Anyone else feel trapped in their housing situation?

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I am feeling really stressed about my housing situation.

A few years ago I bought a house. The problem is that I am in London so obviously prices are pretty crazy. In som ways I was very lucky to be able to buy anything at all, but the compromise was that the house is tiny and it was in pretty bad shape - basically i don’t think anything had been done to it since the 1960s or earlier. I did various cosmetic things to it to make it liveable, like painting (over horrid wall paper), ripping out the ancient carpets, etc. However, ultimately what the house needs is a complete renovation to bring it up to 21st century standards. It’s the kind of house that tenants would quite rightly complain about! Unsafe wiring, damp, etc!!!!

I had no money for renovations when I bought the house. I have just received a small lump sum that I could use to renovat the house - but to do that I would need to move out of the house (tiny terrace house so no way to live there while doing work to it) and I don’t think I could afford all the costs, and also, ultimately i don’t think I could project manage the work as I am a lone parent (no family help nearby) and even now I am struggling to juggle full time work with looking after dc.

Ideally I would buy a house that doesn’t need work but I don’t have enough money, particularly given the hefty stamp duty. I am also trapped in London because of work, DC’s school and DC’s father.

Is there way to stay locally in a cheap holiday cottage/Park home/air B and B during the winter for a few weeks while it's being done? January is a good time if you can find builders that are willing to do the work then. Not easy though.

That sounds really stressful. Would a flat be better - less big stuff to manage? I do appreciate the stamp duty issue though.

You don't have to do it all at once. Many, many people renovate a bit at a time as funds allow. Could you eg get builders round to do electrics and damp for now, or whatever is most urgent? Get a couple round to quote and see what they say. You don't have to go ahead with the work. Would you actually need to PM or do you just need a good builder? I assume remortgaging is not an option.

Could you get some equity out of the house by extending the mortgage a bit?

Could you rent a small space . For example, a studio flat on a short term basis until the worst of the work is done.

Are you talking total refurb. Pulling down old lathe and plaster walls etc? If not you can live in situ and the buiders can work around you especially if you are out all day. We used a microwave and a ring in the front room on top of a table and the bathroom for water /sink when our kitchen was being done. When the bathroom was being done the builders linked up the toilet at days end and I showered at work and took the DC to a friends and the local pool. Go on holiday for the worst 2 weeks. Our 3 bed huse rewire only took 2 and half days as the electricians worked really late.

My friend in SE London rented a caravan in the Camping Club site at Crystal Palace while the worst of her house was done.

It's not easy and is stressful but usually worth it to get it done.

You need to break the work down into manageable sections. 1st stage, 2nd stage etc.

1st stage is the underpinning. Damp course, electrics, plumbing and heating. You will feel a sense of achievement when this major work is done. Then take a break.

2nd stage windows doors woodwork refurbished.

3rd stage kitchen and bathroom

4th stage decor, carpets and furnishing

5th stage outside work.

You will find the time does go over quickly as you will be so busy, and get a great sense of achievement as well as a home to your specification, rather than moving, paying more money for that and wanting to change things anyway.

Moving costs are astronomical, so if you can make a refurbishment work for you, it’s a no brainier.

No, you are right, my only option is to refurbish. Or wait another eight years and escape London once dc have finished school!!

I feel trapped too - can’t afford to move from my small house in current area, can’t move to a cheaper area as DC school and DC dad are in current area.

I keep looking at rightmove to see where I can move when DC have left home.

Put everything you can into storage whilst you renovate and visit friends and stay over as often as you can. We managed to house sit for friends on separate occasions when the house was re-wired and again with kitchen and building work being done.

We are in a very similar situation to you OP. Been trying to move/build the courage to renovate for years. But the space is so tight. We are stuck - just as you describe.

We're also in London. It's not much comfort, I know, but I think many many people are in the same situation here at the moment.

How old are your children?

It sounds like it will be an extremely stressful time to get the house renovated, but could you endure a time period of super-stress for the end result of a safe house for you and DCs?

Could the chikdren stay with their dad whilst you do the reno work?

You can do it if you live there, It's not easy but it's easier and cheaper than being homeless or renting in London.

Pack as much stuff into boxes in the middle of the rooms as possible. Live in different rooms moving around with the builders, sleeping on air beds and cooking with a mini oven or slow cooker/microwave. It's grim, it's hard, can be cold and dirty, you may have to go to the launderette for a week or two, wear the same few clothes on repeat, eat your dinner and watch TV from your bed. But it can be done.

I've had two new kitchens and bathrooms amongst many other renovations and you will be left with a toilet and a sink each night. Just not necessarily in the same room 😂

As pp said rent a storage unit. Put everything into it except beds and enough clothing and kitchen implements to turn each room in turn into a bedsit for you and DC (you can do loads with a kettle, toaster and microwave provided you have running water). Most trades are really good about making sure you always have water and a toilet even when doing kitchen/bathroom renovations. See if you can line up a friend who will let you crash at theirs to give you a break. Then like PP said prioritise works so sort electrics plumbing damp first, then re-plastering, central heating (if it needs replaced/upgraded ) then redecoration, re-carpeting etc. It is amazing what you can do and you will have a real sense of achievement when it is done.

Might be worth you thinking of remodelling inside if your funds allow as it's often a good time to make the most of your space when everything needs done. Make sure you get planning permission and building control approval for any works done (you need consent to move kitchens or bathrooms, staircase, removal of interior load bearing walls and insertion of rsj's). Lots of builders will say you don't need approvals because then want the work and don't want the delay - if in doubt ring you local planners and ask.