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How long to settle in to new home?

12 replies

AlanisM · 22/01/2019 05:34

I lived in my previous home for 16 years. DH and I recently bought a newer, more expensive home in a nicer neighborhood. I am the one who wanted to move to get away from a busy street that seemed to be getting busier, and thought I would be much happier on a quieter street. DH did not want to move initially but came on board when he saw the new house. I have been in my new house 3 days now and I don’t like it. I miss all the old familiar grooves of my old house. I feel terrible because it was my idea and not DH’s to move, and DH is excited about the new house. He knows that I am not and I feel terrible. I am hoping it passes and I settle in and start to love the house. Has this happened to any of you?

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overmydeadbody · 22/01/2019 05:36

It took me about six months before I felt my new house was my home.

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Ladymargarethall · 22/01/2019 05:49

We had been in our old house 32 years. Been in this one 21months and it is only just feeling like home.
I experienced a point where I no longer wanted to go back to the old house (we pass the end of our old road every day and sometimes walk past it) but this one didn't yet feel like home.u
Like you we have moved to a bigger house, but after 32 years I knew every nook and cranny and creaky floorboard.
I hadn't realised how difficult it would be, but we had very sound reasons to.move.

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caesio · 22/01/2019 05:54

Very natural to hate it after 3 days. Your body is exhausted from all the unpacking. Your brain is exhausted as everything you did automatically in the last house e.g. go to loo at night/make cup of tea has to be thought through. The noises are different even if its quiet. It smells different. None of your favourite pictures are on the wall etc. You probably have emotional trauma from the house buying process. And its January so you can't even enjoy the garden or the local area.

It doesn't mean you've made the wrong choice. Take two weeks to find all the light switches/turn to the right cupboard. And as PP probably 6 months to feel "homey" again.

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explodingkitten · 22/01/2019 06:04

It always takes me around two yeard to start loving a new place.

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junebirthdaygirl · 22/01/2019 06:06

Have moved a few times. Things that helped were putting some of the same stuff in the same place eg..same stuff on the mantlepiece, same photos on the sideboard, same quilt cover on my bed, same cushions on the couch. I know you like new things in a new house but it really helped to have favourite familiar things around especially at first.
But give it time. Leaving your old home is a big wrench and moving is stressful so don't have any expectations of loving it for a while.

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AlanisM · 22/01/2019 06:14

Thank you all so much the encouraging posts. They give me hope that I will stop pining for my old house. Right now I just want to go back so much.

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Ladymargarethall · 22/01/2019 06:15

Explodingkitten thank you. I was beginning to wonder if I was odd.Grin

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UpTree · 22/01/2019 06:16

About 3yrs. But we moved area too so part of it was just wanting familiarity.

I just kept reminding myself why we moved.

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user1493413286 · 22/01/2019 06:32

We moved from a flat to a house for the space/garden/driveway and even though it’s much better practically I still miss my old place as it had so many memories and I’d feel relaxed as soon as I came in after work.
We’ve only been here a couple of months and I’m confident I’ll settle in soon and that if I was back in my old place I’d be fed up with the lack of space

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PenguinPandas · 22/01/2019 06:41

We moved homes and areas six months ago, also meant giving up my job and kids getting new schools. Loved new house straight away, its thatched and always wanted one but only just adjusting to new area for me has taken six months, kids and DH a lot quicker. Still getting head round work situation though have got new work in but now living in countryside and DH, DS and DD all much prefer it so do I but lack of work opportunities for me after having a really good, high paying job I have mixed feelings about.

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Ladymargarethall · 23/01/2019 06:33

Penguinpandas when we moved to this area it took me about five years to settle. Never did like the house.
Then I got a job locally and moved to a different house in the same town which was home straight away.
We are now in our third house in the same town and expect to stay here.
Moving to a new area can be really hard, especially if, as was the case here, locals aren't keen on incomers.

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PenguinPandas · 23/01/2019 15:53

Thanks LadyMH Locals are very friendly here, invited to 3 street parties this month and only about 15 houses and come round with spare apples and tomatoes but its almost too much. 😎 Better than unfriendly though.

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