I've only just joined MN and getting used to it all - so here goes;
My DH, 2 YO DD and I moved into a beautiful house just over a year ago. We have absolutely wonderful neighbours around us and there is nothing they wouldn't do for you.
In lockdown my husband and I were invited into the street by a few of them to clap for carers and get to know everyone. We often stayed outside, socially distancing, chatting for ages.
We also found out we're pregnant again and expecting another DD in 2 weeks time. So very excited!
Everything sounds idyllic, except for our neighbours next door. Upon asking our other neighbours what their deal is, we've been told they're odd, dont engage with anyone and have been nicknamed 'Fred and Rose West'! I guess there is more to it that they haven't told us.
They're so bizarre and as time has passed in lockdown we have gotten to realise how intrusive they are which is making me uncomfortable especially using our garden in nice weather. Feel uncomfortable taking my daughter and soon to be newborn out there and pray things change this year.
The first time we met them was at the start of lockdown when we were in our gardens last year. The fence was only about 3 foot high at the time so they could see us and we could see them. Both my husband and I said hello numerous times, to be blanked. At first we thought perhaps they are hard of hearing but soon realised they just didnt like to make conversation which was fine and we left it at that.
One day over the summer I was working in the garden and said hello again and was met with a hello in return. He offered to raise the height of the fence which we thought was really nice and felt it would increase privacy for both of us. Because we live on the coast we have to have split pannel fencing which has gaps in to allow for air to pass through meaning it wont take off in high winds.
So our neighbour replaced the fence for a 5ft high one which was an expense for them. We were so grateful we bought them a case of beer to say thank you.
After he put the fence up, he then started building a small raised deck about 2 foot high, big enough for one sunchair attached to the fence. We noticed it once day because his wife started sitting on a chair with the back touching the fence under a parasol which hung over our fence. I know they can do what they want in their own garden but couldnt help seeing her sitting on the fence from our kitchen window under the parasol which was clipped to the fence and over hung into our garden. We thought it was an odd place to build it.
We didnt want to cause any aggravation over it so didnt question them and thought we would increase our privacy by planting some new bushes along the fence.
One day I was working next to the fence preparing the ground for planting when my neighbour's wife came out her house and accused me of putting a camera through the fence. I couldn't believe it and was so taken aback it made me feel quite uncomfortable especially as I hadn't really spoken to her before. I politely said I wasnt and showed her the spade in my hand.
She ignored me and went back inside. Because the fence has gaps in it I knew she had seen me working so feel our privacy is being breached and is exactly the reason we want to plant some bushes in our garden along the fence.
When they do sit outside they seem to like sitting right up against it at the other end next to our kitchen window (not on the new decking he built) and with another parasol clipped to the fence.
On another occasion when we were out of lockdown we had our in laws round for dinner as they are in our bubble and they help us with childcare. One evening last year my DH, myself, my MIL, FIL and SIL were sat outside talking, enjoying a glass of wine. My SIL saw my neighbour open their window and start playing loud music to get our attention. I felt so embarrassed as we weren't playing loud music or even shouting. At this point I wanted to go back inside so we did.
Last autumn we had some landscapers in to do some works in our garden. My landscaper told me one day while he was working that my neighbour came round while I was out and came into our garden, asking what they were doing. This made me so angry because he was trespassing. When I next saw him a few days later on our drive, cutting back the bushes from his property that were overhanging our drive I approached him and politely but firmly asked him to speak me and my husband in future, rather than take it upon himself to ask our contractors what work is being done. He didnt really say anything and didnt deny it or apologise. My other neighbour opposite who saw this messaged me to say he looked really happy after I went back indoors which creeps me out.
There have been other things that have happened but I feel I've written an essay here.
I have often wondered if it's because they are in their mid 60's and my husband and I in our late 30's with children and they dont like that - but that's still no excuse!
I know it's not me, but its driving me nuts and cant help but think we should have been firmer with them about respecting our privacy from the very beginning. We dont want to make things worse, since they have clearly made it known they dont particularly like us which is fine. However my husband and I are nice people, dont want confrontation and just want to be left alone to the privacy we deserve in our home and garden. Anyone else had annoying neighbours like this and what did you do?