London vs Cornwall - where's best to raise a family?

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DH and I currently live in London with our DD, who is six months old. DH has been given the opportunity to move down to Cornwall for his work, to the Penzance/Newlyn area - and we're now in a complete muddle over what to do!

We've lived in London for quite a while and have lots of friends here plus some family about two hours away. I love the huge amount of culture on offer, the countless great restaurants, museums and fabulous parks and public spaces.

On the other hand, I can't stand the pollution and worry about schools (actually the primaries near us are fine, but the secondaries are not so good). I also find living in London quite stressful and "full on" sometimes - I think it's just being in such close proximity to so many people.

Cornwall is absolutely beautiful and I love the thought of having a slower, quieter pace of life, with lots of walks in the countryside and on the beach. The thought of having a much lower mortgage (by over £1000 per month!) also appeals to me. I grew up in a rural area and totally adored it, but I'm aware that not all children do.

My main worry about moving to Cornwall is that I'm really afraid we won't make any friends and will be totally isolated (I've read other threads on MN where people say the Cornish aren't very welcoming to outsiders - no idea how true that is). I also worry about lack of job opportunities for DD when she's older, and am scared we will get down there, hugely regret it and be miserable.

Does anyone have any advice?

My dp and I commute pt Cornwall to London.
I spend more time in Cornwall now..
We moved though when are dds were all older, two left home two in sixth form
We are a blended family..
I would have jumped to live here when my dds where tiny
Its fabulous place to live and there is loads going on, growing up by the beach, learning to surf, loads of culturally interesting stuff. Though a lot of it is perhaps a bit alternative /mildly hippyish
We commute by plane from Newquay or do the sleeper train... Both quite easy.

I think there's advantages and disadvantages to raising kids in both places. Go with where you and DH would be happiest - teenagers will always find something to moan about anywhere!

[quote Tollergirl]@ramblingsonthego - please don't post such sweeping generalisations. Both my DC were born at Treliske and I had great care. I also have friends who have been treated for cancer at Treliske - you are misinformed if you think everyone has to go to Plymouth.

My DP has worked in the "poor" NHS in Cornwall for 20 years - I'll be sure to tell him it's all been in vain ... alongside all his colleagues who are obviously not up to much ...[/quote]
It requires improvement according to the CQC. Locals (I have no direct experience only what my husbands family tell me) complain about it a lot apparently.

I live in Cornwall. My daughter moved away from here to give her daughter (aged 7) a better chance in life. The people were lovely, but the lack of diversity or ambition or challenge was a worry. She only went as far as a city in Devon, but finds it completely different.

@SheepandCow

OP is hardly going to worry about somewhere being 'packed with tourists' if she currently lives in London - which is full of tourists year round!

Where are you from OP? If you're looking to bring your dc up rurally would you consider where you grew up? Do you still have a support network there? Any job opportunities for you or your dh?

Cornwall is beautiful and has a lot to offer families, not least a healthier lifestyle, but unfortunately a small but vocal minority of locals can be rather insular towards outsiders. If you can mentally prepare for that (and bear in mind most people are fine) I agree with a pp. Rent out your current home and try renting in Cornwall for a year to see how it goes.

Yes London has a lot of tourists but at least the transport is pretty good. In Cornwall if you have to drive the roads are awful in summer.

I think the suggestion of renting your London place out is a good one. I so wish we had rented our London house out and not sold it

@ramblingsonthego - plenty of hospitals across England "require improvement" too (wonder why?). I guess you live somewhere where no one ever complains about their local hospital...

Good to know it's going to be Hell down here after Brexit. That's cheered me up no end.

My DP had cancer care at Plymouth (choices were there, Southampton, Bristol or London) and it was very good indeed. Admittedly the 1hr15min drive each way every day for weeks was killing for me, but at least there wasn't much traffic - and it would have taken even longer to get to Kings in London from our previous home in Kent.

And regarding the traffic - where we live is not t bad at all. When we moved here we couldn't believe how comparatively empty the roads were...a traffic jam seemed to be three cars long!

@FuzzyPuffling - I agree re traffic. I mean if you're planning on the A30 on Saturday in the summer, forget it, but if you know the back routes you can usually avoid the worst bits. When we visit family near Oxford the traffic is a hundred times worse than it is down here. Tractors aside ... (we were behind a convoy of 4 of the buggers on Saturday)

Ha ha Tollergirl...always factor in tractors!

Whatever you do, don't sell your London property until you're sure you want to settle in Cornwall.

I think at £300k your budget might limit you. Most 2 beds are around this price. 3 beds are a bit more.

I think Penzance is a bit run down. It’s not very dynamic. Friends live fairly close and they are not huge fans. It’s remote and the only saving grace is the countryside and beaches. So, if you really want that life, go for it. It’s definitely not very culturally diverse in Cornwall.

I think once you go to toddler groups and nursery, you would find friends.

If you love London, you would be bored! I’m in Cornwall a lot and it’s full of retired people with money, well off Doctors and other professionals but plenty with a low wage who depend on holidaymakers. Great for holidays but not necessarily somewhere to live.

I grew up in Scotland but my dads from Plymouth. I've visited Cornwall almost every year. Its great and the ppl are lovely.
I'd definitely stay in Cornwall over London.

I would also add that it's worth thinking about family. How close are you to your family? How much do you want them yo be a part of your children's lives? I live 2.5 hours away from my family and even that feels too long sometimes, especially when it comes to having help with the kids. Basically, we are on our own up here. No kids having sleepovers (that might change as they get older), very few date nights or nights where anyone can do the school drop off or pick up. With one, that was OK but with two, especially now they are older, I wish I had family closer. Not just for support for me but also so the kids could see their cousins and aunties and grandma more. I do have some lovely friends up here but they all have their own kids of similar ages so tricky to be able to call on them if I need anything. If you're not that close to your family, then obviously this might not be an issue at all. And I suppose it depends a little on where they are. 2 hours from London could be Bristol to be fair and that wouldn't be quite so bad. Although it had taken us 4 hours before to get from Bristol to South Cornwall. Its a huge decision. And I definitely agree that renting first makes sense. And, if you're going to try, now is the time so, of it doesn't work out, you can get settled again before primary school applications.

I would prefer Cornwall as long as if you want to work there would be something for you in future. I wouldn't worry about job opportunities for DD if she's 6 months old - you can always move again in 18 years or so or she can move away after university / for first job.

I would do lots of research - look into areas, schools, activities for all ages of children. We moved rurally away from London and there's more to do here closeby than there was in London but that's as we researched areas very carefully and chose to live by the school and activities like air cadets, army cadets, singing/music lessons as well as school gym and club are all based at school. So everything for the kids is 5 mins walk. House was half the price meaning we got a much bigger garden and can keep chickens which DS loves.

Only thing with Cornwall is it is hard to reach other places from there. We also found when we visited Devon not in peak season a lot was closed so check what is open when. It maybe worth renting and renting to trial out though I think its a good time to sell now so might go with selling and renting in Cornwall. Often even with all the research in the world its still hard to know a place until you are there or know local people. We bought but knew the area already.

We lived in London for 10 years before moving to Cornwall 17 years ago. We all love to visit London but we love coming home again! The children spend more time outdoors than they would do in London. We can go to the beach, surfing after school in the summer. The weather tends to be cooler than London in the Summer but warmer in the winter. There are lots of things to do in Summer and winter. We didn't have any family or friends here when we moved but have found people friendly and helpful. I love West Cornwall. Penzance, Marazion and Zennor are all great places. Life is busier in the summer but its not the end of the world! Happy for you to message me if that would be helpful.

I'm Cornish but very happily expatriated in London. I'm from mid Cornwall rather than 'down west' but some things to think about:

• the employment situation is diabolical- you dont say what your DP does but if he movomg for a job or a career path in the area? A lot of jobs are dead man's shoes and most of my family who are professionals have spent periods living in london/bristol/brum during the week and commuting back. Do you work? A lot of jobs are seasonal and poorly paid. Poverty is very high as a result.
• don't assume the schools are better. London has some of the best schools in the country. One of the things that drive me away was the crushing lack of ambition within school- I hope that's changed and I have friends who have set up businesses etc but horizons can still be limited. It's a long way from anywhere.
• house prices are high. You may see cheaper places but check the location of these very carefully. Penzance I think is OK- they have a great sea pool which is heated and the high st is not bad for cornwall, but not much idea on culture etc in that area.
• you will always be an 'incomer'- people may be pleasant to your face, but you'll always be an outsider. That might be ok by you and will be easier in one of the small towns than a village. Casual racism is common and not challenged.
• the cost of living is high. You need to run at least 1 car, usually 2, there's no competition for cafes and restaurants and free cultural activities are very rare. I always come home bankrupt. Yes you can do the beach and lovely walks but in Feb when it's rained for 3 months straight? It does also rain a lot in summer.

Having said all this most of my family live there so it can't be that bad! On a sunny day in May it's lovely. I had quite an idyllic childhood at primary age but found it harder and harder as I got older, and that was being an outdoorsy kid as well.

You need to be on for constantly ferrying kids around and I think making sure they are exposed to life the other side of the Tamar is a good idea. Living near a mainline station is also a good idea then as they get older they can head into Truro or up to Plymouth independently.

NHS care is poor- not because of the skill of any of the staff but because the service is spread so thinly over a large area. Same for SEND provision. 15 acute beds for the county. You may be lucky and this not be an issue.

Moving over the winter would be tough going too, but at least you'd have the summer to look forward to.

Never lived in either place, but have had holidays in Cornwall and London.

Cornwall is lovely, but it’s so far south. I would feel cut of living there.

I would heavily advocate for London for schooling and healthcare. I also think the opportunities post education for DC are extremely good in London. Cornwall is beautiful but slower paced.

I moved back to Cornwall from the edges of Brussels last year and am glad to be back. I am at the opposite end of the county to where the OP is thinking of moving, but the traffic isn't as bad as made out, and if you pick your travel times it is OK. I regularly did Dover to the Devon/ Cornwall border in about 6 hours with stops. I could get to Egham from Mums (on the border) in about 4 hours with a swift pit stop at Fleet services.

It depends how much you like cities and the free stuff. We have great restaurants down here, loads of outdoor space (and the beaches), without the London prices. I loathe cities, hence I am happy to be back, and not stuck in Brussels traffic.

You have some great expensive restaurants in Cornwall and some average ones. Compared with London, there’s not much choice! I say that a restaurant devotee!

Depends how much choice you want! Lots of great restaurants in Brussels but we always ended up at the small local ones.

I did say it depends how much you like cities...I don't, so am happy with what is about locally.

How do you live in zone 2/3 with a £300,000 budget?

In any case as pp suggested I would hold on to your London property and rent in Cornwall until you are sure you want to live there long term.

Your DC is young enough to chop and change

Cornwall is nice and all, it's just a bit too far the other way IMO. I wouldn't do it, but I'd definitely still look at moving out of London. There's a reason it's so common to do once you start a family!