Nearly exchanging but dream house has come back on the market - WWYD??

[FusionChefGeoff]

Long saga involving a chain collapse and then a couple of months failing to put it all back together. So we moved on and found another option - it's really nice but there are the following compromises:

a) we'd need to knock through for a kitchen diner and don't even know if structurally that's possible. This is quite a big thing for me.
b) study would be upstairs not downstairs
c) it's 5 minutes and a busy road further away from our local centre
d) seller is very unreliable and no guarantees on the chain

Plus points:
a) giant master bedroom so I can have a super king size
b) en suite
c) huge driveway (other one is a squeeze for 1 car)
d) massive garden and we have 2 very active DC (5 and 3) so this is a huge plus point
d) nearly at exchange

My gut is to wave goodbye (whilst sobbing loudly) to the dream house.

but I don't want to

We want this to be our last move until kids have grown up so it's a big decision so any outsider perspective or questions to focus my mind??

What makes the dream house so perfect? Or is it a case of the second house being a compromise so you're remembering perfection in the first one?

Driveway and garden would push me to the ne you have at the moment. There is no substitute for either in my opinion.

The plus points of the house you are buying would outweigh the compromises for me.

You say you are nearly at exchange. How long is that likely to be? If your seller is unreliable and pulls out before exchange, the dream house might still be available as a back up?

Good point chicaguapa then we'd really know it was destined to be wouldn't we!!

We're answering final queries then waiting for the rest of the chain (4 in total) so could all still collapse.

The dream house has none of those compromises. Garden is big but needs work and isn't as huge as the other one. The master is smaller and not ensuite.

I need that sense of perspective that tells me these are not major compromises in the new house.

Long term could you put a kitchen diner extension out the back and turn the exsisting kitchen and diner into a study and a kids playroom?

So what's so dreamy about the dream house? The other one sounds pretty good to me.

Re knocking through for the kitchen diner, why are you worried? I've never not been able to knock through. It's just a case of working out the right support for the new structure.

The big garden and huge driveway are what would do it for me. Not having space to park your own cars is a pain and can lead to no end of falling outs.

Pick the one that will bring you joy - otherwise you might have regrets and life is too short for regrets.

I'd go and see the dream house again - it really doesn't sound all that from your description, in fact you have pointed out many ways in which it is not your dream house! Go again with a fresh pair of eyes, note all that is wrong with it and move on happily with the new better house.

Rizlett what a lovely, simple statement

There is definitely space to extend - it's already been extended but the garden is so big you could do more.

At the moment, what will bring me joy is to move anywhere! This has been dragging on for a year and I don't know if I could take it again if we pulled out but then the other one collapsed again.

Good idea about re-viewing to see faults but I'd be too scared I'd go the other way!

Don't be scared. You have to do what's right for you. We have just bought a house that I hated on viewing. It needed a lot of work and DH said I could do what I wanted and would surely love it once I had put my stamp on it. Guess what? Still hate it. Everything that I disliked is still there, even with all the time, effort and money poured in.

Go for what makes you happy. Don't settle when you don't have to.

Stick with the current new house not the dream house unless you're somewhere like London with better public transport links. You're expecting to live there till your DC are grown, that could mean at any given point possibly 3 or more cars assuming you and dh run one and the DC have one each.

Does the one parking space House have plenty of street parking?

If I were you I'd go back and view the dream house. It may actually help you to be happy with current one, rather than having a life time of imaginary regrets.

Bigger garden and drive would swing it for me.

We moved to an area where even the 2 bed houses have room for 2 cars on their drives because slaloming round parked cars is no fun. Also people vying for spaces is no fun.

We upgraded our king sized bed to a super king and now all 4 of us snuggle into it to watch tv. This includes Ds1 who is only 14 but taller than me!

Stick with the current house, if it falls through then it's not meant to be.

Good point about DC cars - hard to think like that when they're so little. We only have on street parking now and, tbh, I must be odd as it's never really bothered me that much so anything seems like a huge improvement.

Arghhh!!

Dream house is the perfect layout downstairs and has original features all over whereas new house is mostly extension so not so much character.

Dream House every time!

Especially if you plan to make this your last move!

You will always hanker after it and as and when faults will arise at the other one you will remember that the dram house wouldn't have this happen to it

What about your buyers? Will they wait if you have to catch up on the other one. Would you be able to buy the searches for dream house from the other buyers who pulled out etc. It may happen quite quickly.

I'd definitely go and see it again and see how you feel. You may be remembering it with rose coloured specs or it may be the ONE!

We pulled out of a purchase near exchange for a better property on the same road after being put off by sellers demands. Better layout, bigger garden, further from busy road and better view. No regrets here. Go with your heart.

Period features do look appealing but you can add a lot of charm to a newer space, i.e. high skirting boards, cornicing, ceiling rises, fireplaces etc.

This happened to us - we'd had an offer accepted on the dream house which then fell through due to vendors losing their property (and looking for something very specific so not likely to find something else in a hurry). We found a second house to offer on, which had a number of compromises but was essentially the un-extended version of the first house. This is also our forever home.

Vendors of the first house came back to us the week of exchange, and we did dither. But ultimately we decided to go ahead with the second house, as we were mentally and financially committed.

Ultimately, for us, it was the right choice. I had niggles about that first house until after we moved (weirdly, the new buyers are friends of friends) and I went to have a look at it from the road. Walked home feeling really happy we made the right choice! Our new home is smaller but a much better location and garden, and with more potential to add value.

So I'd say think carefully about the pros and cons, do lists, etc, but do consider whether this is "the one that got away" or whether there is substance to your feelings. What's your heart saying?

I would stick with you're house you are about to exchange on. I would have viewed losing the dream house in the first place as a divine intervention - that house is not meant to be yours. You've found an alternative - which sounds better in some ways - and you are about to complete. You say at the moment, what will bring me joy is to move anywhere - imagine pulling out of exchanging on this house (and pissing everyone off in that chain with all the karmic repercussions that might entail) and then there being some enormous delay or hurdle to completion with the so called dream house.