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Property/DIY

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Original poster

Moving date - I think we need to change it, WWYD?

15 replies

SlimBoyFat · 26/07/2021 06:21

Apologies if this has posted twice as I just lost a huge post!

Will try be brief. We are moving to a wreck that needs a lot of work but will give us the space we need. Our buyers have been v slow but the sellers are ready. Last week dp and I discussed just dictating a moving date and discussed with EA/solicitors and did this. I work FT out the home so have to apply for leave and it's v difficult to get short notice leave in the summer holidays so I have now applied and got these days (a Thursday/Friday). Dp works part time at home so it's easier for him.

Last night when we went to bed I was casually checking our online calendar and I notice the Thursday he has picked happens to be a day he has agreed with his exw that we will have his dc for a week. His dc are 8 and 9 and live a 3 hour round trip away and he picks them up. We are moving 40 mins away and I have 3 dc (over 18 but can't drive) and a dog and we have one 5 seater car.

This means on moving day, dp will be gone 3 hours with the car. It also means when he gets back, it will take almost 3 hours to ferry everyone to new house (as it will now take 2 trips fgs). Because the house is a wreck, I was planning on sorting out his dc room before they came - one has a leak in the ceiling and we don't have beds for every room which means it's likely people will be on mattresses for the weekend.

I told dp last night this just cannot work - he is now pissed off as he doesn't want to move the dates (it will also mean it's unlikely I can get leave) and thinks it's fine. His exw can't drop them off as she's at work that day so they need to come first thing.

Wwyd - I haven't moved for 20 odd years but I do remember it as being pretty stressful and I think this will just make it worse!

OP posts:

LemonViolet · 26/07/2021 06:38

Some of your older kids can get a taxi to the new house, and other than that, you just make the best of camping with mattresses on floors etc! Great they get to be part of the day.

Thisisanartattack · 26/07/2021 06:48

If you dictated the date and everyone agreed to it (have they - you didn’t say?) I would be reluctant to move it. Although if you haven’t exchanged yet anything could happen in the meantime.

Surely there are ways around what sound like logistical problems? Can you hire a bigger car for the weekend and use it whilst your DP is away? It’s not that expensive vs the cost of moving. Or could you book hotels for the first night if you’re worried about leaks? Any chance your DPs DC could come a couple of days later just as a one off? I doubt anyone will get long term harm from mattresses on the floor. Do you have family members that can help put beds together etc? Older DC could probably do this if they are practical.

Original poster

SlimBoyFat · 26/07/2021 06:55

I didn't realise they were coming then (it's out of their normal pattern!). The date hasn't been agreed by our buyers yet so there's still a chance it might not work. I'm more thinking of his dc than anything else - I don't want them to be stressed/upset by the move and rooms not ready etc. No other family that could help and we can't move the dates his dc are coming.

If you think it will be fun, I could run with it - tbh because my kids are so much older I've forgotten what 8/9 yr olds are like in terms of what they are likely to manage if you see what I mean!

OP posts:

Iwastheparanoidex · 26/07/2021 06:57

Can you hire a small car for the day?

I don’t think 8/9 will mind the guddle - sell it as camping for a day or two.

mayblossominapril · 26/07/2021 06:58

If you can run with it I would. His kids may feel more a part of the move being there on moving day and seeing the disasters rather than just hearing about them! Call a taxi for your older ones, I would book it as soon as you exchange.

endofthelinefinally · 26/07/2021 07:04

8/9 yr olds will love camping. Mine would have built a fort with moving boxes and slept inside the walls.
As long as the important kitchen/ bathroom and bedding stuff is easily accessible it will be fine.
Older dc can get taxi. In the grand scheme of things a taxi fare is a drop in the ocean.

SpeakingFranglais · 26/07/2021 07:06

The older kids will be useful on moving day. It’s also a bonding experience.

Hire an extra car or budget for a taxi for the older ones. You can make it work 💐

Roselilly36 · 26/07/2021 07:14

We moved at the beginning of the year, it was a really stressful day for us, not fun at all. We didn’t even get the keys to our new home until gone 4pm. Personally, I would try to move the day, however the chain will be very pissed off about it and may not agree. Or change the week you have the kids assuming that is doable. Children that age won’t understand, why you are stressed, and house isn’t yet a home. Unpacking takes time, it was bad enough for us and our kids are young adults. You won’t want kids under your feet. Good luck, I hope the move turns out well for you.

greenzeppelin · 26/07/2021 07:17

Premier Inn for the first night.

Taxi for older kids.

Thisisanartattack · 26/07/2021 07:22

The main thing I would be wary of with DC to think of is the risk of anything going wrong on the day with completion as you don’t really want to be homeless over the weekend. How many are in the chain? On my last purchase I was at the top and the funds didn’t clear in time to get the keys due to delays with my buyer, I had to get them Monday morning. I would possibly book hotels as a back up.

33feethighandrising · 26/07/2021 07:24

You need help from the adult kids! Find out where the nearest park / soft play if raining / cafes are to the new place, and give the adult DC who gets on best with the younger ones some cash and the job of keeping the youngest out of the way while you move.

Have you hired removal people? What time of day will your DP be gone and what the do you have to hand keys over / be at the new place?

cookiesandcreamm · 26/07/2021 07:26

Taxi for the older kids.
Try and make a night of it on the first night, set up 'camp' get a take away, board games for the kids etc.
It's not an ideal situation but you can deffo run with it and make it fun.
You will laugh about it later on!

Original poster

SlimBoyFat · 26/07/2021 07:45

Thanks all - you are making me feel slightly better!

Movers are booked for that Thursday - they are packing and moving on the same day so I think it will be a long day. Dp needs to get his kids in the morning so he'll probably be gone 9-12 I would have thought. Good idea about getting the bigger kids to go ahead while we stay in old place.

Yes I'm worried about something going wrong - more so because of the dog! Dog is booked at daycare on Thursday so fingers crossed, if there's an issue, at least he isn't going to notice!

If we have to stay a night somewhere unexpectedly I think that will be tricky with 5 dc and the dog but let's hope it doesn't come to that!

OP posts:

Magstermay · 26/07/2021 09:58

Book the dog in kennels for a night just in case, refundable Premier Inn booking (cancel if not needed) and hire a big car for the day to transport kids and stuff.
You don’t have to leave the dog in kennels if all goes well but at least it’s there if you need it.

Thisisanartattack · 26/07/2021 10:04

I would 100% put the dog in kennels regardless, we put our cats in the cattery for a few days and meant we didn’t need to worry about them running off or being stuck in the car if there were delays.

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