’re sad but brush yourself off and thing of wats to fix it. I get you enjoy your job, but it’s wholly possible you will also enjoy higher paid jobs, right now you are sacrificing home ownership to stay in a very low paid job.

That’s a choice you can make but it is a choice and one you need to accept the downsides of. And honestly there is nothing to say you won’t enjoy other jobs.
Is staying on this job worth sacrificing your dream of home ownership for? Or is it worth looking for something better paid and moving towards buying yout own home.

MyAnacondaMight · 14/09/2021 18:01

I’m guessing you earn around £18k p.a, based on an £80k mortgage offer, which is barely above minimum wage if full time. Any chance you’re being vastly underpaid for your role? Or is your industry known for being poorly paid?

If you can share more info re your career/profession, people may be able to suggest changes you could make to increase your earning potential.

3WildOnes · 14/09/2021 18:09

I think you have to decide which is more important to you. Home ownership and financial security or a job you enjoy?

SimonedeBeauvoirscat · 14/09/2021 18:25

Tell us what your job is OP and we can try and help you identify ways of increasing your income! It is one of the shit parts of being single though, I do sympathise. I often think that many low paid jobs are effectively subsidised by the other half of a couple earning more so the impact of low pay is mitigated. Everything is priced for couples. It’s so frustrating.

Original poster
thesearch21 · 15/09/2021 08:49

Im a shop worker. But in management. Im not really wanting to change my job, I like it but i wont say why as it would be outing.

I feel like the only option here is to save 50k which will take me probably to the end of my life lol

OP posts:
Bluntness100 · 15/09/2021 08:53

Yes if you won’t change your job, and there are career paths in retail which lead to higher paid roles, then yes the only option you have is to save a much bigger deposit, it’s a choice you’re making.

Babamamananarama · 15/09/2021 09:05

Great advice upthread about lodgers - and that Glasgow flat is really nice for £100k.

OP you are stuck at the moment between the twin evils of unviable low pay, and unaffordable housing. But you are so close - it's brilliant that you've saved as much as you have on that wage. I think you need to think a bit more flexibly about your job. Perhaps you work in a charity shop, maybe it's your sense of loyalty that's keeping you wedded to it. But your earning power as a retail manager is higher than you are currently getting - even if you got up to £24/25k a year - which is totally achievable in retail - it would put a lot more in reach as your mortgage affordability would go up too. You could move to a different, better paid job for a year or two in order to get your mortgage secured and then once you've done it, if you really want to return to what you do now on a lower wage, you could.

Telegram · 15/09/2021 09:07

There's no reason why you wouldn't enjoy a new job -- possibly even more so. How about applying for roles in larger companies with greater promotion opportunities. Your current managerial position means that you have transferable skills and puts you in a good position?

Heronwatcher · 15/09/2021 09:23

Where about are you based OP? Is there really nothing you can buy, even if grotty? What about asking the housing associations what their criteria is? Or maybe speaking to a broker who might know a bit more about how much different lenders will lend?

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