Honest opinions of Grays, Essex

[hopefully2021]

Hi,
Just looking for some honest opinions please - me and my husband are currently buying our first home and will be moving from Hackney in East London - our chosen areas are Aveley, South Ockendon and Chafford Hundred (due to our budget - you seem to get the most for your money in those areas), however I've seen a few really nice houses in Grays. I was always under the impression that Grays was a bit rough but would value some advice from people who currently live there or have recently lived there (and why you decided to move)
Many thanks!

The racist thing works both ways, I remember a lot if African shops opened in grays with no whites on their doors. Its not all one way

I lived in grays for 30 odd years

@UncomfortableSilence Yoohoo fellow Hornchurcher lol!

@Magicbabywaves that's the opening bid price for an auction property though

I couldn’t agree with @JackieWeaverRules more. Overwhelmingly people are telling you it is not a nice area. Really it isn’t. You are being unrealistic if you think you will only stay in your own home with visitors or travel into London for leisure activities. Are you planning to have a child? You need to consider their schools, social activities etc. I would choose location over size every single time. We moved back into London from a large 3 bed in Chafford (bought ore children!) to a 3 bedroom flat where we ended up with three children in the end and no garden. I wouldn’t go back for anything. My eldest who was born in Chafford spent his first first few years growing up in Lakeside. There was literally nothing else to do with him. The pull of a specious house is strong but the reality of giving up on location to achieve it is just not worth it.

Op over here !! I was in a similar boat to you 5 years ago! Lived in Hackney and worked extremely hard to save our deposit to buy our first home - couldn't afford Hackney due to being way beyond our budget ! We looked at Chesthunt and broxbourne - both areas I loved but always a bit too over budget .
We eventually bought in Collier Row and I haven't had any regrets since ! My dh needed to return to east London frequently as his parents live there so we chose somewhere which is about 30mins drive, good enough schools and not too far from central hubs .You can look at Collier Row, Harold Wood , Hornchurch , Billericay as a start . These are areas I'd happily consider . Ignore Upminster if your budget is £350k! All the best x

Also op I forgot to mention that the crime rate in Grays is relatively high so I would best avoid but if it's the only affordable place for you to get unto the ladder then why not ! Just be warned and be prepared to make it temporary .Also I don't think Grays is as close to east London as you think - I'm closer in to London and it takes me the best part of 35mins to get to Hackney ! North of Ockendon is meant to be better than south but pricey as hell so not helpful ! I would pick south over Grays just due to crime rate but Grays do have nicer houses. I have a friend who moved from Barking to Grays and they seem happy . Their area does seem very nice and quiet and they seem happy with their daughters school.

I think it’s interesting you’ve opened up a second thread on this OP! I’m going to agree with @JackieWeaverRules that this exercise hasn’t really been about hearing different opinions but hearing what you want to hear. Overwhelmingly the PP on here have said don’t do it and look elsewhere - for me that would be enough to give it a huge swerve! It’s obviously your life though and I imagine it’s where you will buy which is of course your prerogative.

@SJaneS49 your so wrong I don't know how many times I keep saying this just trying to get a balanced view - there has been some exaggeration which I know as I'm not completely new to those areas
We have also been looking around romford and areas surrounding epping forest and Brentwood, I suggested Stanford Le Hope to which someone on here practically laughed at me so I'm trying but some of you do sound quite patronising if I'm honest
It's a very stressful decision and we have a pretty tight criteria (and budget) and we also don't have bank of mum and dad like alot of others to take the stress away from us and buy us our dream house in a dream area
If anything you have all put me off from even viewing any properties around the whole of Thurrock!

@cherry2727 thank you, thats really helpful I've been looking around Romford which can get us a few houses in our budget but most need work but we do think the area would be a good choice - just waiting for the right house to come up and jump out at us now Thank you for coming on and not being completely negative xx

@Wiifitmama I completely agree I'm just trying to weigh up if where ever we go will be safer than Hackney, young boys regularly try to start on my husband (last night for instance just popping to the shop) - there are a lot of cases of mistaken identity around here where innocent people are often stabbed - hence why we have quite a big dog (partly protection and guards my husband's business aswell as being a great family dog - big & soppy but looks scary)
I really don't mean to come across as being arrogant if that's how it seems, it's just a hard decision to make!
But anyway I think I am going to stop replying on this thread as it's just stressing me out, I take all your opinions on board so thanks everyone

With all due respect OP, you’ve mentioned the bank of muck and sad thing a few times of course there are people out there who do get help but there are millions that don’t. 350k is a great budget in the right area and it’s a case of working out what you are prepared to compromise on.
To throw another area into the mix, I lived in Benfleet for 8 years and you get fast trains on the c2c line for there and it’s well positioned for the a13 and a127.

Hi @hopefully2021 no opinions of Grays but had a snoop as always interested in out of London options in case DH and I decide to move. Have you considered somewhere like Cheshunt (oyster zone 8) on the Essex/ Hertfordshire boarder? DH used to live there before we moved in together and although not a lot going on compared to London, it seemed like a family orientated place and also has a direct train to Bethnal Green. Never felt unsafe when I visited. You can get a 3 bed house for 350 as well and there is lots of countryside on your doorstep. Might be a good option

I agree with @Clickncollect that comments about the bank of Mum and Dad, people being handed things are off and just going to put people’s backs up. Personally my parents did give me a deposit towards my first flat in a grotty South London suburb when I was 23 years old, unmarried and pregnant, I still had to pay the mortgage on it though as a full time working single parent who received no child support from my ex DP, money from the State or money from my parents (which I wouldn’t take). Pretty sure I won’t be the only one who has worked bloody hard and made sacrifices for nice houses in nice areas!

I’m out too.

@hopefully2021 I think people have been exaggerating on this thread. I used to work in Grays until recently and know people who live there.
Of course it's not the dream place to live but it's not all that bad. I had to laugh about not walking alone near the station - I used to walk there all the time to catch the train (sometimes in the dark ).

I think asking on mn is giving you skewed replies and there is a certain amount of snobbery on here. If a town doesn't have a Waitrose or a quaint coffee shop it's a no go area.
The people who live in that area are 'salt of the earth' types, they're a bit rough and ready around the edges but they're the type who would do anything for you.
I would far rather live in Grays than Romford, Basildon (some parts not all) or inner London.

Go and see for yourself OP. Good luck.

My goodness if that's what hackney is like you should leave immediately. Sounds awful.

OP did you ever visit? What did you make of Greys?

I know this thread is getting old, but someone on another thread has just been linked to this one as they are in a similar dilemma/similar area.

For me - the problem with Greys is how insular it is. It's deprived, but not in pockets - like Hackney, but just blanket deprivation (like a crap seaside town) with ugly housing and depressing shops, but it is the insular attitude of most people there that mean I couldn't live there. My BIL lived in Greys, Rainham and now Hainault. All pretty shit, but Greys was by far the worst. Every person I ever met at his house was "Im not racist but..." and small minded, UKippy and just noone I'd ever want to be friends with. I used to have to 'dumb' myself down and shut up so as not to get into arguments with people. Hated visiting.

We also recently explored these areas, looked at several properties, drove around the area, went to local supermarkets. South Ockendon was too odd for us, almost like a leftover town really didnt like the atmosphere. Grays seems ok, a mix of people, most houses we saw were commuters to london moving further into essex. I wouldnt rule grays out. In the end we quite liked Basildon, appreciate some parts are rough but the counties roads, presidents roads are near the station and nice houses, nice neighbourhoods, near station and A127. Took us 30 mins from poplar and quick train into London. However the train was expensive so we decided too expensive to travel for us (2 of us). If your partner is driving in he could drop you to oyster zone so that wouldnt be a concern for you? Alternatively theres Rainham and Dagenham. Dagenham seems to have a bad rep on MN but I know a lot of people who have lived there 15/20 years with no trouble. Also the prices have really shot up so worth the investment.

So we did visit the areas, we walked through the town centre in Grays mix of people sort of reminded me of Mare street in Hackney - didn’t feel particularly unsafe but not sure how I would have felt walking home from the station at night? Not because it’s Grays but any area as a woman I suppose you probably feel a bit on edge especially if areas are unfamiliar. We actually offered on a house in Ockendon as the house itself was lovely, very cheap and not too far from the station - however we didn’t get it. This made us change tactic and increase our budget as we realised we wanted to be closer to London near friends & family (mum has health issues) now we are currently in the process of buying a 1930s 3 bed terraced house on the outskirts of Romford at the very top end of our budget but feel that it will serve us as a nice family home for many years to come (and when we have kids) - the road it’s on is very quiet but not far from local shops etc and not many sales which tells me people tend to live there for a long time so area must be nice (our sellers have lived there for 40 years). I feel like the area is a good investment good train links and the Elizabeth line should be opening within the nice year!
But in short - I wouldn’t rule out living in Thurrock as I do think you can get a lot for your money but on second thoughts we felt that a bigger mortgage on a property closer to London would suit us better in the long run