Done lots of work on house - but now want to move?!

[missbunnyrabbit]

My head is in a mess!
I have lived in a little Victorian terrace for about 1.5 years now. I paid full asking price but quickly realised it actually needed a lot doing! My parents are great DIYers and have helped me do a lot in the house, including gutting the kitchen and installing a new one that I just love! I love everything we are doing to the house. I thought I would stay here for years and years and years. Also, I LOVE the location, it's perfect for everything.

BUT. I have slowly realised that I hate my yard. Moreso, that I hate the 3 floor high terraces that are at the back of my house. My house is on a steep slope, so have to go down steps to my yard. Both of these things together mean my yard feels like it's at the bottom of a pit. I feel caged in.

There are some other very similar terraces nearby. Same style. Almost as good location (not quite tho). BUT. They have loooooooooong proper gardens, so long that the houses behind are far away! I could afford a run down one of these houses now, or I could get a more done up one in a few years. I would LOVE this, I'd love the view and I'd love a proper garden to spend time in. And most of all, I'd love to feel like I have some space!!!

Another thing is that I want a loft conversion for a third bedroom. In either house, this would give me a lovely view of the city, which might make my current house feel less caged in? But is there any point in doing yet MORE work if I'm going to move? A lot of those other terraces already have a loft conversion done.

And if I move... in say 4 years... I suppose I would have gotten a lot of life out of living in this lovely house, but that's also 4 years that I've spent with a yard that deeply unsatisfies me, and 4 years that I haven't been able to look out of my window at a lovely long garden, instead of the back of someone else's house. I'd be 'making do', 'putting up with it' ... and you only get one life. :(

But I love my current house. I feel so distressed that I am suddenly desperate to move, and the one thing I hate about it is something I can't do change at all!!! I feel so guilty for all the work my parents have done. It's really messing with my head. I feel so bad about it.

I don't know what this thread is for, I just needed to get these thoughts out.:( Anyone been similar, done loads of work on a house only to realise it's really lacking something important? What do you do?

Thanks again for the replies :)

I have got loads of big plants around my garden - I have Leylandii growing and Eucalyptus, also have trellises with ivy and things growing on them. So that's something, at least. Though they're still small.....

@JackieWeaverFever, very good question. I've been looking at houses for my boyfriend, who wants a garden, and found myself very attracted to houses that weren't overlooked. Then I suddenly started noticing how trapped my own yard is. This past week (probably because I've been on holiday with nothing to do) I've just become obsessed with it. It has never bothered me before. Just since I've seen these other houses and what I 'could' have ... I am now desperate for...

Move. ASAP.

@Skysblue

With the right builder and site, a loft conversion could be done in 2 months, and in a 2-3 mid terrace property (not 4 bed or end terrace), would almost certainly make a good profit when you sell. Speak to an estate agent to value your house as is and ask them what it would be worth with a loft conversion. Then get builder quotes from somewhere like space invaders or similar. If is going to make a profit you might as well do it asap. (Just be v v careful when choosing builder!!) If no profit then I wouldn’t bother.

Re the yard I’d plan to move to a house with proper garden, I know just what you mean and nearly bought a beautiful Vic terrace before realising 12 houses overlooked the tiny yard. I got a similar place in a cheaper area with stunning garden and am so glad I did.

@Skysblue

That's a really good point, if a loft conversion wouldn't add any value then there's no point doing it if I'm going to move... it would be a complete waste of money (other than the enjoyment factor).

I think you’re over reacting. It’s only looking at other places that has activated your concerns about your own. People telling you to move ASAP when you’ve been perfectly happy there for some time and love lots about the place seems a massive knee jerk reaction to me. Try to put it out of your mind for a while and get on with life. If you still feel the same way in a year, maybe it’s worth giving some thought to.
But like many of these things it may just float away over time once helping your boyfriend search for a place is over.

By the way, how old are you? You sound a little immature about the situation.

Before you do anything drastic there is a programme on bbc iPlayer called Your garden made perfect. They do some amazing garden transformations. It might inspire you to consider what would be possible in your garden. There is one in Manchester where they are completely overlooked and one where they built a garden in a 2m deep swimming pool as the two episodes that would be most relevant for your garden.

When you add up the full financial cost of moving (not to mention the upset to your parents) you would be able to get something amazing landscaped for that.

I totally understand your problem, I felt like this on our last house that we did SO much work on, both paid for and DIY. But our garden was so little and we just peered into the houses our garden backed onto, too, as their gardens were short. I felt so hemmed in. I never saw a sunset or sunrise from our house and hardly ever saw a rainbow, it was so depressing. I think you need to do what's right for you. If your garden is super important then see if the finances add up for you.

I think you need to get proper advice on the yard. You mention Leylandi and eucalyptus but they are real garden thugs, quick growing, spa e hungryand light blocking. ( I love the look of eucalyptus leaves and bark but you’d have to be canny on pruning and I wouldnt choose for restricted space). For a yard flatter creepers would green things without taking up space and blocking light. If seeing no green when you look out the back would some fern or grass based windowsill planters be an option? You can do lots with planters www.livingetc.com/news/how-to-make-a-small-garden-into-a-flower-haven-with-arthur-parkinsons-expert-advice

It could be a knee jerk reaction due to viewing nicer gardens recently, which may pass... but it may also not go away and get worse!

Personally I'd sit down and look at your finances first. Work out if the stamp duty and moving fees are going to mean you can't afford a suitable house in the area you want. Consider getting your house valued, if you think you may have added a lot to the price. As others have mentioned, consider your parents may not be as willing to help - labour is expensive! Although I expect they probably will when it comes to it

When you're armed with all the facts you can then make an informed choice and hopefully things will be clearer.

Personally I wouldn't do any major works before you've decided 100% to stay, unless you are going to make a hefty profit. A balcony might not be allowed in a terrace, and I really can't see how having a view out of your bedroom window is something that's going to help with your hemmed in and garden issue.

Good luck!

Thanks all. I'm feeling a little calmer today. Yes i'm quite an immature person, but more just very ocd and perfectionist!

Iwent with Eucalyptus and leylandi because they are fast growing... though they're not growing as fast as I'd like!

I'm feeling more positive, I had so many plans for this house and I'm trying to remember why I loved it. My next door neighbour was showing me pictures last night of her loft conversion and the view, and it's gorgeous.

I'm hoping that if I can get my plants to grow nice and big to hide the houses at the back (and then hang pretty fairy lights on them!), it will make me feel happier about the garden issue.

And if i can solve that, then I would feel I could stay and i could get my loft conversion to get the view, and all that makes me feel very happy that I could stay here after all.

I just need to get these plants growing and get my yard decked!!