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Living in a building site

13 replies

Alison9 · 01/08/2019 10:33

Myself and my husband including 3 children, husbands mum and brother have been living in a building site for 18 months now. We're having a double storey extension. When the builder fitted spot lights in the kitchen it looked really nice , so we decided to have the whole house with spot lights. This cost well over budget. Then as the builder was tiling the new supposedly bathroom. Husband changed his mind and decided to have the bathroom changed to another room instead. This slightly annoyed the builder. Our good friends from across the road put our kids up for around 8 weeks. Including most of our clothes that are in suitcases at their house are still there. But my son doesn't really want to live in our shell of a house, as it's still pretty much a building site. So he's like a magnet to our friends house, which has been refurbed to a high standard by themselves. But I feel they are getting a little annoyed now and need their own space. To make matters worse we've run out of funding and the builder as since taken on another job and insists on us providing all the building materials and not in dribs and drabs. So he only makes an appearance twice a week, if that. No money left for kitchen, woodwork Including doors, carpets etc. And now we've realised the new extension brickwork is wonky. After taking my washing to their house weekly for the last year or so, they have made an excuse that their washing machine is not working. But they seem to have washing up in their garden washing line. They also wake my son up around 8am to go home and say they need to go somewhere. But their car remains on their driveway.

OP posts:
BlueSkiesLies · 01/08/2019 11:31

After taking my washing to their house weekly for the last year or so, they have made an excuse that their washing machine is not working. But they seem to have washing up in their garden washing line. They also wake my son up around 8am to go home and say they need to go somewhere. But their car remains on their driveway.

LOL good joke post mate, tres amusing.

Probably would have been better posting in AIBU if you wanted to start a bun fight tho.

Alison9 · 01/08/2019 14:18

What a nasty reply. I hope you have to live on a building site to see the stress it causes you. I have done my friends many favours in the past. And need help in my time of need and seem they have let us down badly. We have simply run out of money. Simple as. If a wanted to start a joke post. I have better things to do in my time.

OP posts:
PooWillyBumBum · 02/08/2019 10:56

In the gentlest possible way, I'm not surprised your neighbour is annoyed. Letting someone in once a week to do laundry and keeping your kids for 8 weeks is a MASSIVE favour, one most people wouldn't even ask family. Also you're in this position in part because you've overstretched yourselves with the spotlights and changing your mind about the room, surely you must see how they might be fed up?

I'd probably tell my kids to suck it up and come back to live at home, start using a laundrette and try and get a loan to get the works finished. Sorry - it does sound like you're in an awful position.

ScarlettOHarasWaist · 02/08/2019 11:08

I'd say your very good friends are fed up with being used and taken advantage of by you and your family.
I find it very hard to believe that you've only just noticed that the brickwork in your 18 month old extension is wonky.
It's always more expensive to change your mind part of the way through a building project.
All you can do is try to raise money to get it finished, maybe try and re-mortgage based on the projected value when the work is finished.

JoJoSM2 · 02/08/2019 11:08

Agree with PooWillyBumBum

Your neighbours have been incredibly generous but I can see that they have had enough.

You took on a project, made changes as you went along, didn’t budget properly etc made a complete mess of your lives. I agree that the best way it to take out a loan and finish the house on the cheap. Do all the DIY you can too and just get on with your lives.

Iwanttoredecorateagain · 02/08/2019 11:12

I would get out from under their feet. That would be too much imo.

Surely some spot lights haven't caused the budget issues.

LazyFace · 02/08/2019 11:13

We've been living on a building site since sept 2017. Two kids, a dog and a cat. I didn't ask for favours, everyone had to put up with it.
I think it was extremely nice of your neighbours to offer to help but you can't expect them to do it any more.
I'm really sorry that your builder has done a runner too (so has our original one) but it's not your neighbours' problem.

sugarbum · 02/08/2019 11:18

Then as the builder was tiling the new supposedly bathroom. Husband changed his mind and decided to have the bathroom changed to another room instead. This slightly annoyed the builder.

Possibly understating a little the builders feelings on the matter here Grin

Our good friends from across the road put our kids up for around 8 weeks. Including most of our clothes that are in suitcases at their house are still there.

god they're saints

To make matters worse we've run out of funding and the builder as since taken on another job and insists on us providing all the building materials and not in dribs and drabs. So he only makes an appearance twice a week, if that.

Probably sick of flaky customers

After taking my washing to their house weekly for the last year or so, they have made an excuse that their washing machine is not working. But they seem to have washing up in their garden washing line. They also wake my son up around 8am to go home and say they need to go somewhere. But their car remains on their driveway.

Good on them. They've finally had the balls to say they've had enough, although not enough balls to say it directly.

You're taking the p*ss OP. You really are. I'd say your friends have gone above and beyond. I'm not saying its fun living on a building site, but from what you have written, your lack of planning has created a massive problem, and it really is not their issue to deal with.

BlueSkiesLies · 02/08/2019 13:23

I'm really sorry that your builder has done a runner too (so has our original one) but it's not your neighbours' problem

The builder hasn’t done a runner... he has stopped being paid and is only coming onsite to do work when the OP buys materials...

DavetheCat2001 · 02/08/2019 13:53
Hmm
Alison9 · 05/08/2019 22:14

Ok. I understand that we've been relying on our friends across the road for alot recently. But I feel as though we've been you know. A bit too ambitious in the extension. Gosh their house looks so much better. I'm actually jealous. Their! It's out in the open.

OP posts:
BitOftheSea · 05/08/2019 23:43

Well yes, starting an extension you can’t afford to finish is a bit over ambitious.

buttertoasty · 05/08/2019 23:48

I think this will be the end of your friendship.

Could you get a loan and a caravan? If not I'd say cut your losses and sell up

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