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Original poster

Missing our house

22 replies

Welshworrier · 14/12/2013 15:29

I know I sound ridiculous but I keep breaking down and crying. We moved out of our house yesterday and into temporary rented accommodation until we find a suitable house to buy. Our house had been on the market for over 2 years we received an excellent offer from a motivated seller.
We wanted to move closer to town to a more modern and smaller house in the hope of a small lifestyle change.
All our possessions have gone into storage and we have minimal personal items with us. I feel like I am grieving struggling to deal with what feels like the loss of our home. I was fine with the process and excited about moving on but broke down when the solicitor exchanged contracts,I have cried since Thursday!
I can see all the benefits and positives for Selling and it was originally my choice to sell. I have not heard of anyone who has behaved like this, my highly emotional reaction has even shocked my family.

OP posts:
Golddigger · 14/12/2013 15:44

Well, you are certainly going to feel unsettled, because you are not yet settled iyswim.
I have not done this myself the same way as you.
How long were you there?
Have you moved house often in your life?

Original poster
Welshworrier · 14/12/2013 16:06

Thanks for your reply. We were there for 12 years, this is only the fourth move and at 43 that's not often.

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Bowlersarm · 14/12/2013 16:11

It's a big change. Don't underestimate how strong your emotions can be. Be kind to yourself. You know it's what you ultimately want, so try and move forward positively. Perhaps once you've found the house you'd like to move into, you'll lose the sadness you are currently feeling and it'll be replaced by excitement.

SquinkiesRule · 14/12/2013 16:18

Huge change. I kept have little waves of nausea and nerves after ours sold and we moved out. Kept panicking that we had done the wrong thing. We were 20 years in the same house, long time in one spot.

specialsubject · 14/12/2013 16:25

moving from a big house to a small rental (because why would you rent oversized) is a bit sad, even if it is the nicest small rental in the world.

you also know you can't settle as you will be moving again. So get house viewing!

but it is really time to stop crying.

Original poster
Welshworrier · 14/12/2013 16:58

Thank you for taking the time to respond to me. Knowing you have listened and offered me some advice has really helped. Thank you.

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specialsubject · 14/12/2013 17:50

...and remember you are now a cash buyer with nothing to sell. The best kind!

MyBachisworsethanmybite · 14/12/2013 17:52

Oh I know that feeling! But in my case I had moved to my new permanent house.

It will fade and once you become more settled (find a house you are going to be in, start to make plans and then move) you will be far better.

Fret not, this too will pass.

Thesebootsweremadeforwalking · 14/12/2013 17:55

I left a house last year, when we moved here. I hated the old house, and the area it was in. I still got homesick for it, though. It took me about a week to pull myself together.

Original poster
Welshworrier · 14/12/2013 19:31

You all give such good sympathetic advice. I think there's a fair bit of anxiety present at the moment, making sure everyone is happy and safe and we find the right house for our future.

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InsertUsernameHere · 14/12/2013 19:54

Remember feeling quite similar. If you are moving one home to the next the excitement of the new place takes away the sadness for the old. When we moved into rented in between I really missed my old place (which was at its loveliest as we'd finished everything to sell). You are also a bit in limbo which means it is easy to look back instead of forward. You know you've done the right thing for your family. There will be more houses on in the new year and your in a fab position. Exciting times ahead, but missing the old place v normal.

Original poster
Welshworrier · 14/12/2013 20:06

Insertusernamehere, you're right, lost our lovely home and no excitement of a new home. Like you say we're in a good position for the new year, ready to offer and get something lovely. We put the tree and lights up this evening, it's feeling a bit cosier

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KittyOSullivanKrauss · 14/12/2013 20:11

Lovely comments from others, houses aren't just brick and mortar are they? Just wanted to add that we're currently renting in between sale and purchase. It made our position much, much stronger when making an offer on the house we're buying. A pain in the arse to move twice but being strong buyers has made it worth it. Hope you find something you want in the new year and that you have a lovely Xmas.

Original poster
Welshworrier · 14/12/2013 20:17

Kitty, lovely words and I'm crying again! I'm reminding myself the love hasn't been left in the walls, it's all around me now.

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Original poster
Welshworrier · 14/12/2013 20:18

Kitty, forgot to say, Happy Christmas!

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BrownSauceSandwich · 14/12/2013 20:56

Oh, bless you WW! A house is so much more than bricks and mortar... You invest so much time and love into making it what you want it, it's like a physical manifestation of your personality and your family relationships, of course you can grieve for it. I howled when it was time to walk away from my last house - it was my first "own" house, where DH and I first lived together, where we got married, where I graduated... I moved in there a child and I came out a grown-up.

I think your position is particularly hard, because you don't immediately have the distraction of setting up a new, permanent home. But you've made a well considered decision, and I'm sure it'll pay off. Like the others say, be kind to yourself for now, and when you find the perfect home, you'll be ready to put your heart and soul into it, without regrets.

Original poster
Welshworrier · 14/12/2013 21:15

Thanks Brownsauce, sensitive and honest words and I'm howling again!

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MumpireCallsTime · 16/12/2013 07:15

Totally understand that .
Moving house is right up there with divorce and bereavement and you have )for good reason) lengthened the process.
[Wine] to being strong buyers early 2014

Original poster
Welshworrier · 16/12/2013 15:54

One positive thing about my reaction to moving, I will offer all my sympathy to anyone who moves, I now realise why it's in the to 3 of stressful life events. Hopefully we'll find a permanent new home in the new year and I will start to get excited about choosing colours and curtains etc. and this awful experience will be a distant memory. I need to remember the people I love are safe and all around me.

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Golddigger · 16/12/2013 15:58

True. Your current predicament should only be temporary.

LastOneDancing · 16/12/2013 16:13

Ah OP.
I felt so homesick for my old house when I moved in with now DH. It was the most rickety, tiny house ever but it was mine. I felt safe & happy there & I'd worked hard to buy my kitchen and bathroom... I was so proud if my pretty little home. It broke my heart to go into a bigger, but soulless magnolia rented property!

But finally, we have a home of our own together which we are rapidly filling with happy memories. The new house is definately 'home' now & I think about my old place with much fondness, but as a part if my past.

Dry those sad tears and empty another packing box... Wink

Original poster
Welshworrier · 16/12/2013 16:44

Thank you for taking the time to respond. I'm looking forward to looking back with fond memories.

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