Neighbours wanting us to move boundary

[silentseas]

We have a bit of a fraught relationship with our neighbours on one side. They are an elderly couple, he is in poor health and she is a very 'forthright' character.
A year and a half ago we got planning permission to extend our kitchen, this does encroach a little on their light as it is a solid structure rather than the conservatory that was there before. It also goes full width of our garden where previously there was a side return. Gardens are south facing. Our new kitchen wall on their side is within our boundary by a little way. There is a fence on the other side which they hang baskets for plants etc from.
We are about to do the last of the work involving builders and this includes rendering the wall on their side. They have previously asked if they can remove the fence and use the wall as their boundary. Our neighbours seem to think we have agreed to this although we made no response at the time and they have asked us to paint the rendered wall white. I am reluctant to let them do this as I think there is a potential they could damage the wall by hanging things on it and also that to allow them the extra bit of space creates a precedent that could cause problems if either of us want to sell. I feel there are legal implications to moving a boundary in this way but am not sure how much of an issue this will end up being.
My husband is inclined to compromise on a trellis against the wall but at the moment I don't want to agree as I feel it would put us in an awkward position in the future. I also feel they have a history of trying to get something out of it for themselves. They initially asked us to build the wall across the boundary so it could be used by them if they decided to extend, we couldn't do that as by that times the plans had gone through planning. They also replaced their fence and somehow got my husband to pay half- at this time we were on fairly good terms and I think he did it to keep the peace. I just feel this is another attempt on their behalf to piggyback on our plans at our expense and potentially to our detriment.
Any thoughts on this much appreciated.

To avoid drip feeding more details on history:
Right from the beginning they have been very vocal about the upheaval the building work would cause- before it had even started. We have a party wall agreement so all sewn up in that regard. The building work began in March 2017 and ended (temporarily) in September 2017. Even before it had started we were subjected to comments from our female neighbour over the fence moaning about noise which hadn't started yet and shouting at our eldest daughter from a window for making what was very mild noise in our garden. This upset her as she had always thought the neighbours were nice before (they had been previously) and we tried to shield the children from the unpleasantness. They have continued in this vein, talking about us whenever we were in the garden. Most of the time we roll our eyes and get on with it but it does take its toll. We have really tried to be sympathetic as they are at home most of the time but I really feel they started off from a defensive stance and have only got worse.

Personally I wouldn’t give any land away or change any boundary’s.
They sound cheeky enough to be using your new kitchen wall as a place to hang their plants on etc as if it’s their wall. You paid half the cost of the fence - make sure it goes back up.
You will need permission to go on their land once the fence is down to render/paint your wall. I would be painting it white to keep the status quo but i would use the outside masonary paint which has a high level of plastic in it and it lasts much longer than regular paint and does not get as dirty.
Then the fence would go back up.

If they continue to talk about you while in their garden i would either ignore it, or , talk about them at the same time or - if it’s really bad stuff- I would advise them that I would be logging thier behaviour with the local police station.

They sound like entitled CF neighbours to me and I would not give them any land.

No, I wouldn't move the boundary. They could paint the fence white and put trellis and hanging baskets on it. I don't really see what difference it would make.

No don’t move the boundary; unless you want to sell them that narrow strip of your land. I think you’re right that it could cause difficulties if you want to sell, or even if you need to do maintenance on your kitchen wall - they may not allow you entry to their garden to do it.

No chance - put the fence back up after painting and I'd let them attach stuff to the fence on the understanding that they fix any damage but not on my house wall

Thanks all that chimes in with what I thought. Talking to DH about it it occurred to me as well that a white painted fence would be no different to a wall in terms of light. Makes me suspicious there is another motive.
Thanks for all your replies.

If you are nervous about conflict then at the appropriate point in the build tell them you have spoken to your mortgage company and they have forbidden you from moving the boundary.

Don't change the boundary, it could cause problems in the future if the deeds show a different boundary to a verbal agreement between owners.

Same as PPs, don't even think about it. If you looked at your deads the boundary is marked on a map. This is fixed and will probably say something about a fence and who is responsible for maintaining it.

If they complain just explain that the boundary is a legal thing and not easily changed.

No, no, no, no no! don't do this.

A few years ago at one of my previous homes a neighbour who lived opposite me bullied his elderly neighbour into selling him half of her front garden, which he promptly turned into a driveway.
This meant she had two of their cars parked at the front of her house windows, with all the resulting noise, day after day.

When she died, her family sold the property, and the person who bought it then went into a legal battle to try and establish the original boundaries. They didn't succeed, but it caused an awful lot of problems and bad feeling.

What if your neighbours start drilling hundreds of holes for their hanging baskets?. What if the weight of those baskets affects the wall?

So please do not give or sell them that strip of land. I get the feeling they think they are owed it for some sort of compensation for having to 'put up' with your building works.

Get that fence up - a big one - and leave them to it.

Another one saying no. And make it clear that banging nails or drilling into the render and wall is not going to be tolerated and would be criminal damage. It's better if you can handle everything amicably, but if it becomes necessary you can get a court order to maintain the wall if they won't agree to you temporarily removing the fence panel.

What colour are you planning on having the render and are having something like K-rend where the colour is mixed in prior to application? I wouldn't be dictated to on colour either.

You would be mad to do this. Just say no

Maintain the boundary as it is.

Mend any damage to the current fence or replace it if you have to.

Paint their side of it white.

Nooooooo!! Don't do it.

Tell them your mortgage lender won't allow it or your solicitor has advised you not to.

My late wise father use to say to me never give any of your land away.

If you do this they will presumably want any fencing moved in line with your extension, also do you have any guttering on that side, if so that would cause issues if you give them the land.

Thanks so much to all. I am decided on not giving them the land and you have all given some good supportive ways to convince them it isn't just us being awkward.

100% absolutely not.
It matters not how vocal she is, it definitely isn't in your best interests.
She can hang her plants elsewhere.

My MIL did exactly what you are asking about - but she agreed to the fence removal.

Next thing the neighbours had drilled into her extension wall to hang their washing line hook which has caused cracks and damage to the render on the wall.