Which of these houses would you pick for your Forever Home?

[TisapityshesaGeordie]

I should start by saying we haven't offered on either yet, so there's a good chance we'll get neither!

We currently live in a small city outside London, and we love it here. DH commutes in daily - train journey is under 30 mins. I'm a SAHM, DD is 5 and at an Outstanding primary school that she (and we) love. DS is 3 and at an Outstanding nursery down the road from DD's school, at which he's pretty much guaranteed a place next year thanks to the sibling rule. We've accepted an offer on our current house, and our chain is complete - they're just waiting for us.

House A is on the outskirts of a different town, about 5 miles away from where we are now. It's huge - 1000 sq feet more than we have now, and their asking price is £15k under our maximum budget. I absolutely love it - it's pretty much my dream house, or as close as I'll get to it in this part of the world with a limited budget. It's on a quiet street near a river and a nature reserve.

However. It's at least a 20 min walk to the station - which is a stop further down the line then we are now. DH's train journey would be closet to 40 mins, and with that and the longer walk he'd never see the kids before bed - which he loves to do. He leaves very early in the morning so is gone before they're up - he'd have an even earlier start if we move here.

The local primaries are fine, so we could move DD - but if we decided not to (because her current school really is amazing), I'd be driving the school run at peak times on a busy commuting road every day - 6 times a day for the first year while DS is at nursery.

The local secondary is Outstanding, and less than half mile away.

A smaller factor to all this is that I'm very active in our local theatre which currently a 20 minute walk away. Moving here would make this much more problematic as DH wouldn't be home in time to let me get away. Other things like play dates and nights out (we don't have many but enjoy them when we do) would be more problematic - although there are plenty of kids activities and bars and restaurants in the nearby town; it's not like we'd be moving to the middle of nowhere.

Have I mentioned it's my dream house?

The other house, House B, is round the corner from where we are now. It's handy for school, the station and the city centre. It's a nice house - very nice - and is about 400 sq feet bigger than we have now, so big enough, but not huge. It doesn't put us in the right place for the best secondarys in the area, but the nearest ones are still good. You'd have to work hard to find a bad school round here tbh.

Downsides are it's right on a busy main road - and round the corner from the hospital, so you'll have siren noise at all hours; has only on street parking (which is always tight round here), and I don't love it. Can't imagine spending the rest of my life in it. DH likes it more though. Its asking price is right at the top of our budget.

Well done if you got through all that! What do you think?

It rather has to be a forever home, Oleanna, or we'll still be paying off the mortgage in our 70s.

I'd go b. Specially as you said you don't love driving. It looks as if you could convert the front garden to a drive. Ok it wouldn't look as lovely but I think it'd be worth it.

I think lifestyle is really important, it's not just being home for bed time. The extra time on the commute will really add up (and may be more expensive too). The walk is probably manageable in summer but how about winter, when it's dark both ends of the day. Your social life would suffer too.

I wouldn't think too much about secondaries right now, a lot could change. If I had to move my child at.primary age I would, bit I think it's far from ideal especially as she sounds settled in a great school.

And honestly I think b is much nicer ;)

House B even if it wasn't in St Albans! Lived there years ago and it was literally the nicest town I've ever lived in.

I would live in Harpenden for this house

OP - it's well over budget, so don't click on the link if it will make your decision harder, it's just some lovely property porn for the rest of us

House B is much nicer imo

B.

They're both lovely but you get a utility room with A.

Your kids aren't young forever so the ferrying around period does end.

And the garden for B isn't that big - certainly smaller than A - and with steps down which might get annoying. (I think you said you wanted a bigger garden).

I don't think that any of the secondaries in St Albans are bad though are they? You're pretty much given the choice of really really good, really good and good

This is nice but assume you've already discounted it

B.
I like the actual house more than house A,
Longer commute wear on you after a while, especially if he's a hands on Dad, he'll miss the kids. 500 sqft is neither here nor there when it's a 4 bed house with room for each child to have their own space.

Keep looking or go for House B. Location, location...

I would always always go for B. 1000 sq ft is the size of our entire.4 bed house, surely you don't need that much more space? DH being home quickly is so valuable. The ferrying around period won't last forever as a PP said, but it will last a good 8 years if you're having to drive DC to primary school on a crappy route.

We chose a slightly less ideal house because we wanted a very specific area for primary catchment and so DH can walk to work. Haven't regretted it for a second. It's our lovely home now.

House b looks nicer to me?

Have you thought about waiting a year so you'll have less of a crazy time of ferrying small kids between nursery, school and home? You'll have to market your house again but it'll give you the space to look for a more suitable house.

The ceiling of the lift room in house A looks awfully low. Can you stand up in there? Perhaps it's the angle of the photo

Found B to be of higher quality in standard added to general location, lesser travel time and more suited to the current needs you have described. Go for A if you believe the compromises are worth it, it is important to have the feel as they say and you know if it is worth it 😉

House B might be bigger but the layout is dodgy - unles you don't use the front door and always enter thru the car port?

I'm not made keen on either to be honest.

@OlennasWimple now that is a nice house!

B is the better looking house. IMO.

Atm I live in my dream house an hour away from where I work and look forward to the day when I move. It's too far from work. It's a journey you do 10 times a week. It has a big impact on your life. That's my view anyway... think about your every day life not just the house

house a no question and gorg garden your dc will love.

B because of DH's time with the dcs/it doesn't all fall on you & location is at the heart of things for all of you, for a long time.

I like the other one PP linked too.

I would go B or rent until you can get another property in St Albans. It is such a lovely place. If you love a town and are happy there you really shouldn't look at houses further afield- there will always be bigger, nicer houses. You love living there for a reason, it works for the whole family. B is a great house but in all honesty would be better if it had a larger kitchen. Prices may well go down over the coming year, could you rent and see what happens? You could even rent in Harpenden to see if that location works for you.

I honestly think that the quality of life you have in a place matters enormously. Length of commute, good local community, friends nearby - these things take years to develop and are really important. I'd vote for B. I can see the attractions of A, but what could be more important than your partner seeing his kids?

I know of a woman who has become enormously wealthy by marriage who now lives in what is essentially a palace - I'm talking multi, multi millions worth of house. But she can't actually do anything normal any more. To be honest, the house doesn't really make it worthwhile. I can say, hand on heart, I wouldn't swap her life for mine.

Thanks all. Lots to think about, but I'm leaning towards B or neither. I don't think what we'd gain in terms of house is worth what we'd lose in terms of quality of life.

DH doesn't think the main road is actually that busy, and pointed out that the hospital doesn't have an A&E and the Minor Injuries unit there isn't 24 hours, so the ambulances won't be going all night. The house also has planning permission for a kitchen extension and a dormer in the loft, which would solve a couple of the issues.

House B definitely - central location, short commute, looks like it's near a park, lovely smart house that you won't have to spent time & money on. If it has good double-glazing then being on a well-used road shouldn't be an issue.