Huge moving regrets

[Snorkers]

Urgh help.
We lived in a big hoyse in a beautiful place but had overstretched ourselves on both the size of the property and the cost.
last year we sold to a local family and to help their elderly family move before Christmas we ended up renting in some dire rural holiday let for 4 months during winter lockdown whilst searching for something. After turning down a lovely place that was out of our budget we bought in a local town near to where we moved from.
I hate it. We were desperate and if we hadn't bought everything would have gone up 30k while we were renting. I wanted a quiet road, it's really busy, I wanted character, it's got none. Couple of the neighbours are aggressive and noisy. There's a small industrial estate nearby with drilling going on all day (all shut when we viewed). There's no sense of community here it's just a commuter dormitory town. The garden is crap, overlooked and noisy. I miss where we were so much but houses are not even coming to market there before being sold.
I know we have to be patient and have friends there looking out for anyone selling but I wish we'd never moved now and just worked harder. I can't stop crying about what we've lost and how stupid we were to rush into this. If nothing comes up by Sept would you just market the house anyway?
I'm suffocating here.
Please tell me your happy come back stories from a mistake move!!

Aue Snorkers, I'm sorry,that sounds rubbish.

This sounds awful. I rushed into buying our last house and because of the neighbors it was horrendous. I sold at a loss and I'm now renting a nice apartment in a decent sub division.

I'm finally processing everything. If you are so unhappy I would sell as soon as you can.

If you’re really unhappy, cut your losses and start again. Draw up a list of good places to live and see what you can get for your budget. If they’re worse than where you are, then you may have to settle. It was the right move for you at the time-if you were still living there you might be stressing still about the cost. We realised it was hard to find what we liked on our budget in our old town so expanded our search area and are now in a lovely house in a great village. We would never reassessed things unless we had to, so maybe it’s a chance for you to assess where you’d really like to live and the lifestyle you want and how to achieve that.

Ah I really feel for you. I’m not in the same position, but like you I too am suffocating and desperately unhappy mid house move. Nothing to give but a virtual hug 💐 x

That sounds so sad, sorry to hear it. You were sensible not to overstretch yourselves again, and I think you have to build on that, accepting that these beautiful places you loved were out of reach for you and resetting the parameters of your search so that there's something in between the big house in a lovely spot and what you have currently that sounds like everything you don't want. It sounds like there will have to be some compromises, and I could live with the lack of character and overlooked garden, but the place itself sounds wrong for you if there's no community and it leaves you cold. Could you cast your net wider to find the right place but settle for a smaller property that might still lack character? You'll have different compromises to those I'd make, but at least now you have the comparison to know what truly matters to you and some breathing space to take your time and find the right next home. As unpleasant as your current circumstances are, if you see them as temporary, they might be more bearable and they're certainly better than the expensive holiday let and getting priced out. So rather than wanting to leave in a hurry, which will only lead to frustration and more upset in this market, perhaps step back if you can and make a slightly longer term plan and hopefully knowing that in a couple of years you'll be in the right place for your mind and your pocket will help a lot.

At the moment OP you are setting yourself up for failure by only considering properties outside your budget, like your old house and one that was over budget (and if it was over budget it was never an option yet you describe 'turning it down'!)

Focus on the future possibilities, if you want to move again only look at properties in your price range. I'd expect to compromise on some points and try not to label properties and/or areas as either 'perfect' or 'unsuitable' as rigid thinking makes the search a bit more difficult.

What has made this unbearable for you now OP, is there something else going on at the same time? I can completely understand wanting to feel comfortable in your own home, but sometimes we can blame one thing when it's not really that.

I feel your pain.

Moved into the wrong house out of panic, was stuck there for 4 years, sold for a profit which helped but it affected me awfully living somewhere I hated.

I echo PP - can you move again?

Hand hold OP, you sound really upset.

How long have you lived in the new house? Moving is really unsettling, and if I read your post correctly you have moved from your house to a holiday let & then again into the house. That’s a lot of adjustment.

Try to think back, to when you viewed the house you must have liked it found some positives then. What steps can you take to make your garden more private? And what can you do to make the house feel more like home, and add characters.

It’s takes time to settle somewhere new. Hopefully you will feel more positive in a few months. You can’t move back in time OP, only forward.

Best wishes for the future