Cold feet on house purchase

[Tobermory]

We have had oour house (our house is my family home and we moved in after my parents died 8 years ago) on the market since late last year after we viewed a house and fell in love with it. Perfect area, Well almost and fairly good location.. House beautifully presented (this probably influenced us) and lots of features we liked. We were stretching ourselves financially though. Our house sale fell through so we lost it.

Fast forward a few months, we viewed house B. It was the wild card in a Saturday of back to back viewings. Not convinced by its location, not as familiar with the town and its on a main road plus it was on at the top of our budget. The house was amazing. Just amazing. I walked round in awe at this stunning property. I walked down the stairs and felt 'wow' . Room sizes, features, space, garden.... Just amazing. We went back for a second view, I still really love it though will be a very very different way of living. Old house, main road, more industrial area, not as country. (I hated the country village where I was brought up-too quiet and remote) I loved it but remained apprehensive.
We put in a v cheeky offer and they accepted!

I don't know why I remain apprehensive. We've revisited the town (big village) and it felt really nice. The house is on a main road (and not a v pretty one) albeit set back and elevated. The garden is big and private.
The house could see us good for many many years, there's scope to add value/extend. There's lots of space.

So why am I feeling so concerned? Tonight's woorry, is there space in kitchen for a table and a sofa?! (Ridiculous I know)
I don't know how much my concerns are justified (ie were making a mistake) or if it's a reaction to leaving my childhood home for ever.

Sounds like you're apprehensive because it will be a big change for you. You have memories where you are now and this is something completely new. However, the house would appear to meet most of your needs and you obviously loved it when you viewed, so be gentle on yourself. Do you want to move? Do you think you need a new start? Is the real issue, you can't bear moving from your current home?

If it's any consolation, I moved to a new town two years ago, having lived in my previous town for 30 years. I moved to an older doer-upper house with lots of space but had been used to modern houses. I would struggle to put a table and chairs in my kitchen, but I did have one in my last house. However, we are now extending the kitchen so that won't be a problem much longer. The other big concern was I moved from a cul-de-sac to a main road. Yes, it's a little noisier but we are set back from the road, my garden is secure and not much road noise there and we have plenty of parking. Parking in the cul-de-sac was a nightmare but now we don't have any issues at all. I love it here and have no regrets.

Thanks spickle, your post gave me things to think about.
I absolutely DO want to move. Our house has been good for us, but I really want to live somewhere new, a new place and a new home. I think our family would gain from being somewhere new and different.

This move was prompted by me, had to seriously persuade Mr Tobermory, but maybe I am just scared of change. Also scared of making the wrong choice for my children, last move was pre children so different priorities!

I moved with two very unwilling adult children 23 and 20 at the time. Obviously didn't have to worry about schools but was dragging them away from everything they were used to, friends, social life, etc, even though we only moved 10 miles from the old place, but DS hated change and refused to come and view the house right up until after we had exchanged and it became a done deal! However, both are now very happy here and have no regrets. A friend of mine emigrated to Canada with two unhappy teenagers - they also have no regrets though it took a while to settle. They love it so much now they'll not come back to the UK. Do what you feel you must and although there will be concerns regarding perhaps new schools, new friends etc, children usually adapt very well.

You're right, children do adapt and mine are young enough to have lots more growing/experiences in a new home.

Why don't you tell us more about your new home, and we'll tell you how marvellous it sounds and how jealous we are

Hm, ok.

its late victorian and the current owners told us it was built for lieutenant from the area. the house is on three stories with big rooms and high ceiling, loads of original features like sash windows and fireplaces. It has the most amazing ornate plaster work on the lower half of the walls and detailing on ceiling. (I didn't even realise I was as a fan of this till I looked the house, I foundit literally jaw dropping!) I've always wanted a traditional hallway front door, stairs and somewhere for a console table etc (we currently don't have stairs!) The kitchen has been remodelled to convert the back two rooms and is very modern in design. The back patio has the original wash house (complete with drain, water pump and mangle!). Long term we could extend behind the kitchen if we needed more living space.

Big garden which is all behind the house so less impact from road noise, it's a mixture of grass, fruit trees and shrubbery.

We would need to add another loo, probably on the third floor, as there is only one in the house

As I type all this I'm excited about it, about all it's features and interesting bits. I'm excited about the prospect of moving in and making it look like our house (apprehnsive too as we've never lived in a periods property!)

Crikey - new house sounds amazing! Am quite jealous (we're hopefully moving to a victorian house but previous owners have pulled out most of the original features - grrr). Tbh it would be weird if you didn't have some doubts about the whole thing though.. You're not only leaving your own home, but your parent's home too and that is emotional of course. The new place sounds like a wonderful home for your children to grow up and develop their own memories though.

i moved last year from a 2 bedroom terraced we had lived in for 13 years to a 4 bedroom detached house that needed loads of work and i was crying leading up to completion and moving day, i was so attached to my old house. i adore my new house now and barely think about the old one. Enjoy your new home.

Tbh it would be weird if you didn't have some doubts about the whole thing though.... This.

Maybe I need to hand onto this, given the emotional history of my current house, moving to anywhere else will inevitably have doubts.

The 'new house' is now on right move as SSTC....not that I check daily!

Hang onto that idea...not hand onto it!!

It sounds absolutely wonderful. I've never lived in a house like that - I would really love to.

Before we moved here, we lived for 20 years in a flat in a wonderful location (Kensington High St!). We were amazingly lucky to live there, and it was a real wrench to move. (Not as much as you are experiencing, but still..) Not just missing the flat and being in the centre of everything, but leaving behind the freedom of our pre-maternity youth in exchange for a suburban semi.

I still miss it. But, you know, not in a way that makes me enjoy our current place any less. That flat was perfect for then; this house is perfect for now. I am deeply appreciative that I have been able to live in two places I loved, that were right for different periods of my life.

It sounds like that's how you might be feeling in a year or so

PS. Room for a spaceship in your new gaff?

Hopefully that serene feeling of 'it's right' is exactly how we're all feeling in 12 months.

Ha, your amazing house link! If the spaceship doesn't pan out then DH would be happy with a victorian style green house to grow stuff, building dens in the gardens for the girls and being allowed to have chickens!

We're just discussing ornate plaster work and colour schemes

That looks like a great house, something you can really make your own

You're bound to be worried. 8 years is a long time to live somewhere, especially if it was your parents' home too. You do sound like you're ready for a change though!

Oh wow. What a house OP!

I understand why you are worried. I am about to exchange tomorrow, selling my beautiful Victorian terrace and buying an ugly 1960s house. I have been doubting if this is the right decision - periods of excitement interchange with an utter panic. As long as I am excited, even for short period of times, I feel I am making the right decision. Even though I am scared of making a mistake and thought of pulling out, there is this very silent gut feeling somewhere which keeps me going. It was diferrent with the first property I was buying - I don't remember feeling the excitement, and the property was wrong for me.

Meadow, exchange tomorrow ...o my gosh. I can completely empathise with these extreme emotions; today I have swung wildly from what are we doing terror(when DH text me at work to say it was now listed at SSTC) to I'm so excited and thinking colours and what furniture should go where!

Hope tomorrow goes well for you.
How long for you between exchange and completion?

If we exchange tomorrow, completion will be in 2 weeks. I had pulled out of numerous house in the past (abt 4 or 5) cos it did not feel right. The one I bought previously, ticked boxes but had brought up some issues in the survey and I felt uneasy up until completion, but did not have the courage to pull out, and the house caused me so much stress afterwards, it probably just wasn't right for me. The one I am buying is far from ideal and probably not forever house, and I kept looking for an alternative, but could not find anything that felt more right than this one. I have even created a plan B - if I am unhappy in the new house after 12 months, I am going to sell it. I have a feeling (or hope?) it won't happen though :)

I need to be in the right mood to exchange. At times I just don't feel I can say Yes please go ahead, to my solicitor. At other times, I feel Omg the sooner the better. It helps to stay away from my current house - everything looks more objective from aside.

OP don't feel guilty if you decide to pull out; otherwise, go away from you current house and see what your objective mind says.

Oh no, did I miss the link? I'll have to dream...

Devora I got scared that posting a couple of internal photos or the house might somehow lead to me losing the house(I don't know how!) so asked MNHQ to remove them.

I thought so! Don't worry, I've already developed a rich inner vision of your house...

Sounds lovely. Now you've exchanged, can you link pretty please?

meadowquark doe did today go? Have you exchanged?!

Yes, we have exchanged! I honestly thought I will feel horror of OMG what have I done?? However I feel relieved and a tiny bit excited about the fresh start in the new house. My new house is not so exciting but I hope I will feel the benefit once we are nearer secondary school time (we will be in the catchment). So far so good. Getting busy with organising removal, no time for regrets.

OP your situation is slightly diferent as the house you are buying is lovely.

Well hurray for your exchange, glad you feel excited!

devora would've sent you a copy but not possible!