Master bedroom on 2nd floor?

[PompomDahlia]

DH and I are planning on ttc for first baby next year and so we're moving out of our impractical flat and looking at family homes. We're looking around SW20, so Wimbledon area. A lot of the houses there have the biggest bedroom and ensuite on the second floor, separate from the other bedrooms. Would this be a no-no if you have small children?

I'm thinking of kids waking up scared at night, or needing to do night feeds/changes. We could have a bedroom on the first floor with kids, but then we wouldn't have an ensuite and tbh we've been very spoilt with having an ensuite up until now so I would miss it!

Yes I think it is a cause for concern with babies and young children but would tend to happen with a townhouse style. I also would not like having the kitchen on a different floor to the lounge which sometimes also happens.

I wouldn't have wanted to be on the floor above when I had small children. Being below would bother me less for some reason.

We have this set up (we added a loft conversion with a master bedroom / en-suite between DC1 and DC2).

With DC1 he was moved out of our bedroom at 6 months and into the nursery (box room) next door.

In contrast DC2 stayed in a cot in our room much longer - he was about 18 months and largely sleeping through by the time we moved him into the nursery downstairs. It worked fine. Both DC now come upstairs in the night if they wake up and need us - we leave landing light on the first floor which gives them enough light to see their way upstairs.

We have a converted attic so the ensuite bedroom is on the second floor. We sleep on the first floor with the DC. I like having a guest room up on a separate floor to everyone else and now we're WFH it's been good to have a quiet office away from all the homeschooling. I'm not keen on en suites anyway, I think they are much more useful for guest rooms than main bedrooms. Is it really such a hardship to walk a few steps from your bedroom door to the bathroom door in your own house?

Sorry not sure how clear that was - when DC1 moved out into nursery master bedroom was on first floor. So my point was that having master bedroom in loft room on meant we had DC2 in with us until we didn’t have to do regular night feeds/wakings and traipse up and down stairs.

We've got this set up now and it's totally fine: master and ensuite on top floor, two beds and a bath middle floor.
Our DD is nearly 3 now, she was in our bedroom for 6 or 7 months then moved her downstairs. We just made sure we had a really good video baby monitor and then it never really bothered me being on different floors.

HOWEVER: we had a break in a few months ago, they only grabbed the car keys downstairs then drove off, DD didn't wake up at all, but it SHIT ME UP that she was closer to the front door than we were.
I didn't sleep properly again until we had a new front door/cctv/a new alarm system. I had to sleep on that floor/in her room for about a week because it really freaked me out. But with security it's been fine again.

Useful feedback, thanks.

@Bubbinsmakesthree good to hear it works for you.

@dotoallasyouwouldbedoneby I definitely wouldn't go for a kitchen and living room on different floors, it would drive me mad. We're looking at 1930s or Victorians rather than modern townhouses for that reason.

@JaninaDuszejko It is nice to have a self contained guest room upstairs. However we are thinking of our parents coming to stay and MIL especially isn't great with stairs so that would put us off a 2nd floor guest room. Don't want to go into TMI but I really like having my own loo in an ensuite! I'm sure I would get used to a shared bathroom but it's not quite as convenient having to fumble for glasses etc in the middle of the night.

The house we like has enough bedrooms on the 1st floor for guest, nursery and potential master. The top floor could make a nice office though.

I viewed a lot of houses like this and DH and I were always of the view that the top room would be the guest room and we'd be on the floor below. I only have one DC and at three she's still not a great sleeper, so wouldn't want to be on a different floor to her. I must say though I'm not a big fan of en suites unless the attached bedroom is enormous, so that aspect wouldn't bother me.

That sounds horrible harper .

With making the switch from a flat to detached/semi, security had definitely been on my mind so we will have a really good set up with CCTV, alarms etc.

But now you've made me think of other issues I hadn't really thought about. Videos might be the way to go. We plan on staying in the house for up to 10 years, so whilst kids are primary aged.

I wouldnt mind two bedrooms upstairs (which is what we are doing at the minute). While the kids are younger they are happy to share the second room upstairs together. When they are older and want their own space they can move down then. When they are old enough to want their own room then I wont be worried about them as they should be a decent age by then.

My friend kept her baby in their room (top floor) and didn't move the baby to her own room on the middle floor until she was 1 and it wasn't an issue.

Reading harpers post, what would also be useful for babies/toddlers is the baby monitor with video and movement sensor, so if baby/toddler moves from the cot you are alerted.

My house has this set up - I really like having my own floor. When children were small we had a video monitor and used it for longer than we probably would have if we were in the next room. All the neighbours who have the same layout like it too, I've never heard any complaints.

A friend's house has the master suite on the middle floor and the children above. She always says mine is better as I don't have noise of children/elephants running around above me!

We have this set up. We're on the second floor and DCS (2yo & 1yo) are on the first floor. I was an bit anxious when we first moved them down but it's fine. We have good video monitors and the house isn't that big so we hear them easily. DC2 is up a bit in the night still so it's a bit of a pain going up and down the stairs but not really a bit deal in the grand scheme of things.

I suspect it's different if you have older kids vs newborn-preschool sort of age. We have this set up in our townhouse. My DH is literally unphased by being on a different floor to our son, I meanwhile hate it. It's one factor that's led to us moving now as I'm pregnant with our second child and have been very vocal in how much I dislike the different bedroom floor situation. I think for me it's mostly an emotional reaction of wanting to be close to my child, but it's also practical too: I hated having to go down 2 sets of stairs multiple times to get milk in the night, then up to the 1st floor to DS and then back up another set of stairs to our bedroom. It also means that despite DS being 3.5 we still have to use an audio monitor at night as my DH doesn't hear him wake and I'm paranoid that I wouldn't. Another consideration is that we've had to put a stairgate on DS' bedroom as the thought of him trying to wander up and down the stairs in the night gives me nightmares (you'd have this anywhere but again given he's on a different floor I'm not sure I'd hear him).

But for all of that as I said it literally doesn't bother my DH at all! 😂🤦🏻‍♀️