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Original poster

Buying a house you don’t like

70 replies

Starllyow · 22/12/2020 21:27

Is anyone else doing this? Sale is proceeding, we’re due to move end of January. We don’t really like the house it’s just practical and in the right location. If we pull out there’s not really much else on the market. Would we even sell ours again at this point, I really don’t know. Looking for some stories of this situation working out alright in the end?!

OP posts:

infinitediamonds · 24/12/2020 23:57

I dont love our house. It's our 'forever home' in that we dont ever plan to move until retirement or maybe a lottery win. By any measure its ugly and we dont have the money or DIY skills to make much improvement to it - some improvements we have paid for have gone fairly wrong, I just dont see how you take a dated house and make it modern without completely renovating all in one go. That said, it's fine. It's a house in a nice safe area and good school catchment. I would love a bigger garden but ultimately not enough to work full time until I'm 70 to pay for it.

oohyoudevilyou · 25/12/2020 21:52

I bought a house I hated when we moved from lovely semi in a v cheap area up north to NW London. It was all we could afford in the area couldn't move further out due working shifts at hospital so needed to be close. We came to love it once we'd decorated and it felt like home, and I actually cried when left it to move to the Midlands (a much nicer house) 3 years later.

december212 · 26/12/2020 08:06

I didn't love my house when I bought it (15 years ago - so you can expect that opinion changed). Every room has been redecorated how I want it to be. The house is solid, lots of storage but only just big enough for us. Neighbours are fantastic, safe area, good schools nearby and good walks & parks on our doorstep. To move to something bigger in the same area would be an extra £100k.

We did alot of decision making earlier in the year and decided that £100k would be better spent on holidays, enjoying life and just not having the burden of a bigger mortgage. And I love the house, as does my dc.

For all that you don't like the house, it does sound like a blank canvas.

ScrapThatThen · 26/12/2020 08:37

I agree with pps. Before you move in, imagine a couple of pretty things that you will bring - a picture, an ornament, a tree in a pot - and visualise the house, the items, and family life going on. Start to feel excited about the surroundings, local shops/walks/playgrounds/takeaways/your dc in the school. And when you get there throw all the windows open, clean and freshen to 'claim it', put your items in place, then warm it up and play some music. You will feel overwhelmed or doubting sometimes during the move but you have thought this through and can be confident it's a good move for you.

BasinHaircut · 26/12/2020 09:20

To give a slightly different perspective, when we viewed this house 6 years ago we both knew before we even stepped inside that it was ‘our’ home. It needed quite a bit of work (we have changed the downstairs layout/new kitchen) but we both felt like we had to live here.

We were moving for schools and to just a nicer area in general, the house was only slightly bigger than our previous one but there was no way I was raising then 20-month old DS in the area we loved before.

We had planned a loft conversion to accommodate a DC2 (who has never materialised) but other than that we have made this house exactly how we wanted it.

Now I’m completely indifferent about it. The house is fine but not really big enough. I’d move tomorrow if we could find something in the same area for schools and within a reasonable budget. However to buy even a similar but slightly bigger house with a decently sized third bedroom instead of the glorified cupboard that is ours, would at least double the amount of mortgage we would have to pay off from just under £200k to £400k+. As a pp says that money could be better spent on holidays and not working to pay a mortgage until I die.

I do often think that we get caught up in the ‘perfect’ or ‘dream’ or ‘forever’ home and lose sight of the fact that to own our own homes at all is such a privilege that offers so much more than specific room sizes, kitchen islands and bifold doors.

Sallycinnamum · 26/12/2020 09:44

I'd never buy a house I didn't love. The house we're currently in i knew the minute i walked in the door was meant to be our house. I had a real emotional feeling that it was a happy house despite the fact it was in a terrible state.

It's nothing special at all but I love our home, it really is my happy place.

As another poster said, living somewhere I didn't like would really fuck with my mental health.

Mosaic123 · 26/12/2020 09:50

You don't love your house but you love your children. You are doing the best thing for them.

Mumdiva99 · 26/12/2020 09:57

@DiesalFive you didn't love house ornthe area. The OP isnhappy with the area. It's where she currently lives.

@mosaic123 has said it perfectly. School catchment is massive.

I don't love our house. I like the inside but hate the garden- but...the kids got into the right schools. It is such a great location for them to grow up in. Since moving in we have found all the neighbours are lovely. It has worked during lockdown. (Husband and I would like to one day live near a high street etc....but I am happy in the imperfect house for now). So I guess I love our life....

sosotired1 · 26/12/2020 13:04

I also think you often don't know if a house is right (or wrong) until you actually move in and live there for a while. I have moved into somewhere that I thought would be great.... and couldn't wait to get out of there. A couple of houses ago I managed to move into what I thought was the perfect house in a street I always wanted to live in. It was great for years but then we realised (rather suddenly) we wanted to move somewhere completely different (urban to rural). I don't miss that house even though it seemed all I wanted at the time. I think the idea of a 'forever' house is a bit odd and possibly limiting when our lives can change so much over time.

Throughabushbackwards · 26/12/2020 13:36

We're in the middle of moving into a house that I don't love at all. It's a safe investment in a really nice village and it is going to save us £800 per month, though, so we'll have money for holidays and treats, so there's a definite upside. I'm telling myself that it's a short-term, 2-5 year house to make it feel like a positive thing.

user1471538283 · 26/12/2020 14:53

As long as your neighbours are quiet it will be fine. I thought I would be devastated moving from my first home but I wasnt and I loved it. I dont believe in forever homes. You and yours are forever not Bricks

RandomMess · 26/12/2020 15:38

"I'd never buy a house I don't love"

Very many of us don't have the luxury of affording to choose a house we love!! It comes down to the most suitable you can afford. A 2 bed tiny quaint terrace isn't much good if you have 4 children!

Sallycinnamum · 26/12/2020 17:24

@RandomMess actually you're completely right and that was probably a silly sweeping generalisation on my part! At least like a house a little even if you don't love it.

bigbluesea · 26/12/2020 18:18

I did 3 years ago and I still don't like it. Don't do it!! You will still feel this way once you've bought it, only then you'll be stuck in a house that will remind you every day of all the reasons you don't like it. I went through with my sale because I thought I was being practical on my very tight budget.

Sure, you can move again in a few years but it costs a lot of money to move house. Plus, I doubt the economy will bounce back by then. I'd say if you're buying now, try to get something you could be happy living in for 10-20 years. It's a buyer's market at the moment - use that to your advantage! The week I exchanged, 2 incredible flats in my budget came up for sale. I wish I had waited.

Mummyto3gorgeousgirlies · 26/12/2020 20:09

If it's not your forever house I wouldn't worry to much... when I met my OH we had both recently bought our own first homes. He let his and moved into my flat initially but his was bigger and better location so when we got married we switched and moved into his house. It was not the type of house I would ever have chosen - found layout annoying - outside unattractive - we spent little to decorate or change it over the years as we both new it was not our forever house and didn't want to waste money on it. 4 years ago we completed on our forever home, having lived years in that house. It served its purpose - got us into the school we wanted - was what we could afford at the time. We moved to a house we fell in love with but was very very dated. Lived in it for 4 years and recently moved out to do a full renovation as happy to spend money and remortgage on this one as it is the one! Good luck - def don't stress for medium term - make most of it

ReadySteadyBed · 27/12/2020 09:54

Strangely I fell in love with a mess of a house but we’ve been working on it over the past year now to renovate it (including moving the stairs!). The location was the winner and the garden.

I actually don’t like the outside of our house but I’m hoping in time we can remedy that.

planesick · 27/12/2020 12:47

We did this. Moved to better town, bought the house we could afford with a view to saving a deposit for a larger mortgage in two years... Then covid struck, furlough followed and now we are stuck here forever because we were able to keep everything going during the crisis. It totally makes sense, we would have lost our house with a bigger mortgage, but I hate the house. Hate it with a passion 😢 I totally understand why we won't move, if something like this year happens again we are safe, but it still isn't where I wanted to be!
Good luck

Fungster · 27/12/2020 12:53

Our last home I hated. Hated. I didn't like the "vibe" from day one, but DH loved it. We lived there for 5 years and I was miserable. However we made some money and through a neighbor I got my current job (which I love!) so I can see the benefits.

Our current house I love - however we are in the city and between riding crime and struggling schools, we've decided to move out to the suburbs. Better schools, lower crime, bigger houses. I'm not actually that concerned about the house we'll find - as long as we're in the right school district I'm fine with it. This will be our house for the next 10 years, until our youngest heads off to college. After that we'll likely downsize and move back to the city.

I think not loving a house is fine, but listen to your gut if you're getting a bad feeling.

SatishTheCat · 27/12/2020 12:55

We did this, and now almost ten years on, we love it. It isn’t perfect, which is to do with the aspect, but I have done lots of work on the garden to make it really beautiful and made it into a functional outdoor space. We’ve also used our imaginations to make the very best use of the spaces inside, and used colours and patterns we really love for soft furnishings that we could take with us should we move again. And we got a rescue cat! It’s really fine, and we will stay now for the foreseeable future, but if you want to just see the house as a stopgap, that’s fine too.

olympicsrock · 27/12/2020 13:26

We have lived in a house for 10 years that I initially refused to look round. Not pretty, on a main road, garden not big, on corner with new build estate.
Then price dropped and I looked round. Great location and big rooms, money for renovation. We turned it into a fab house and I love it now.

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