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Greeting neighbours etiquette

21 replies

organisedmother · 05/02/2021 18:45

We are moving next week and once we have exchanged myself and my husband were going to knock on our neighbours door to introduce ourselves, we are going to wear masks. Just a quick hello on the doorstep and let them know our moving date, I started to think what if they are elderly or CEV and may not appreciate us knocking on their door in a pandemic.

I’ve never moved not really sure what is the normal procedure is, we are moving to a conservation area a small village so felt rude not to say hello?

OP posts:
NewIdeasToday · 05/02/2021 18:46

I wouldn’t bother at the moment. Just say hello when you see them out and about.

Findahouse21 · 05/02/2021 18:48

I'd put a note through the door with contact details if you want to

CoronaIsWatching · 05/02/2021 18:48

I wouldn't bother, maybe put a note through the door

Sprig1 · 05/02/2021 18:49

I wouldn't knock on the door. Just drop a card in after you have moved in (unless they come out and say hi on moving day).

JudgeRindersMinder · 05/02/2021 19:18

Wait until you’ve actually moved in

ireallyamthewalrus · 05/02/2021 19:22

I agree wait until you’ve moved in and pop a card through the door introducing yourselves.

pilates · 05/02/2021 19:51

Wait until you’ve moved in.

user1471538283 · 05/02/2021 22:13

I dont think I will ever introduce myself to neighbours again after a nightmare. I want to live anonymously.

inquietant · 05/02/2021 22:16

Not before you move in, and even then I'd wait til you see them naturally.

CheckMate2021 · 06/02/2021 00:32

We moved December, and I decided to pop round to neighbours with a box of chocolates. I tried to catch them as they came back from work, hello and handed a gift bag :) I’m glad we did (they also returned the gesture and we got some lovely biscuits and chocolates!)
However with the current lockdown situation I’d probably post a card.

BackforGood · 06/02/2021 00:43

Under usual circumstances, I've always gone round to introduce ourselves, but I think if I were moving, I'd probably leave it a week or so and try to see if can 'bump into them' on the drive or whatever, and then go and knock after that.

Mumdiva99 · 06/02/2021 00:48

If your neighbours are like ours they will be around with welcome cards and gifts before you can unpack. Even in these Covid times I would put a welcome card through the door if we got a new neighbour.

organisedmother · 06/02/2021 07:27

It’s a row of cottages and our cars are parked all down the street, so fingers cross they pop out when they hear all the commotion on moving day!

OP posts:
JorisBonson · 06/02/2021 07:30

Wow, I've never done anything like this to new neighbours! Just said hello when I've seen them.

MaryIsA · 06/02/2021 07:37

Ours left a bunch of flowers and a note with their names on on our doorstep the day we moved. Other neighbours introduced themselves when they were out and about.

LonstantonSpiceMuseum · 06/02/2021 08:11

I feel you OP, I moved last year to a completely new area so was really keen to get to know people!
I've had to make do with cursory waves across the street and also putting the odd bin out for them :)
I think if they are nice people they will understand, otherwise leaving a box of chocs or a card like PPs would be welcome too.

Rubyredroo · 06/02/2021 08:57

We exchanged before Christmas and completed after so we posted Christmas cards to them all introducing ourselves.

121hugsneeded · 06/02/2021 09:39

Oh dear, best thing you can do is try to find out where 'their ' car parking spots are, and not to park there, ( past experience of this !) so maybe if you do go down the note idea mention this!

WombatChocolate · 06/02/2021 10:24

I would avoid being what might be seen as too pushy to be honest.

Wait until you move in to do anything. On moving day, go about your business moving in and you may well find that neighbours pop out to say hello. That is the best way really. Sometimes people won’t do that on the day as they know lots is going on for you and don’t want to interrupt you. If you’re in the front garden next day or still moving stuff about, they might appear to say hello at that point.

And if you’ve been there a couple of days and been going in and out a few times, with no sign of neighbours, at that point drop a note through the door with your contact details and a brief, cheery hello.

Dont go and knock in the current climate of Covid. And definitely don’t go and knock before you’ve actually moved in.

It’s great that you’re friendly but you need to be sensitive to the fact that Covid makes people nervous and some people just aren’t into neighbourly friendship. For some, a ‘hello’ or wave when getting in the car really will be pushing it for them. People also like to feel they are able to develop contact or not on their own terms and not have it pushed on them. So be careful with the door knocking or taking stuff round. You need to be prepared to let them take the lead and be guided about the amount of contact you’ll have by them and respect that, rather than pushing yourself on them.

We had new neighbours move in just before Christmas. We had a friendly relationship with our last neighbours and would take in parcels, lend garden equipment, had the odd drink in their garden in the summer and used to chat over the fence if not in a hurry when heading out.

The new people moved in on a wet, dark afternoon when Covid restrictions were mounting. We could see them moving in from our front window and resisted going out to say hello because we knew they’d just want to get their stuff in. The next morning, they were moving stuff in and out and into their shed etc and DH was in our garden and moving stuff out to the bins. He said hello and I could hear from in the house that he was chatting to the man who had just moved in. When it had gone on for 5 mins, I popped out and said hello too. If the conversation between DH and neighbour had only been a minute or two, I wouldn’t have popped out, taking the cue from them that they didn’t want a big chat or not at that time.

Winter and Covid makes it hard. 6 weeks on, we’ve now chatted about 4 times whilst heading out for a walk. They are friendly, ask about the neighbourhood and we know where they work and about their kids. I’d imagine, that come the summer and nicer weather and less Covid restrictions, we might ask them into our garden for a drink...because I can gauge from our chats so far, that they’d be up for that. Just something low key and brief. And it won’t be a frequent thing....we want to be friendly neighbours but not great friends really.

It’s good to be friendly but not too pushy and to be willing to take your cue from them.

organisedmother · 06/02/2021 10:39

@WombatChocolate yes to be fair we are the ones moving into a new neighbourhood so would be nice if people would walk past and say hello, I’m not going to do anything the whole street will be aware the new neighbours have arrived the house has been empty 2 years!

OP posts:
gingercat02 · 06/02/2021 10:49

Our NDN left a bottle of wine and a card on the doorstep on our first morning, which we both thanked them for and they have barely spoken to us since. Think they were hoping for a similar aged family, we are at least 10 years older and so is ds than their kids.
We live in a cul-de-sac of 7 houses and we wave or say hello in passing but we see them rarely

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