Are we mad? Large house for 3 people

[Cluckycluck]

At the moment we live in a large 3 bedroom house. There is only myself, my husband and our 3 year old and we don't want to have anymore children.

Although I love our current house, it's layout is no longer working for us. It's a bungalow with 3 acres. Previously owners just randomly added extensions around the house so its not conventional at all. The longer we live here the less it is working for us.

We are in a really good position financially and can comfortably afford a very, very nice house. We want something old with features and the majority of places that fill our list of wants in the right areas have 6 bedrooms with 5+ acres.

We have found two places I love one with 9 bedrooms and one with 6 bedrooms.

Honestly are we absolutely mad to be considering such large houses for the three of us?

We're a family of 3 with a 5 bedroom house, and as a child I was in a family of 3 with a 6/7 bedroom house. Both are lovely and have always felt a good size for the number of people.

Before DC we lived in a large 5 bedroom house. It was awful, just the two of us knocking around a big hollow house. We have 2 DC now and live in a much smaller property and actually, it's easier.

I'd think about what you would use the rooms for. What space is downstairs?

Office space/study?
Playroom?
Dressing room?

Do you have guests over regularly enough to warrant guest rooms?

Can you manage the land?

If you'll use the space, it's fine but it seems crazy to have a large house you won't use just for a few features

Would building your own work better then you can make the spaces fit you

I don’t think you’re mad at all. I would be mainly thinking about if you are happy to clean such a large home or get help to do so.

You could have his and hers bedrooms so you could sleep in one room together but keep all your own things in your own rooms. I would love this!!

Kids bedroom plus his/her own playroom and later study room.

2 guest bedrooms so you could accommodate 1 family with 2 kids to stay.

That’s already all your bedrooms used in the 6B house!!

I would have said that there is no such thing as too much space but actually I think 9 bedrooms is probably too much. You would end up with several rooms just closed up and not in use.
Five acres is also a lot of land. You would need staff to maintain house and land but if you can afford that then why not.

We think we prefer the property which has:
6 bedrooms
3 bathrooms
1 bed self contained annexe
2 reception rooms
Dining room
Kitchen breakfast room
Study
Cellar
Boot room
Utility room

@CbatothinkofausernameCbatothinkofausername
I love the idea of his and hers bedrooms!

YANBU for wanting to live in a big house, especially if you can afford it, and if it’s an older house in need of TLC (as all older houses do) then someone needs to take care of it, so why not you? I don’t think you should go above the 6 bedrooms though. We have me, DH and 2 DC (ages 5 and 3) in a house that has 5 beds, and 4 receps - it’s fine but it is actually a bit big. The one thing I will say is that furnishing it is a nightmare, and all that happens is stuff gets lost, moved around. There are so many places to look for things, and things like Lego just migrate

I just found a bigger house more to clean/maintain.

I pictured that I would socialise more regularly and have people to stay but actually a few rooms just turned into junk rooms and I am still antisocial 😂

The house I am in has an extra bedroom, and 2 extra social rooms beyond the usual living room and kitchen. I honestly wouldn’t want to go bigger than this again unless I had more children.

I was looking for a period property with a good garden and a view. The kind of old house I wanted rarely came up. I viewed a 250 year old weavers cottage, completely fell in love with it. It is large, on 3 levels with 4 double bedrooms. There is only me, my Husband and two dogs.

It just came up, and I loved it. At the same time I was also viewing 2 bed cottages.

I was looking more for character than bedrooms. You don't necessarily have to fill every room?

Ours is a little bigger than that and we have a housekeeper, cleaner and gardener for the day to day upkeep. It’s just something to be mindful of.

It's lovely to have space but that seems too big. Cleaning and maintenance might be a drag after a bit, managing staff isn't always easy and will cost ££. Think of all the experiences you could give your child with the extra money if you had a smaller property - amazing travelling, education, pension, buy them a flat/house etc. Children remember security and love and experiences. If you have money for all of that and extra then go ahead.

I live alone in a house with four bedrooms, two bathrooms, further toilet, kitchen, dining room, living room, and large conservatory. Double gage and utility room attached. Lovely large gardens laying down to a river. I can afford it, it affords me my own home office and craft room with spare bedroom to boot. Why shouldn't you have a large house if that suits you?

My best friend has a five bedroom for two of them and has his and her ensuite bathrooms. Again, they can afford it, so why not.

We currently live in a 5 bed house just me, DH and toddler. To be honest we use about 5 rooms. Several rooms I never go in, and do seem a waste. If you are happy with the amount of cleaning and maintenance it takes then why not. But I do feel guilty about not using rooms, so much so I am considering knocking some walls down so I use them more

We are three people in a 6 bedroom plus annexe. We both work from home so use bedrooms as offices plus we often (in normal times) have people to stay which uses another 2 bedrooms.

Absolutely love all the extra space but it does cost a lot to run compared to our previous house.

I’d be the opposite. Although I wouldn’t want to be crowded, I prefer a smaller inside space, with a minimalistic vibe. I’d love a very large garden though!

If you are happy with your present location and if there’s enough land for you what about knocking down the bungalow and building your dream house? You can build exactly what you want and you avoid stamp duty and will benefit from zero VAT on your building costs. Unless you are in an area where houses are cheap that is.

House insurance can be quite difficult to obtain once you hit 6 beds so something to bare in mind.

Sorry just read you want something old. Ignore me.

6 bedrooms I could easily utilise, 9 bedrooms is another level!

Same size family with same size home and we are looking at a similar upgrade!
We have family and friends visiting from abroad and staying for about a week at the time, few times a year. And somehow we end up having visitors staying overnight relatively often (friends/family in between houses, colleagues with failed hotel bookings, friends sleeping here before we all leave for holiday together, friend's children staying for a sleepover, etc).
That means that we need at least 3-4 bedrooms. But we are also considering hiring an au-pair, which increases the number of bedrooms to 5 ish.
Also, we need two home offices as we both work from home (even when not in lockdown) and if the house has no study or only 1 means a bedroom would need to be converted into a study. That brings the bedroom to 6 potentially!
On the ground floor we would like a big kitchen/dining and a pantry. And two separate living rooms: one just sofas and bookcases and one as a TV room. As we have a toddler we would ideally like a playroom....

Think carefully about what you would use the space for. That’s a lot of house.

I downsized a couple of years ago from a very large 7000 square foot house. Big period property with large formal and informal gardens.

Several reasons:

General upkeep was time consuming and expensive.
There were parts of the house that I didn’t go Into for weeks at a time.
Getting it furnished was epic - at one point I owned 13 sofas.
It cost a fortune to heat - more than the rent on a small flat in London

I’m now in a large 5 bed, much more manageable property.

Budget for a housekeeper, and fill your boots!

I think as long as you can handle (or afford other people to handle) the cleaning, maintenance and garden, why not? I’m living in a small new build two bed flat in London with my husband and a housemate, but looking to buy a 4-5 bedroom property in the commuter belt. I do love not having to waste any of my spare time on maintenance or cleaning, but on the other hand I long for a garden and a beautiful period property. We have close family who have a 9 bedroom house with about 15 acres for just the two of them, plus about 4-5 big barns and outbuildings, and they manage all the gardening themselves and only have a couple of cleaners in once every couple of months to do a full days deep clean. And they’re in their late sixties. On the other hand my parents are stingy so seem to spend almost their entire lives doing chores and maintenance around their 5 bedroom house (plus two bed annexe and acre garden) and it doesn’t seem a good use of their time to me.

So it is possible and enjoyable but go in with your eyes open about the time and money drain of maintenance. Be realistic about if you want to do it yourselves, in which case it will become your main “hobby”. If you don’t want it to be your main hobby, set aside money for cleaners, gardeners and handymen from the beginning.

There's 3 of us, and we have a 5 bed house. In actuality, ds has a bedroom and a bedroom used as a study, we have a bedroom and a bedroom used for craft etc (and we are putting a desk in there too), then one bedroom is always set up as a guest room (the others have futons so can be used if we have a house full).
In the house you are considering, the annexe would be great as you could use it for a live in housekeeper or nanny. I don't think it would be too big at all, and lovely to have space to have perhaps a dressing room

Can you afford a cleaner and gardener for hours every week? Heating the whole place? Furnishing, decorating, all of the random little costs that will crop up? We’ve seen some really big houses we like, but it’s the long term maintenance costs you have to think about.