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Moving back to the UK
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Roxysoxmum · 18/11/2020 16:01

Hi looking for insight into house prices and good places to live. I’m moving back to the U.K. as my 87 year old mother has dementia and although not bad yet, she can no longer live on her own. I know that long term I cannot manage her permanently on my own so thinking of moving back to the U.K. as there will be more support from family there. The problem I have is where to live? I am retired so luckily don’t need to commute daily but do like to get around. Most of my family and friends are in Cheshire and the North West and some in Lancashire so I’ve been concentrating my search around those regions. My DD is at uni in London so most important is a direct rail link or possibly a 1 change would be doable for weekend visits etc. I like the countryside but don’t fancy having to get in the car for a pint of milk or a drink in the pub. A active community to make new friends would be brilliant. I would love to know your thoughts and recommendations on locations you may live or have lived that would fit my criteria. Thanks in advance

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lastqueenofscotland · 18/11/2020 18:00

What’s your budget, some bits of the north west are incredibly expensive, so that could have a major baring

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Roxysoxmum · 18/11/2020 18:35

£350,000 max for a 3 bed, 2 bath

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Xiaoxiong · 23/11/2020 10:50

I guess the more important question is, where is your mum? Is your intention to live next door/down the road and pop in daily to see her? Or are you looking to move her in with you? Or are you going to need to move her into sheltered housing?

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rsababe · 23/11/2020 10:56

Do you prefer city/town/rural?

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rbe78 · 23/11/2020 11:01

North Staffs borders Cheshire and is a LOT cheaper in general...

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Justpassingtime1 · 23/11/2020 11:57

Dementia is a difficult illness to manage at home/alone.
Perhaps look into this provision when you move.
It can be pricey. Who will pay ?

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emmathedilemma · 23/11/2020 13:24

The main calling points for the Manchester - London trains are Stockport, Wilmslow and Crewe. Wilmslow might be a good fit for your countryside and local amenities although it's quite expensive.
Or somewhere like Marple which is a short drive to Stockport for the train. Marple has a station with connections into Manchester but it's not on the same line as Stockport.

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Roxysoxmum · 23/11/2020 16:09

Thank you for all your input it is very much appreciated. I will be having mum move in with me, I do know what I’m letting myself in for and plan to manage as long as I can which is why I was initially looking at the areas I mentioned in my first post because I have family that could help and give me weekends etc respite but I really need to be able to get to see my daughter whilst she’s in uni and for her to get home whenever she likes. She is used to living in Spain so was very happy jumping on a plane and coming over whenever she felt like but with COVID it has been such a long time and seems so much further away now than it ever used to do 😢. Not looking forward the the weather shock but looking forward to everything else. Thanks again

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Coldemort · 23/11/2020 16:14

Chester also has a direct link to London. Its 2 hours.

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Roxysoxmum · 03/12/2020 11:41

Thank you all for you suggestions. It is really helpful in my decision making or lack of lol. My DD thinks Newcastle/Durham area as it seems to have everything in as much as countryside, shopping and good links to London. I’ve been looking at a property in Esh Winning. It looks lovely and seems rural but yet has everything. Anyone know that area? 🙏

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emmathedilemma · 03/12/2020 11:59

Esh Winning (and most of the villages around) is an old mining village. They don't tend to be the prettiest of places, usually a mix of old terraced cottages with new builds on the periphery. Some of them are quite run down and deprived. You'll get a lot more for your money than around the North West though. I'd check bus connections into Durham if that would be your main shopping and transport hub.

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Roxysoxmum · 03/12/2020 13:04

Oh thanks for that. I do drive so not worried about buses but will still check that out as you never know when you might need one.

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bravotango · 03/12/2020 15:55

With that budget I'd look in Liverpool/the Wirral - you'd get a lovely house and would be able to make any necessary changes to the property for when your mum moves in. Liverpool is 2hr20ish from London by train, and you can drive to the beach/Delamere Forest etc for nice scenery (also easy access to the motorway so good for keeping up contact with family and friends). I'm biased because I live here but I think you get a lot of bang for your buck, so to speak.

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emmathedilemma · 03/12/2020 15:59

you might drive but driving into uk cities, particularly old ones like Durham, for shopping etc is rarely much fun!

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Roxysoxmum · 03/12/2020 16:22

@bravotango

With that budget I'd look in Liverpool/the Wirral - you'd get a lovely house and would be able to make any necessary changes to the property for when your mum moves in. Liverpool is 2hr20ish from London by train, and you can drive to the beach/Delamere Forest etc for nice scenery (also easy access to the motorway so good for keeping up contact with family and friends). I'm biased because I live here but I think you get a lot of bang for your buck, so to speak.

My family in Wallasey would agree with that and are also looking for suitable properties for me. Thanks
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PigletJohn · 03/12/2020 16:34

I think your mother will do better living in a familiar environment where she may still have friends and other contacts

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Roxysoxmum · 03/12/2020 17:22

@PigletJohn

I think your mother will do better living in a familiar environment where she may still have friends and other contacts

My mother has lived in Spain for over 18 years and doesn’t remember the U.K. or family members there really. All of her friends in Spain have passed away or moved back to the U.K. to be with family. As long as she’s with me she’ll be fine anywhere. It’s me that’s having a problem finding somewhere I could live but knowing I’m near facilities because I’ll need them no doubt for mum. I have lived in many areas of the U.K. and other countries and quite open to a completely new area. I just want to make sure it’s a safe area or as safe as anywhere can be and most importantly easy train link to and from London for my DD to come home at weekends and holidays.
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alexdgr8 · 03/12/2020 17:34

the north west is much nearer to London, i was going to suggest Lancaster, nearby countryide and wonderful coastal views wildlife over Morecombe Bay. and Lake District nearby.
i think it may be a direct train from London, or one change at Preston. don't go there, grim.
or North Wales, Chester, Lancashire, Liverpool and environs.
better connections to london than the north-east. which is also considerably colder, on the North Sea, and not having the benefit of the gulf stream. your mother will notice the difference from sunny Spain.
good luck.

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Funf · 03/12/2020 19:53

Liverpool, and surrounding areas have some excellent places, but I would look at Shropshire / welsh borders

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CatAndHisKit · 04/12/2020 02:54

Durham is a very long train trip from London! Not feasible for weekends if frequent, too tiring).

What about Worcester? Know people who live there and it's nice, laid-back and friemndly, more indie places in the centre now, river walks, with countyraide on doorstep.
Chester maybe though I don't know it really.

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Fruitpips99 · 04/12/2020 03:31

I think what you are doing for your mother is wonderful but are you sure moving back to the UK is a good idea (unless Brexit means you aren't able to stay)? Speaking as someone who has had quite a lot of experience of elderly close relatives living abroad/and in UK, I'm not sure I would choose my location based on the support family members back home will be able to offer, unless you are absolutely 100% sure of them doing so. (In my experience siblings don't always share the care of frail parents evenly.)

To my mind the medical support and support for the elderly in your area (care homes etc/dementia care) would be much more important criteria. I don't wish to sound gloomy, but don't underestimate what a huge part gps, carers, hospitals etc will play in your life from now on. Being near good dementia resources could make a huge difference to your life. The UK system is under-resourced and tough to navigate. It may be different in Spain but my elderly relatives (one with dementia) benefited from really excellent health care provision in France and from the sunnier climes.

Also (saying this very gently) but, in my experience, the elderly don't tend to thrive on major house/country moves so late on in life. My father moved when he was eighty-one and in hindsight the upheaval set off a whole string of ill-health conditions that shortened his life.

If you do move back to the UK though, fwiw, we have family members who find the primary and hospital care for the elderly a bit patchy in the Lakes/Preston/Morecambe area but much better generally in Liverpool/Wirral. (That's obviously a huge generalisation.)

Good luck with the decision op Flowers

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