Please or to access all these features

Add post

Watch this thread

Save thread

Start a new thread

Flip thread

Hide thread

My feed

Active Unanswered threads

Getting started FAQ's

Unanswered threads Acronyms Talk guidelines

Hide shortcut buttons

Talk

Property/DIY

Join our Property forum for renovation, DIY, and house selling advice.

Flip

Original poster

Should I move?

17 replies

passingcloud · 02/08/2014 00:07

Hello, feeling a bit overwhelmed and would love any advice, if anyone has time to offer some. And I hope I don't sound spoiled for posting this (which I will). But: fairly recently, we moved to a house that we fell in love with at first sight. It's beautiful, 4 bed, etc. But because of various factors, I didn't have much of a chance to pay attention to the area. The result: we moved in, and I hated it. Life's been pretty miserable since then. It feels like there's nothing here for me. Apparently lots of other people in our situation are moving into the area (so say the estate agents) and it's going to change…but who knows. We are seriously weighing up whether to cut our losses and leave a house that DH loves but which (despite it's many attractions) I'm just not happy living in because of the area… or should I just be more grateful for what I've got and not think of putting us through the whole horrible shebang again. The other option is to move to a much 'cooler' area, where loads of people we know are moving to…where we'd end up in in a much smaller house/garden, but with much smaller mortgage too. No kids yet but planning them soon….so in a way I guess part of the conundrum is….is space or community the most important factor?? Any advice amazing. And sorry again if I sound like an [excerpted].

OP posts:

wowfudge · 02/08/2014 09:33

What's wrong with the area? If you can give some specifics that will help. As an early buyer in an up and coming area you could be quids in as things hot up if you do decide it's not for you.

Chumhum · 02/08/2014 09:37

Rent your house out and rent a place in the cooler area so you can try before you buy.

tiredwitless · 02/08/2014 09:48

Yes would need to know specifics. If or when you have kids and live in the area for a while, you will meet and get to know lots of people in you neighbourhood - community will develop over time. We are in a house that's not so great because of growing family busting out of it.. Loads of community though but constantly looking for a bigger house and none to be found unfortunately

Original poster

passingcloud · 02/08/2014 15:48

Thanks for responses! It's not so much that it's a BAD area, more that it's not got much going on, pretty suburban and a bit dreary. Turns out to be quite a lot of traffic including on our road. So living here feels quite isolated. On the upside we're lucky to be in a spacious and lovely house, but it hadn't felt like home to me since we moved in a year ago. If we moved, we'd go closer to city centre, in more buzzy/arty area, but in much smaller hpouse, with tiny garden. Though also means smaller mortgage. We are hoping to start family soon and I would plan go back to work f/t quite quickly as I am the main earner for us. So it's whether it's worth the pain/cost/hassle of moving. Choice between having kids in big lovely house in area I don't like (but that may change), while battling big mortgage...or smaller house where space would be squeezed but in more enjoyable area and with smaller mortgage which would make childcare etc a bit easier to fund and maybe life a bit easier. I just don't know what to do! Problem with renting is switching mortgage to BTL then tax on income etc means doesn't add up either. It feels so hard to predict what is most important with a new family before you have one...so any advice gratefully received!

OP posts:

Pipbin · 02/08/2014 16:53

Do I understand that the problem with the area is not drugs, crime and noisy parties, just that it's too suburban?

I do understand what you mean. I think you are better off staying put for a couple of years and seeing how it develops.

foxdongle · 02/08/2014 18:53

If you are planning kids then I would stay put in the big house.
Will you need a buzzy area with small DC?

I would never move to where other people are, they might move on! Have those people in the "cooler" area got DC?
Does that area with smaller houses suit them?
You might actually be where they would like to be.

Why does DH love the house?
Ask yourself if it's a case of the grass being greener?

LadyKooKoo · 02/08/2014 20:03

How soon are you planning dc? If in the next 18 months I would say stay put and reassess when they arrive as they will change your perspective on so much. We loved our inner city buzzy area when it was just the two of us but as soon as DD arrived we were itching to move on.

Original poster

passingcloud · 02/08/2014 20:32

Yes that's right Pipbin - not trouble like that, just v suburban.

The 'buzzier' area is actually full of young families who are living in the smaller houses, though foxdongle might be right, maybe they're all wishing they were in bigger places! I'm sure grass is greener syndrome might be part of the equation...

We are planning DC within the next 18 months...makes complete sense that your perspective changes after that which is why it's so good to hear views from people already there.

The other consideration is that for us to afford f/t childcare with the size of mortgage where we are, without a major lottery win or similar, we'd be really stretched - we'd have to stop paying into our pensions and switch to a repayment only mortgage just to get by. Moving to smaller place with smaller mortgage would make things easier and less scary in that regard. But of course the bigger place is a better investment in long run (though I don't really think of houses as investments, they're places to live).

My head hurts!!

OP posts:

LondonGirl83 · 03/08/2014 10:56

It depends on how small the other house would be. If lots of families get by in them, then I'd move. Stretched finances will make you miserable especially as you'll be trapped in your dull neighbourhood without money to go out.

Original poster

passingcloud · 03/08/2014 13:25

Smaller house is one bathroom, two double bedrooms and a boxroom, little yard out the back...so still pretty fortunate really. We'd need to stay for at least 5 years (can't move again) so we'd need to make it work with young family and all the stuff that goes with that. But it would mean we could afford childcare plus little luxuries like, you know, food...

OP posts:

Clarabum · 03/08/2014 13:42

Although your perspective regarding where you stay changes when you have kids, I'd personally go for the smaller house and see how you get on.
It sounds as though you have made your mind up about the area and if you are financially stretched for a house you don't love then I'd do what suits you.
Obviously you can budget, cut back on luxuries etc when you have kids but 2 beds and a box room seems a good amount of space for kids for the next 5 years at least. Even if you have 2 kids in the next 5 years, they can have a bedroom each with the youngest in the box room.
I moved to an area that's better for kids but which I can't stand (small seaside town) but the plus point is it's super cheap so our mortgage is a quarter of what it would be in the city. For that reason, I can thole it but if I was skint and unhappy with the area then I'd probably move.

MagnificentMaleficent · 03/08/2014 16:11

We were in the smaller house situation. So we bought a 3 bed semi, 2 doubles and a boxroom, garage and good size garden before we got married.

We are just moving to a much bigger 4 bed detached 8 years later with 3 DC. So we had 2 DD's, who are currently sharing, and a tiny DS who is in the box room. We could manage with the 2 DC although finding room for all their toys was a challenge. However, very close to an outstanding school, busy village type atmosphere but only 15mins away from a main town.

Now moving a couple of miles and will be on a very quiet road, better for secondaries, and with miles more room so that there will be enough space for 5 adults when the DC's grow up.

Depending on how many DC you want and in what ideal timeframe, I would give moving to the smaller house a lot of thought. Mainly due to your money situation though. Having a big house is no good if you can't afford to enjoy it.

lazysummer · 03/08/2014 19:16

Would it make financial sense to move again, once you have taken into account stamp duty and fees? Community is important, but your needs will change when you have a family.

LondonGirl83 · 03/08/2014 20:57

The small house is fine with 2 kids, particularly if your time horizon is 5 years for it to make financial sense. Two small DC's can share one of the doubles with the box room used for storage or as an office / spare room.

Do make sure though that once stamp duty is taken into account you are still better off financially as moving is expensive.

Life is too short to be unhappy when you can realistically do something about it.

Original poster

passingcloud · 04/08/2014 13:27

Really good advice, thanks all. After a weekend of mulling...I think we're going to try to make the move. There is a financial hit, but doing it would leave us living in an area I'd prefer, with less financial pressure day to day. Hoping it works out...

OP posts:

mipmop · 04/08/2014 13:43

With young children you'll appreciate being near a swing park, library, soft play centre, council leisure centre (for swimming, gymnastics etc), church halls (for toddler groups and baby/toddler activities, then later for scouts etc), also shops. Also it's nice to be walking distance from these things rather than always having to use the car. (Picking up some food from a local shop with children in a pushchair is much more convenient than having to get those children out of the car, particularly if they're asleep). If you can walk to a toddler group or swing park then you'll meet other parents who live nearby and your children will get to know those local children a bit more as they'll see each other more often. Also it's worth thinking about schools now...

I'd probably go for the smaller house.

Original poster

passingcloud · 04/08/2014 17:13

All good advice mimop, thanks. We thought current house was in catchment of good local primary, but have discovered it's actually not (catchment has shrunk). Small house is currently in catchment for a good primary. Of course that one might shrink as well...but as it stands at the moment, it's another positive to moving...

OP posts:

Flip