How do you get over the fear of spending on large purchases?

[ShotsFired]

We are thinking about a largish house purchase. It will be immediately useful and value adding, and will remove a source of current domestic frustration.

But it's bigger than anything I have bought before (apart from the actual house!) and I have long been a hoarder/saver rather than a spender. I have the entire cost of the thing in cash (although am splitting 50:50 with OH who lives with me)

So, housey MNers, please talk me down from my vague and ill-defined worries about spending my lovely hoarded money when logically it is the right thing to do and will benefit us. How did you reconcile it in your head?

If it's "useful, value adding and will remove a source of current domestic frustration" I can't understand why you're even worrying about it. It seems really odd to "hoard money" when you could spend it on something that would benefit you AND add value.

I suppose I tend towards the Eeyoreish way of thinking - from being single/alone most of my life I only ever had me to rely on if the roof fell in or the boiler exploded or whatever so I was always conscious of putting money away to ensure I would be ok.

I just find it hard to deal with and I can't be alone in that, even if it does seem inexplicable or odd to you (maybe I am not explaining it very well )

I totally understand. We are close to selling our house and have had an offer accepted on another. It will mean quite a big increase in our mortgage but we need the extra downstairs space as currently have the 4 of us annoying each other in one space!
We plan to modernise the house and enjoy living there while our family grow up so I think it's worth it as it will only increase in value.

Have to say though we are so close to getting it now and every day I have a little wobble about the money side of things but just got to go for it!

Do you mean you're buying an actual house or is it something for the house like a combo boiler or new kitchen? Or a detached garage/drive way?
I think the main thing is to know that the money spent wouldn't add value if it wasn't something useful. As long as it's something you'll use then it won't be a mistake! The main thing is just to be satisfied with your decision, don't keep revisiting it once you've decided!

@johnd2 sorry yes my OP was a bit unclear! I am buying a thing for the house.

The main thing is just to be satisfied with your decision, don't keep revisiting it once you've decided!
Aha - I think this is probably a key factor in my worrying. We're still speccing it out properly so it's a bit up in the air till the design is done and dusted. Thank you for the unexpected insight!

If the work adds value then the money is still yours, just in property not a savings account. Plus you have made more money by doing the work (so way better than savings in fact!) That is how I think of it. Yes it is harder to access, yes the value may go down as well as up, but no money is completely safe really

I'm a bit funny about money in that way, although weirdly not on big house purchases, such as a range cooker or new windows where I seem to be quite happy to 'go for it' (perhaps appreciating that it does add value to the house) but on small purchases (just spent about an hour on ebay searching the best price for a cupboard knob costing £5!!).

@heffalumpshavewrinkles If the work adds value then the money is still yours, just in property not a savings account.

That is also a good way to look at it thank you.

Thanks for all the replies everyone, I feel a bit less of a freak now!