So have you ever seen a more wanky estate agents write up?!!

[Honeyandfizz]

Browsing my local area as have just sold and spotted this gem of a write up by the local agents.......ever seen such unnecessary drivel?!!

I present you with this (WTAF??!)....

Wank

Ha! Yes, have just looked at its' location on the map! It's a stretch calling it Sutton Coldfield tbh!

It's got us talking and looking at the property so it's a strategy that works! It may result in a viewing as a result.

Turquoise, I know! My sister has a house a third the size of mine for almost double the price. Unfortunately her DPs job is London centric and so is her outlook

I would be fuming...

I was distracted from all the nonsense prefaces by the fact that one of the houses was on "Bumbank Road" until I pushed my varifocals back up my nose

Oh this has to be the best though, you could not make this shit up could you?! Best of it is the area is very deprived certainly not the good life.

DO YOU DREAM OF LIVING 'THE GOOD LIFE' WITH A BIT OF LAND TO CALL YOUR OWN?? VEGETABLE PATCH, FARM ANIMALS AND FRUIT TREES?? YOU MAY NOT BELIEVE IT, BUT ITS ALL AVAILABLE IN THE CITY........ SHORT HEATH ROAD IS A HOME EVEN THE GOOD'S WOULD LIKE TO CULTIVATE!
BARBARA AND TOM STRUGGLED TO BECOME SELF-SUFFICIENT - BUT FOR YOU IT WILL BE A DODDLE WITH THIS PROPERTY!!

That is one bored estate agent...

No way!!

And the 0.00 x 0.00

Errrr has no one else noticed the ghost in the garden in picture 9?????

Maybe it's the wizard?

I thought the agent was going to be Chewton Rose from the thread title. I used to love reading their blurbs as they were so ridiculously pretentious. They tend to do them in the style of an article in a wanky home decoration magazine, complete with interviews with the owner.

I particularly love it when 'the owners survey their extensive grounds' - which when you look at the details is an averagely-sized back garden!

Look at all the other properties from that agent. They've all got the same wanky preamble!

Same type of wanky preamble!

I thought it was going to be Chewton Rose too! Tres wanky.

Colombian Marching Powder has a lot to answer for...

Is the EA for real? Who finds them professional enough to list with them ??