House buying = stress?

[turkeyburgers]

Hi, I think I just want a little reassurance it'll all be okay I'm buying my first home and have so far had issues with my solicitor and had to switch, issue with a bank, passport expired, could not renew due to covid, now waiting on HMRC letter for current address but need to send mortgage application documents for new bank off... stress... and it's a new build so completion is set to be 3 months from now... so what else is to come? And will it eventually complete? Is it stressful for everyone? So many worse things going on in the world but this is stressing me out personally... anyone who's done it before, is this all normal?

Don't they say house moves are one of the most stressful things people go through?
You're not alone

We pulled out of two potential purchases so gave up and went into rented. It has been my least enjoyable life experience to date. Truly awful.

In both attempted purchases our vendors were arse dragging liars.

It's incredibly stressful. I've cried a lot. It gets better, then worse, then better again. Just accepting it is dreadful and you have no control is the only thing that helps me tbh. I can't even think of living in the new house.

@turkeyburgers

Hi, I think I just want a little reassurance it'll all be okay I'm buying my first home and have so far had issues with my solicitor and had to switch, issue with a bank, passport expired, could not renew due to covid, now waiting on HMRC letter for current address but need to send mortgage application documents for new bank off... stress... and it's a new build so completion is set to be 3 months from now... so what else is to come? And will it eventually complete? Is it stressful for everyone? So many worse things going on in the world but this is stressing me out personally... anyone who's done it before, is this all normal?

I didn’t find it stressful as I was focussed on my newborn so DH did absolutely everything. He said it was fun and actually it was much less stressful than the previous move as there weren’t two people / sets of opinions to consider. He managed everything, created a planner, and leaned on our solicitor and estate agent (who were both stars) a lot. The most stressful part for him was the moving day itself because a close family member’s funeral was on the same day and we were rushing to get keys and go to the funeral and managing baby.

I actually found unpacking really stressful. I had everything exactly where I wanted it in the old house and finding new places and even junking things I wanted to keep was taxing.

Just be very grateful you're not in a chain!!

yes it is stressful. we had a bit of a wait for the mortgage offer as it was mid-recession and the continuation person at the estate agents rang me every day to tell me the vendor was very upset by the delay and was thinking of putting the house back on the market. There was nothing we could do to speed things up and it felt like there was no purpose to the phonecalls except to ramp up anxiety and spread it round the system.

In an attempt to be reassuring though it does fade into the background once it's done and it will be so lovely to move into your new home, I have very happy memories of picking up the keys and the first few days.

I've only bought 1 house and it was honesty the most stressful experience of my life. ID being requested again and again by the same people, having to get them certified each time, daily emails from mortgage broker and solicitors, more documents wanted, stress over finding an old P45 and bank statements galore.

It was almost like they all had a list of stuff they needed and rather than asking for it all up front they were just working their way down the list and asking for each item daily. It was a couple of years ago and I'm still not over it 😁

Good luck, you'll get there

I think moving house is considered the third most stressful experience after bereavement and divorce, it's terrible. However, a bit like child birth it fades into the background pretty quickly once you're in and unpacked. I found it useful to picture myself in my new house and how I was going to decorate, having a positive outcome in mind helped get me through the crap. You'll get there and it will be worth it to own your first home.

We are on the cusp of exchange.

Small baby. Pandemic. Two of us wfh is house that’s too small. Terminally ill relative we can’t visit.

All of the above contributing but the constant terror that something is going to go wrong with the house sale after six months of this is making me feel physically sick this moment.

Have spent the last week either on the phone to estate agents/solicitors/buyers or waiting for them to call back. The utter absurdity of the English system is insane. We’ve invested so much time and money but nothing is yet legally binding until some numpty at the other end of the chain gets their shit together and we can exchange. None of the parties seem legally able to communicate with more than one other person so it’s like a crazily expensive game of Chinese whispers.

I’ve been awake at 3am every night this week.

Just need to exchange.

I like your sentence 'until some numpty at the other end of the chain gets their shit together'. I'm waiting for my vendor's solicitor to get her shit together, all I want is an exchange date, not the moon.

We all need to remember everything will be alright in the end, and if it's not alright, it's not the end.

The stamp duty holiday is going to be a nightmare of collapsing chains if something isn't sorted. Our chain was complete last august, everyone thought no problem to finish by 31st March. Then one pulled out. New chain going again, but no one has £15k just spare sat around in case it doesn't go through on time!!

Unbelievable stressful process, slow solicitors in our chain. To be fair I know they have a huge workload at the moment & every man & his dog wants to move before 31 March, but I really can’t understand the hold ups, we are a small chain of 3, none of us require a mortgage, all paperwork is signed. We all want to move ASAP, just so bloody frustrating I am packing and just hoping it will go through, but who knows.

@Roselilly36

Unbelievable stressful process, slow solicitors in our chain. To be fair I know they have a huge workload at the moment & every man & his dog wants to move before 31 March, but I really can’t understand the hold ups, we are a small chain of 3, none of us require a mortgage, all paperwork is signed. We all want to move ASAP, just so bloody frustrating I am packing and just hoping it will go through, but who knows.

Solicitors are always slow and not proactive, that's nothing new

Yes it's awful

We moved a month ago (buying and selling) and there were so many bumps along the road it was unreal

It's like wading through treacle.

You will get there!

Yes! Buying a house is extremely stressfully, buying and selling is traumatising 😅