House burnt down - starting interior almost from scratch - help!

[PhoenixFromTheAshes]

This is outing to those who know me (hi!) but I need some collective wisdom here. At the end of November, our house burnt down.

The family and even the pets all got out safely, only DH was in the house at the time, but we are now left with the aftermath of a huge insurance claim and a huge number of decisions to make!

We were left pretty much with the clothes we stood up in, the house is burnt out upstairs (attic rooms), smoke damaged and soaked in the middle floor and the ground floor is flooded.

Obviously the first challenge was keeping the children ok (we are in quite small temporary accommodation) and getting through Christmas, but now I have to push through the next bit.

We were insured. Insurance will cover all the contents and the cost of refurbishing / rebuilding the interior. I have a couple of weeks to put together what we want for the building tender. I need to make every decision from doors to windows to bathrooms to carpets and paint colours.

We love nature and spend quite a bit of time outdoors. It's a farmhouse, about a mile from the sea, set in fields. We previously had an engineered oak floor in kitchen, dining room and hall, beige ish carpets elsewhere. Previously the lounge was white (I know!), and it was pale yellow everywhere else except the stairs which were a fetching brightish green (thanks DH). I am ready for a change. For a soothing, more grown up space. The kids are now 9,9 and 4 - so we are planning to convert what was the playroom into a sitting room - the existing lounge will become the 'grown up' lounge. Also hoping to add some money of our own and add a utility room.

So I need ideas and advice. Specifically: Engineered oak floors - what to go for or even if these are a good idea. Carpets - what is nice and also stain proof and hardwearing. Underfloor heating? We currently had radiators but wondering whether to switch to underfloor in the downstairs and how the cost compares? Colours, flooring, carpets, bathrooms - any ideas everyone. And also any advice from anyone who has had to do similar!

Thanks in advance :)

Colours wise we like C170, C171 from here (we have to choose lime-based paints) along with some combination of the lighter shades?

cornishlime.co.uk/media/attachment/file/b/e/beeck_colour_card.pdf

To further add to the mix, DS1 has requested a purple bedroom, DS2 wants green (ok) and DS3 wants red. Red walls, red floor red ceiling. I am thinking maybe a pale colour with pops of red (?)

My DS1 wanted a red bedroom. He has a bright red feature wall and three white walls. We also added a red horizontal stripes on one of those walls where he hangs his sport memorabilia.

My DS2 has similar but with bright orange.

Wow cece, that sounds pretty dramatic! His previous room was sage green with seaside curtains - but he was a baby then and didn't have an opinion he could share! A red feature wall sound like a good idea - is your son's room big or small - my DS's room is quite small so I wonder if a red feature wall might be too much...

I'm so sorry this happened. It's my greatest fear so I'm glad to hear about yout life after the crisis, even if hectic. May i ask how it happened?

As to how to select all the millions of items for the rebuild, is be thinking about what i liked before (get the same again) and what i'd change... personally I'd miss my kitchen. It's old and irreplaceable. You can make things easy by choosing one flooring and one wall colour for the whole house (exceptingbathroom and kitchen).

Do you have an estimate for how long it will be until you can move back in?

Thanks dudsville, yes, it was a horrible shock. Our house was struck - twice - by lightning during the same storm. Just terribly bad luck. The roof caught fire. Because we had solar panels they couldn't put water on it for a while until they were sure the panels were safe. We had two bedrooms in the attic but all the water putting the fire out - and the subsequent month of a house with no roof on - has meant the interior of the house is a write off.

They have said 9 months to a year until we can get back in. We renovated the whole place 7 years ago when we first moved in! We absolutely loved the house. Just had a new roof too :( We're trying to stay positive for the boys but sometimes it all feels a bit overwhelming.

Are you planning on internal layout changes? If, God forbid, my house burnt down I would do things differently.

Just wanted to say our house burned down when I was a kid. Still remember the smell vividly. Memories of my mum painstakingly washing all the toys that survived and playing with half melted lego bricks for years.

Good luck with your choices. We've just finished a massive rebuild. You won't need to decide on colours for a while. Engineered wood is lovely.

We set up pintest boards for each room to save ideas. Also the app Houzz is good for getting ideas.

Phoenix, so apt, my eyes watered reading that. Like you did, we love our home. I've never feared fire before. It's a fear now because it matters. On top of the loss of your lovely home you are displaced for such a long time. My heart goes out to you.

What a terrible shock. Your username is wonderfully positive though!

The renovation 7 years ago could be a bit of a blessing in disguise. You'll have made a lot of decisions then - as a PP said, think about what you really liked, and just repeat, and things you weren't happy with and how you'd change them. Some things would have started wearing anyway by now from 7 years ago (silver lining?!).

Sounds like you have a clear idea of how you want the downstairs rooms to change/be configured. In terms of underfloor heating, from everything I've heard/read: definitely wet not electric (expensive), it has a comparable cost to rads, if you have concrete floor it may add height as it needs insulating so all the heat doesn't go into the concrete, but generally seems like a good idea!

For the children's bedrooms, I'd let them go with what they really want. It will help them settle back into the house, and as long as they like it that's all that really matters (I think!).

For colours/ideas, get on Houzz, Pinterest, just start pinning everything you like, themes will emerge!

Can't advise on engineered wood, there are a lot of super helpful people on here with ideas and experience, so I'm sure some more will be along soon.

MrsMoasty, possibly a couple of changes, but anything that would cost more than what was originally there we will have to fund so nothing spectacular. We are hoping to rebuild the old porch as a proper utility room. Other than that it is mostly just 'change of use' of a couple of rooms.

Neolara
Oh gosh so sorry to hear this happened to you as a child. I hope you don't mind me asking but was there anything that you would recommend or that really helped you as a child? We have painstakingly triple-washed DS1 and 3's favourite teds, and forked out a small fortune for an identical ted for DS2 (all of his things were lost in the fire), but any tips very welcome. We've replaced a few familiar things (like duvet covers and favourite books) and spent as much time together as a family as possible, while keeping their normal routine. But it's exhausting holding it all together.
The surveyor has asked for colours and finishes for every room, but you are right, I suppose the price is on the type of paint rather than the colour. I have started a Pinterest board - but there is sooooo much!

ItsLikeRain Thanks, that's really reassuring about the underfloor heating. Yes, we would go for water as we can then offset the cost of not replacing the radiators against the cost of the underfloor heating. Yes, I felt the same about the boys' rooms - they are finding it exciting thinking about what they'd like so I don't want to dampen their enthusiasm too much!

So glad there's a Phoenix rising from all this!

Sounds basic, but brainstorm exactly what you did and didn't like in the old house. And conversely, go round some new home showrooms or department store room-sets.
I was in a furniture store recently with a friend who loved the pendant-style bedside lights ..... but we both agreed it was the sort of thing you'd do if building/ renovating from scratch, as it'd be too much hassle replastering, painting etc just for a redecorate. So, be bold and install anything like that you really want now - otherwise it's easy not to do it later.

Equally, when I renovated I didn't have a specific look in mind ..... my big thing was having enough space & walls to put furniture against and layout the sofas / table etc in different ways if I fancied. I didn't have that in my previous open-plan layout. I also knew that buying a L-shaped sofa would have restricted my layout options more than a traditional 2/3 seater. So that was my priority - not necessarily "design".

Do the same for your kitchen & bathrooms ..... were you always retracing steps, or banging in to something.

The boy's rooms are both 12 foot square. It's a 1950s house so large windows. All the rooms are light and airy.

My dad went through a big insurance claim that ended up refurbishing most of his house so I feel for you. It's really not an easy thing to go through although dads house looks fab now.
Re: kids bedrooms - DS1 wanted a red and blue bedroom when we moved here I thought it would be too overwhelming so we painted it white but with big blocks and stripes of different blues (masking tape and tester pots) and bright red shelves, picture rail and fireplace.
The blocks and stripes aren't in a particular pattern but sit behind pictures or lead to edges etc it looks amazing and has grown nicely with him since I did it 5years ago. He's recently added a bright red metal locker cabinet for his sports gear and a white desk for his homework.

Having lived through a similar situation, my main advice would be, very strongly, don't let yourself get rushed and railroaded.

In ordinary, calm circumstances, there are just so many , many decisions to be made.
In these stressed circumstances, it's even harder.

Just say no, I'm not ready, I don't want to mess your around, so I simply have to take the time to be sure of my choices. So they get held up? So what? Any inconvenience to them is trivial compared to what your family is living through.

As you said, specify paint type: no need to choose colours at this point.

It's best to be sure about things that are harder to change later - electric sockets, and where the lights go. Don't assume that because it's still visible in a water damaged room where the sockets are, that they will get put back in the same place.

You will, I'm afraid, need to carve out chunks of time, every few days, to check on what they're doing, and compile an ongoing snag list.And insist it gets done to the standard it was before.

I would caution against your loss adjuster handing the whole project to a company that specialises in insurance renovations. These guys never have to get work from the public, and they never have to work for anyone twice. Long as they're cosy with the loss adjuster, they'll get lots of work. So they have no reputation to uphold. And they can be very crap indeed. Choose to use builders and professionals you've used before, or who come multiply recommended. And someone who regards YOU as a client to be pleased, not just someone working for the insurers, who couldn't give a darn if you're happy or not.

Once the specs been drawn up, and priced item by item, you should be able to negotiate changes - for example, if you can add money, you can go for a more expensive finish. Or if they've itemised £X 00 for flooring, if you can go round suppliers, and source flooring , in a sale or end of line, for £X minus 30 %, then you could put that money saved towards eg a more expensive bath.

Again, time consuming, but may be worth it.

And insist on eyeballing everything that's put in - oh yes, we'll get a absolutely same quality kitchen for you, yeah insist on seeing it , and checking it out for yourself.

Sorry if this all sounds negative. I've met one person who was delighted, and found it a smooth process. But, sadly, several like me, who found it stressful, and needed to be assertive.

The good thing for children, is the message that bad things can happen, and can be sorted out again. That's not a bad thing to learn young.

I was so glad that it taught me what was important: we walked away in the clothes we stood up in, but we all walked away.So didn't lose anything important.

And, if humanly possible, insist on being moved to better accommodation.
I understand if it's the only way to stay near work, schools etc. But don't let yourself be swayed by the insurance co having to shell out ludicrously high rent - they have to give you the same standard and size of accommodation, and if that's not available, they have to go better.

Sorry for multiple posts- more stuff keeps coming back to me.
I didn't know enough to insist on Building Control paperwork for every single thing they did, ( windows, electrics, etc). You're probably better informed, if you've done recent renovation work. Without the paperwork, your house can be harder to sell, should you ever choose to.

Op - I was 9 when our house caught fire. To be honest, from what I remember, it was more exciting than traumatic. In retrospect, my parents must have gone to great lengths to hide how stressful it was for them. My uncle and aunt had a big house so our family of 5 moved in with them. I shared a room with my cousin for 4 months which I remember very fondly. We'd always been the best of friends so it was great getting to hang out with her full time. I suspect it was much more difficult for my parents but I was largely oblivious to how they were feeling. I know it's a cliche, but kids really can be remarkably resilient. Other events later on, when adults were dealing with grief and obviously not able to cope, were much more scary and damaging.

Best of luck with the rebuild.

Definitely agree with everything Evidencebased says
I was so involved with my dads claim because he couldn't cope with the stress and the loss adjuster & the builders chosen added to that stress rather than relieved it. They actually ended up damaging work they had already done by being careless and only fixed it because we kept on top of them I got my dad to regularly take dates photos during the work which really helped show that they were being careless.

We had a big insurance claim as a child and had to move out for quite a long time. Ours wasn’t due to fire so not as traumatic as yours and it was stressful enough. I really feel for you and it must have been horrible to deal with. One thing I do remember though was our loss adjustor was a complete dragon and my parents had to fight hard for everything. They also were quite demanding about moving to comparable accommodation (first suggestion was not comparable at all) so it doesn’t seem right for you to be somewhere very small if you’re used to a big house.