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When downsizing is on the cards

84 replies

Monkeypuzzlesandwich · 09/05/2016 06:42

...and you have grown up children and no other half - so the world is basically your oyster..where do you go? Flat in a city or a house by the sea?

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whattodoforthebest2 · 11/05/2016 23:43

I mentioned it but I don't think it sank in. DD is full of positive thoughts about it though, so that's helping me to focus. Yes, I feel partly excited and partly apprehensive about moving away. I have mixed memories here, it was a big upheaval when we moved here and then got divorced. It didn't go according to plan at all. I have a few friends dotted around but everyone's doing their own thing and I need a new start somewhere else I think.

It's time for me to step out of my comfort zone. Feel the fear and all that.

Monkeypuzzlesandwich · 12/05/2016 06:27

Let us know how the viewing goes whats. How lovely that your daughter is supporting you. Must be good to know she is not overly attached to the house or area. Have you considered selling and renting in an area first to get a feel for it? Might also put you in a stronger position when the right house comes along. It's something I'm considering.

Today I'm getting my house valued. Step 1!

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shovetheholly · 12/05/2016 08:07

My DH has been working on downsizing and provision of different kinds of accommodation for older people. He reckons the number one mistake a lot of people make is not to think about contingency (because, let's face it, people are in their prime when they retire now and no-one wants to think about a future where they might be ill or less mobile!). Being really close to services so that you can get about easily without a car, being close to shops, and being in a community where you're not going to be isolated are things he bangs on about a LOT! Also, being in a home that is easily adaptable. A cute, picturesque cottage might sound lovely, but it could be a nightmare if you need a stair lift...

Monkeypuzzlesandwich · 13/05/2016 12:14

Have you had the viewing whats?

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GETTINGLIKEMYMOTHER · 13/05/2016 19:46

I am not anti bungalows in principle - was just saying how lack of stairs affected my folks' fitness over maybe 3 years. Which was a thing they never thought of when buying, and didn't even realise until they had stairs again.

whattodoforthebest2 · 15/05/2016 19:19

Hi Monkey, I decided to just drive down and have a look around in the end. The area is OK, but although the house is just the sort of thing I like, the downsides are the local parking and lack of garden. It's a shame, it could be such a pretty house, but I can see why it's been on the market for so long.

However, I got a chance to have a good look around a few towns along the coast, Worthing looks nice and there are lots of Victorian houses there, so hopefully when I get a bit further along, I'll have a better idea where I'm looking and what for etc.

By the way, I used to live where you are, small world eh? (Noticed you on another thread) Smile

Monkeypuzzlesandwich · 15/05/2016 19:51

Hey whats thats good to hear, research is key with a move like this.

Very small world! I have to say I really like it round here it has a good mix of being close to London and close to the countryside. I don't want to downsize here (mainly because I won't get much for my money) but I have always felt quite drawn towards the water. I had my house valued the other day which was what I expected. We often get leaflets through the door to say 'someone is looking for a house just like yours..' but I tend to take those with a pinch of salt. Im tempted to put it on the market just to see what interest it generates.

Might have a look on rightmove at Worthing.

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Sounbelievablydull · 16/05/2016 22:49

What about the best of both?
My parents had a small house in London and bungalow right beside the Atlantic in the west of Ireland. Very very cheap there atm
They spent the winters in London summers in ireland. Seemed a really perfect retirement

Monkeypuzzlesandwich · 17/05/2016 06:45

If only! It comes down to money I'm afraid. I'm on my own too and wouldn't want the maintenance of two properties even if I could afford it.

In a perfect world I'd have a bolt hole in London and maybe Sandbanks! Wink

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magimedi · 17/05/2016 17:07

For those of you who are thinking of Worthing, please be aware of the hell that is the A27. It's a bad road for most of its length but around Lancing, Worthing & arundel it is hellish. I've done Eastbourne area to Portsmouth twice already this week I I always think I would hate to live in Worthing with that road to be contended with every time I need to go any distance.

irregularegular · 17/05/2016 21:50

I'd stay where my friends are. Harder to make new, good friends later in life. Walking distance to local shops, public transport etc. Quiet with a lovely view. Sea etc nice but not essential.

whattodoforthebest2 · 18/05/2016 09:56

I've considered buying two small places, but they'd have to be quite a distance from the South-East for me to be able to afford them on my own. Actually that could be ideal, a tiny place in Cornwall or Ireland for example and somewhere within a shout of London so that I can see my DC when they're around. I'm not sure that it would work in practical terms tho'.

Tbh my friends are nearly all married couples (and younger than me) with a different agenda - I wouldn't have a problem with going somewhere new. I'd find a job and do volunteering and I think that would hopefully sort out the social side of things.

Thanks for the comments about the A27 Magimedi. It has been appalling every time I've driven on it, so that's definitely a consideration. Such a shame that a key route like that can't be more efficiently run.

cestlavielife · 18/05/2016 10:40

i foresee hopefully making new friends thru U3a, meetups, local community groups etc... good friends i have to arrange to see anyway (everyone has diff responsibilities) and that wont change if an hour or so away. of course if you lucky enough to be in a street where you drop in to friends all the time that would be different...and i probably wouldnt consider downsizing away...

monkeypuzzlesandwich · 18/05/2016 10:52

Making friends has never been an issue for me I've had to do it a few times in my life. Like you say cest most of my close friends i have to organise to meet up with anyway -and as time has gone on its got further and further apart. Where I live would have no impact on that.

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Monkeypuzzlesandwich · 29/05/2016 19:22

Hey whats (waves) Grin any luck with finding any houses/desirable areas near the sea??

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whattodoforthebest2 · 30/05/2016 09:48

Hi Monkey (waves back) Grin

I haven't had a chance to do much searching, but fell in love with this

www.rightmove.co.uk/property-for-sale/property-53742184.html

It's a bit further away than I'd planned to be, but I'd put up with it! Comments about the M27 traffic are in the back of my mind tho' and I'm not sure if it would be suitable for a dog, but it's a wonderful house.

How are your plans coming along Monkey? Are you on the market yet?

Monkeypuzzlesandwich · 30/05/2016 10:34

My word it's utterly stunning and not a million miles away from the sea either.

I've had my house valued and the houses seem to sell pretty quick round here (I know you are familiar with my area). BUT an old friend has expressed interest in my house so I may be able to sell without it going on the market providing we can agree a price - it will save money all round if we can pull it off.

So now I'm actively looking and starting some viewings next week.

When is it you are planning to put your place on the market? Have you had a valuation?

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percybs73 · 30/05/2016 10:50

There are some lovely bungalows in Hassocks, a village just north of Brighton with a good mix of ages, shops and transport links.
We downsized our in-laws there and I made them list top priorities, which they disagreed on continuously!
Her top points were - walk to shops, feeling of space, big kitchen etc but they found it really hard to have so many options, we ended up making the decision.
I would keep doing as you are - using his process as a good excuse to explore areas, maybe rent a place in Brighton for a week to see if you like it, it is hell in the summer so consider the edges.

whattodoforthebest2 · 30/05/2016 11:13

I'm still decorating at the mo, so nothing's going to be happening for a while, marketing-wise. I've got quite a lot going on over the Summer, so not sure about timescale at all really.

Thanks for your ideas, Percy, I agree that renting for a while would be a good idea, an apartment really appeals but a number of friends have said 'make sure you get a house, not a flat' (ref proximity of neighbours, noise etc), so renting would make sense, particularly as I'm in such a peaceful area now, if I looked at Brighton it would be quite a shock to the system. I was down there yesterday and it was heaving. Mind you, I love the atmosphere and hustle and bustle. Being at least a bus/cycle ride away would be a good idea, methinks.

Monkey - selling to a friend would be a result, wouldn't it? All sorts of advantages there I'm sure. How exciting!

(looks forward to MonkeyPuzzle housewarming Grin)

magimedi · 30/05/2016 11:18

That apartment looks lovely - but it seems quite isolated.

As ShovetheHolly said (further up thread):

"the number one mistake a lot of people make is not to think about contingency (because, let's face it, people are in their prime when they retire now and no-one wants to think about a future where they might be ill or less mobile!). Being really close to services so that you can get about easily without a car,"

whattodoforthebest2 · 30/05/2016 11:31

That's true, Magi. At the moment I'm a lazy bugger and drive everywhere, even though I'm within walking distance of the shops, station etc. So my thinking was, what's the difference between this and being more remote? But of course, it's between choosing to and having no alternative. I'd like to think I'll still be pootling around in a car in 20 years' time, but of course having shops etc nearby would be sensible.

magimedi · 30/05/2016 11:50

I sure hope you are still pootling round in a car for many more years.

But, as well as having to give up driving for ever, there can be instances of no driving for a month/6weeks for health reasons. DH had a small stroke about 10 years ago & was not allowed to drive for a month. I was happy to drive, but he was very pleased to be able to walk out for the paper/pint of milk/ go to the doctor etc etc.

I am outside Eastbourne & love it.

I am a short train ride from Brighton & I love going over for the day or to evening stuff, but I would not want to live there.

The other thing that would worry me about that apartments is what the neighbours were like!! In a set up like that they would be far harder to ignore, than if you were in a terrace. Noise could be an issue with either of them but I think they could be far more 'in your face' in that syately home!!

Monkeypuzzlesandwich · 30/05/2016 12:18

I think a house generally requires more upkeep than an apartment and after years of decorating and maintaining a property and a garden I'm not sure it's something I want to carry on with. I want something low maintenance so I can travel and just generally relax!

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Savagebeauty · 30/05/2016 12:22

How exciting! I'm doing similar. Just sold large 5 bed in SW London and renting small 3 bed house for 18 months till ds goes to uni.
Looking to buy 4 bed in Yorkshire ( cash) and semi retire.

magimedi · 30/05/2016 12:23

Oh not so much flats in general, just that particular set up - it would worry me that Penelope Keith would come trotting out & give me the residents rules (or Hyacinth Bucket ) Grin.