Having a wobble about house we have chosen - tell me we made the right decision

[Coriandersucks]

We are moving to be closer to my family, about 200 miles away. Have a cash buyer for our house and had an offer accepted on a property and things moving along.

But I’m having a massive wobble. Whilst I’ve been desperate to move back home for the last 10 years, we are making huge compromises.

Our current house is old, full of character, we spent £30k renovating it and making it perfect. It has lovely views across the countryside.

Our new house is a new build so with two small children we thought this would be easy as little maintenance and no more renovating. And parking which will be a dream come true as we have a bit of a slog to get to our house from our car at the moment.

But we are losing two rooms (utility and a play room) so storage will be minimal I’m having to massively downsize. We are going from 11 cupboards and 7 drawers in the kitchen to 4 cupboards and 3 drawers. Plus losing all the storage we had in the utility.

I’m looking at extra shelving and an island that we can add in the kitchen and potentially one of those office things in the garden, so there will be ways around it but I just can’t help feeling we are taking a huge step back.

We also had to compromise on area. We have had to choose a large town over a small village which is what we are in now. It’s good as it has a swimming pool in walking distance and lots of shops but its certainly not pretty or rural.

I keep looking on rightmove to see if there are any other houses but there’s literally nothing - the market has ground to a halt in that county now so I think it’s a case of beggars can’t be choosers and I’m nervous of waiting til next year because who knows what position we will all be in by then.

I’m guessing it’s normal to feel like this when you love the house you live in but could do with some reassurance!

Me too. Love our existing home, new house is on a main-ish road.

Lots of parking at the front, it's set back from the road - so my head tells me not to worry. Lovely garden and house inside is almost exactly what we need.

But I am really scared we are making a very expensive mistake!!

First of all Coriander is divine.
It will be fine maybe not dream home but great for your family. Will you be able to walk to town amenities now?
Country charm can come in the next stage of life

Is renting an option?

Would you be looking to move again or is this a long term move?
If your head tells you can manage then maybe it's ok - and you will get used to it.

It's nice being in the centre of everything and walking everywhere too.

Sounds like you're wobbling on this specific house, rather than the move per se. If I were you I would consider moving and renting for a bit. Buying the wrong house is an expensive mistake, but at the same time there will always be compromises. Might something better come up if you rented for a year?

We need links!

The house sounds like quite a big compromise. Is renting a possibility at all?

Are you moving to a more expensive area?

If we could rent I would but I’m not kidding when I say there is nothing in our price range that gives us what we need in the area we need it!

This move is to see us through the primary school years. We saw a couple of other much older character properties which were lovely but either needed far too much work doing or had weird features like the garden being a 2 minute walk away - places which just wouldn’t work with two toddlers.

I’m definitely not against the move itself, I can’t wait to get back to that area but it’s like I’m looking at where I live now in a whole new light.

It’s a more expensive area as in the county is one big tourist destination so we knew we would have to compromise somewhere.

Salaries aren’t great there either so whilst I’m fortunate I can do my current job from home for now it’s not a permanent solution so I’m conscious this is probably the most money I will ever be earning so we won’t be able to afford the perfect property even in a few years when we are ready to move again.

I think I just need to focus on how much easier our lives will be knowing we can just enjoy our children growing up without thinking about walls coming down or installing a new bathroom.

Also not having to drive everywhere for things will be quite nice - to say ‘I’m walking into town’, and we can finally get takeaways delivered.

Ok this is helping!

We are in almost exactly the same position, moving "home" and being unsure about the house, especially as some of the searches have made us feel like we have massively overpaid.

Do you think it's the best house you can get for your money? And have you got it for a reasonably ok price? We are on the verge of pulling out of ours (because we were misled by our sellers and the answers to these questions is therefore no). There will always be areas you have to compromise, but you have to decide whether they are reasonable or if you have real doubts. We love our current house too and will be slightly downsizing either way, but if it didn't have the issues that have recently arisen we would be accepting of it. Good luck, it's a lot to get your head around.

It sounds as though you are moving to The New Forest.
That is quite a compromise a playroom and utility down plus kitchen space.

If you are absolutely set on moving to that area and recognise that it is expensive then those may just have to be the compromises to make. But moving house is expensive and you do need to be certain that you are making the right choice.

The added problem is that the market is now slowing with not much coming on. Presumably there will be more early next year/Spring. If you are really not into this house then pull out and rent. But rent outside of that area in a slightly cheaper area and accept limited space for a short space of time in rental with a view to finding perhaps a more suitable house.

I'm having a wobble too OP! Suddenly feel very emotional and teary at the thought of leaving my current house. Sorry you are going through this but also a bit relieved I'm not the only one

I wouldn’t given what you’ve said. I don’t think the new house will work as you’ll constantly feel you’ve downgraded.

for everyone else feeling the same - although it is reassuring it seems to be a common thing. I’ve never been particularly emotional about moving house but then I’ve never really loved a house like this one before.

Weird thing is when we were viewing the new property I felt so excited I couldn’t wait to get in - for days afterwards I was obsessively working out where all our stuff would go so now I feel like we are already moved in. I really can see us living there and being happy but I’m a true believer of listening to your gut but I don’t know what the solution might be.

For personal reasons I need to be near my family sooner rather than later so feel like I’m not being left with much choice.

I have what you have now plenty rooms and plenty storage. Truthfully my kitchen drawers and cupboards are full of stuff I never or rarely use. Including the utility I have 16 cupboards, 1 tall cupboard, 8 drawers and 2 pan drawers plus all of the appliances.

My wardrobes are similarly full of stuff, downsizing gives you a great opportunity to declutter.

I wish I’d posted under new username then I would have put links 🙄

Change your name

it doesnt sound a great move honestly.... especially if you are compromising your earnings and earning potential as well -
so lot smaller house
less wages
new build over character
no hope of changing in the future....

what are the schools like? how old are DC ? how bigs the garden - could you extend?
coudl you move back to where you are currently...

why right now this minte - I would wait ... you say there are family reasons to move quickly but are they family reasons that are likely to be different in 6months/1 yr time?
are those reasons going to change
what are the mid term 4-5 years impacts on you likely to be for either decision..
apart from takeaway and walking to swimming pool you have mentioned no positives about the move.....it sounds like you are giving up a lot to gain a little?

I know this sounds v negative but I know a number of people that moved quickly and for only 1 has it been ok .. all the others have regretted and either come back/moved somewhere else / changed house and spent a lot of money in doing so......

is it a knee jerk reaction to a situation.. .whilst you say you've wanted to move for a while... is it to that sort of house- ?

I’d do it! You don’t need loads of space or storage - you can just have a good declutter! Bet you’ll fine you have heaps of stuff you don’t need just a stored away!

For me it would always be a smaller house closer to amenities though - especially as the kids get bigger - stay where you are now and you’ll spend your time driving them everywhere as they get bigger And want to go places / see friends / go to the cinema etc

Plus you can always move again in a few years surely?

Your teenagers will thank you for it. Things to do on the doorsteps, friends around the corner, a great social life, clubs and hobbies, bars and restaurants.

All that and family nearby.

Happy kids, happy home. You dont have to stay in the new build forever.

It’s hard to tell op, four kitchen cupboards is beyond tiny but then you say it has room for an island, which only can be placed in big kitchens, so it seems the kitchen is not actually furnished fully which is unusual for a a new build.

Check the rooms are big enough for wardrobes etc. However ultimately if you want to make the move and this is all you can afford then it’s a compromise you need to make.

It’s definitely not a knee jerk move - it’s been on the cards for years but now is the time for numerous reasons I won’t bore you with here.

Once we’ve moved that’s it we won’t be leaving that county again - for me it’s going home so no reason to go elsewhere, for dp there’s not enough keeping him where we are now.

Money wise we will be better off for the time being as dp will be keeping his job (commuting during the week) as will I but wfh. Hopefully that will continue for a while to allow me to find something more local or perhaps it will be permanent - not really sure but for the time being we will be ok.

We got the house for a good price - very close to what we sold for so we get to keep our equity - looking at around 75%ltv.

The kitchen is huge but odd because fuck all cupboards - it’s ridiculous but at least there is scope for us to add furniture. Maybe I could find out from the developers what units they used.

There are built in wardrobes in two of the bedrooms which is actually better than we have now as our bedrooms are tiny - I don’t even own a wardrobe!

The garden is really big so yes I guess there could be potential for an extension at some point.

There are lots of pluses and it feels like the grown up, sensible thing to do, just not quite what I had envisioned.

Maybe once I’ve decluttered things might feel better. I’ve already started selling things and a skip is on order!

If your current house was in the new area would you be able to afford it? If not then you just have to face the fact that you are buying the best you can afford in the area you love. It sounds as though you are buying a house you could extend in the future and build on a utility and playroom as it has a big garden. You can easily add units to the kitchen if it’s huge, it just sounds badly laid out, think what the house could be not what it is now if it’s a long term home.

Probably not what you want to hear (sorry) but going on what you’ve said, I wouldn’t make this move. Your current place sounds lovely!

Still not sure I understand. I’ve never heard of a developer only putting four cupboards in a massive kitchen, but it seems you’re upgrading overall, so it’s just a case of putting more cupboards in the kitchen, you’ve a massive garden and your bedrooms even have built in storage.

So it’s all good right?