Please talk me out of buying this beautiful apartment

[Nstarr]

Myself, partner, plus 2 under 2. Kids need a garden right? So please talk us out of buying this absolutely stunning apartment.

-new build with loads of character and history.
-high ceilings, huge windows, spacious rooms
-luxury very high end finish similar to a 5* hotel, very much our style.
-‘Good’ local school

BUT

Maintenance fees of £1700 a year, slightly further from family moving from Surrey to Hampshire, no garden!!!

There may be plots next year with small gardens, we’re not in a rush. It’s generally just not practical. We could easily afford the 2 beds. The 3 beds are same price of a house. But a house would take £££££’s to get to that standard. Please talk us out of this ridiculous idea.

The maintenance fee might be well worth it

But do you have experience of being shit freezing, like it's colder inside than out, while your heating happily hangs out at the top of your high ceiling? It's miserable.

And when the heating breaks down, you're looking at -2 indoors.

You already know this is wrong. Outdoor space should be non negotiable with two little ones.

Unless there is an awesome shared space outside, I wouldn’t have a flat with kids if I had a choice of homes. A garden is such a massive bonus. Last year during lockdown, being able around to run outside was so important to my kids. Your kids would miss out on paddling pool afternoons on hot days, bbqs and birthday tea parties in the garden, camping out overnight in the garden. I’d even miss the trampoline (our kids love their trampoline).

As a parent I love having the space to hang washing out on the line outside. I would genuinely miss that in a flat. And where will you keep the buggies, The bikes, skateboards, tricycles, scooters, footballs, inline skates, hoverboards, or whatever it is they like doing?

Also with small kids, is a 5* hotel finish really practical? When they want to sellotape their latest work of art to your beautiful kitchen cabinets. Or when they push their toy cars up your lovely wallpaper (I remember the day our dd age 7 threw one of those slime balls at our freshly painted wall, left a huge mark, had to repaint!). Even the best behaved kids have accidents and damage things. Beautiful homes are easier with older kids.

I think you'll really regret not having a private garden where small kids can play out safely and unsupervised . For your own sake as adults. For theirs as children.

Don't go down the route of "well if it doesn't work out we can always sell it". I think properties with no garden may be harder to sell in future. Now ALL ages and kinds of people know how important it is to have a little space to sit out in the sun, dry the washing, potter with plants, let the dog have a pee, park a bike. etc.

Covid is not going away, and that means we may face lockdowns in future.

The management FEES are neither here nor there; the issue there. is having to live with the loss of autonomy. Communal rules and regulations decided by a manager, a residents committee, and (in particular) other residents who don't have children

Those fees are cheap - my 2 bed 1st flat is £1000 a quarter - £4000 a year.
I don't have a garden or children, but plenty of children are around and we have lovely outdoor space which children play in lots - they just have to be supervised as its near water.
What floor is it? Is there a lift? How new is the new build? Are there going to be unforeseen issues with it?

Your kids will trash it. You will be so upset because it was originally so beautiful.

Your neighbours will complain about your kids. Noise travels in flats. You will find yourself hissing at them to keep quiet when they're just playing normally.

Imo kids play longer by themselves outside than inside. A safe, enclosed garden was a priority when we bought our house. I can't begin to tell you how much use we have got out of our (admittedly tiny) garden. My 3yo was out in the paddling pool yesterday making a ramp for their cars to go into the water and mixing garden dirt into it to make a 'mud bath' which they then sat in and stirred for ages. We have a tuff tray out there for play doh and painting (never do it inside), a tiny mud kitchen attached to the wall, a wall basket ball hoop and a mini slide. All of these things have had hours of use (much more than any indoor toys). Unless you're willing to spend hours mooching around in parks while your DC roll in dirt and make fairy houses, a garden is invaluable if you have the option.

A home with insufficient storage never looks tidy. Yes, most of us could do with having a clear-out but there's a bare minimum of bikes, scooters, suitcases, Christmas decorations etc. that you need to store and then there's a few 'nice to haves' like art and craft stuff for the kids.

Wait for garden 100% We've only had a really useable garden for the last few months and I can't begin to tell you how much difference it has made to all of us. It's like having another room that the kids have complete freedom in. I feel a genuine guilt we didn't manage it sooner.

No fucking way! A flat is a shit option at the best of times, they suck to live in, but with little kids? NO.

How practical is a 5* luxury high end hotel finish set up with two under 2's going to be? They aren't going to stay this age.

Wait for a garden.

I really want to see the apartment!

I'm going to talk you out of it, unless you have ever lived in a "shared accommodation" situation before. Its a challenge with lots of other people with different standards to yours and committees and rules you never thought of and also things other people do that may drive you round the bend. Add to that a couple of DC and you will be constantly having to keep them quiet and feeling on edge.

I think the apartment sounds really nice... I think kids can grow up perfectly well in homes without gardens. So many gardens are an eyesore because people don't have the time or knowledge to are for them properly. And kids would track muck in from the garden.

Our garden saved our sanity over lockdown . (My kids are older though)

Also small children trash places. Don't do it.

5* with little kids won’t last long without an awful lot of time and cleaning - not worth it when the time could be spent on the kids.

Not outside space would be a no, kids need fresh air and space to run around - tires them out for an afternoon nap.

You need the garden if you possibly can with kids - I’d go for the most space you can afford even if you need to do it up when the kids are old enough not to wreck the high end finish

I don't know but how does a new build have a lot of history?

Things that make your life easier with children.
Garden, Off Street Parking, Utility Room & Garage!

I've lived in a flat with children their whole life. It's fine if there are no other options - it's a third cheaper than a house and close to London. But if you can afford a house then go for a house.

It's less the kids who need a garden, it's YOU!

You can take kids to the park as much as someone else leaves theirs in the garden - but it means they can get on with things, whilst you are just sitting around doing nothing, waiting.

Others will be playing in the garden while their mum get on with laundry, diner etc.. and then have time for days out.

Frankly, it's the maintenance that would put me off in your case.

I had 2 under 2 in a beautiful flat in London. Top floor, no lift, I did love it. But moving to a house with garden gave me so much free time, and the relief of not having to think about your noise and the neighbours noise.

So many gardens are an eyesore because people don't have the time or knowledge to are for them properly.

Yes but the kids still love them even if they're messy...We had friends growing up who had a tip of a garden with lots of junk including an old sofa and a broken down motorbike. We used to love playing there.

Just FYI the £1700 maintenance fees they are quoting will be a conservative estimate - in reality they are probably quite a bit higher than that.

@osbertthesyrianhamster

No fucking way! A flat is a shit option at the best of times, they suck to live in, but with little kids? NO.

bit excessive, I had flats, I loved my flats! I loved my flat with kids too!

But a detached house with garden does make life easier, it's also true.

Don't do it.

Both myself and a friend separately live somewhere similar. New but in old conversions.

The service charge will go up. There seems to be some con where it's seems ok but goes up as the management of these places is always undervalued and shoddy.

And not matter how nice and hotel like it looks now, it will not stay that way.

I bought an amazing apartment with no private outside space. I still love it as much now as when I bought it 15 years ago. I have the village green opposite and loads of places to walk. My son used to play in the green or go to the football pitch. No problem at all.

"-luxury very high end finish similar to a 5* hotel,"

Reminds me of a weekend we once spent (with our numerous toddlers) at an upmarket time-share resort . The draw was; it was free (all we had to do was endure a two hour sales pitch), PLUS. we lived in the city and thought a rural timeshare for 6 might be highly enjoyable with a growing active family.

By the time we got to the sales pitch we already knew it wasn;t for us. The (absolutely gorgeous) top-end furnishings ( luxury leather sofas, pale carpets and tiles, white dining furniture ) were suffering from small hungry bouncy grubby children just back from the woodland trails.
The brand new sofas already bore the scars from Clarks sandals buckles, the pale carpets and tiles showed every mark, I was a nervous wreck, and frankly. none of the other wannabe customers were PLU ( people like us). We had accidentally landed on an alien social planet :-)