Is sellers remorse normal?! When does it stop?

[Sellersremorse8]

We’ve gone under offer, and aren’t planning to buy anything else for a while (staying in a family member’s empty house while we figure things out). But this morning I woke up and thought how much I love my place!

We fixed it up with the intention of selling, and to enjoy living in in the meantime, and it does look lovely. Everything is just how I like it. The garden is starting to bloom...

Now i don’t know why we’re selling! It seems crazy!

Our initial reasons were both financial (this has been a terrible year) and emotional (we don’t want to stay here forever because it isn’t big enough) but now I’m wondering if we’re making a mistake.

I’m sure that’s normal. But when does it pass?!

I think I’m your situation you don’t have anything ‘new’ to move into you so don’t have the distraction of a better or bigger house and all the things you can do to that.

@BrieAndChilli

I think I’m your situation you don’t have anything ‘new’ to move into you so don’t have the distraction of a better or bigger house and all the things you can do to that.

Yes I think that’s it! I don’t have an exciting place to go, just financial freedom (which will be a huge relief, don’t get me wrong). But I don’t love where we’re going nearly as much as I like where we are.

I also secretly hoped to always be able to keep this property and let it out one day as I knew we wouldn’t always live here. Was never a very realistic dream because of money, but still!

Sellers that's such a shame given it's mainly the money situation as to why you need to sell. I would advise you to look to the future, be optimistic, and remember you will find a new house and a new beginning eventually. Good luck.

Never a good idea to let out a property you have feelings for!!!!

Totally normal.
We sold and completed with no accepted offer on a new home
I cried leaving but I knew we had to move and we got a good offer from a motivated buyer.
Our new home is honestly great! We get a lot of compliments and objectively its nice and suits us anything bigger would be a nightmare and we struggle with cleaning and the garden as it is....But it is not what I'd envisaged...
I spent 6 months after we moved in continuing to look at places on rightmove and comparing everything to ours... 18 months on I am incredibly happy here 🤷‍♀️

I’m so glad you love it now, jackie! I feel so conflicted about it all. I want to be relieved and happy we could sell and excited about what’s next, but it isn’t that exciting.

Do want to believe life will pick up again and be good. Everything feels so hard at the moment - for so many.

It's totally normal. When I sold my house I was glad but also sad. I'd spent 13 years getting it to how I wanted it but It was too small and we needed to move on.
My new house is a work in progress and I still pine for my old house but I'm growing to love this house now some of the work is starting to complete.

We sold our last house to downsize just over three years ago and I still haven't got over it ☹️

Back in 2007 we sold a fairly large (3500 sq ft) house that was waaay too large after DS had gone to uni and since then we've been gradually downsizing more and more. Each time we bought a characterful project property that was in need of loads of love so I had something to focus on/some features I loved, even though the houses themselves were smaller.

This last time was different - firstly we only started on the project and didn't get much further than removing acres of woodchip and replastering/painting/garden landscaping. Mostly because although the house was stunning, we didn't feel as though we were settling in the (new to us) area.

So we sold it - made a loss to get rid quickly - and bought our current 400 year old detached cottage. Sadly, this was a repossession, too small really, with little or no character features left, whereas our last place was a detached, decent sized, Arts and Crafts style (my favourite architectural period).

It doesn't help that the truly lovely person we sold to is reasonably well known, with a prominent online presence/Instagram account and I made the massive mistake of following her, seeing all the changes she's made that we had hoped to do ourselves 😕

Although we're gradually making the cottage gorgeous - and it has a huge garden/only a couple of neighbours which is great - it will never be able to compete with what I now realise was my dream home.....

Hopefully you'll find somewhere better than your current home, @Sellersremorse8 and will move on with your life unlike me who seems to be stuck in a downward spiral of depression right now.

@Hebeee

That's a bit sad, but maybe if you had stayed you wouldn't ever have settled in the area?

Your cottage sounds fabulous, 400 years old. I'd love that.

@Sellersremorse8. Do you think that part of it is feeling like you're taking a backwards step? From owning your own house to moving into a family members house? I don't want to pry, but how long can you live there and can you redecorate etc? As things are currently, could you afford the mortgage if you stayed in your house?

@LatteLoverLovesLattes I know....I'm a sad sod, lol! And you're right, of course, we may never have settled there....

Being in a much smaller house during lockdown though - even a 400 year old one (although honestly you'd never know it was that old apart from the stone exterior!) - has cemented my feelings that sometimes size does trump location 🙄

@Hebeee

Trust me, I understand! I bought a flat to flip, Ive had to do lockdown in a shoe box with no garden! Currently no end in sight! House prices are increasing stupidly around here, whilst this place really won't much. And yes, I could move, but my job is here and it's not a good time to be looking for a a new one (especially in my mid 50's)

Still, my consoling thought is that I'm lucky really, it's mine & the mortgage is affordable (and there's only me here).