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Original poster

Distance from schools....

11 replies

AllBoxedUp · 22/06/2013 14:56

We are looking to buy and are trying to choke between 2 locations. We currently live in a village north of the small city I work in. If we stay here then DS will eventually go to Secondary School in a village about 8 miles away with no decent public transport between there or back. This school is fine and it will be 8 years till then anyway.

DH has a job which is south of the city and we are considering moving closer to that instead. That would mean moving to a small town which has an excellent secondary that DS could easily walk or cycle to.

How important do you think this is? If we are going to move I would like to go now. I am imaging if we stay where we are I will spend DS's teenage tears driving back and forth to the village where his school is. I do like our village though and the small town is a bit of an unknown to us. We've only been here 3 years though and we are TTC so if we do move I would hopefully meet other mums and make friends while on maternity leave. I also work 4 days so it does make sense for us to be nearer DH's work and I am more open to changing jobs than he is. Thanks for reading.

OP posts:

lalalonglegs · 22/06/2013 15:00

I think schools are really important but it's difficult to predict how they will be performing in 8 years' time.

Original poster

AllBoxedUp · 22/06/2013 15:14

Thanks for the reply. I know that schools can change completely in 8 years so am trying not to let that influence us too much. I am interested to know how much of a pain in the bum it is if you have to drive your child to football/dancing/swimming/music every other evening or just if half their friends live a drive away.

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FishfingersAreOK · 22/06/2013 17:02

You would not just have to drive him too/from school....but every time he wanted to hang out with his friends/go to sports practice/if your 2 DCs have difference after school activities on.

Or have to do what my PIL had to do for DH - say if you cannot get there yourself you cannot go (to be fair they only had one car that FIL used for work and there were 6 children so can understand it. DH got very used to long bike journeys).

It is worth thinking about. But check out the town. Get a feel for it. Would you be happy living there? Or does the village you are in hold enough appeal to make all the journeys worth it? My DCs were going to a primary 12 miles away. A bit longer I know - but god I grew to hate that drive. And I only did it for a year.

lalalonglegs · 22/06/2013 22:24

Total pain in the arse. It is worth moving to avoid driivng everywhere.

Original poster

AllBoxedUp · 23/06/2013 09:06

I'm starting to feel that way but we viewed a really nice house in our village yesterday.....very confused! Thanks for the replies.

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flow4 · 23/06/2013 10:05

It depends on where the other kids live. If they mostly live near the school 8 miles away, then that would be a real pita. But if enough of them live in the village near you and also travel 8 miles to school, it could be ok.

I have a similar situation with my two boys, although their school is 5-6 miles away. It is working well with DS2; but wasn't so good with DS1, because the 'local lads' his age got into all sorts of trouble, and the village community meant it was very difficult not to be part of it...

The other factor is public transport. If you're very rural, it will be more of a pain. Our public transport is pretty good, and my boys have become quite independent, and both travel by themselves to see friends in other villages.

Original poster

AllBoxedUp · 23/06/2013 10:13

Our "village" has a population of about 3000 and is set to grow so hopefully he should have friends here. It is a pretty nice place as well. The small town we could move to is fine but we could probably only afford a former council house there in an area that seems fine but is probably less desirable. Transport is fine into the city in both places but between villages is pretty rubbish.

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Original poster

AllBoxedUp · 23/06/2013 10:14

And by rubbish I mean non-existent.

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flow4 · 23/06/2013 10:59

I'm not sure you can predict what will happen in 8 years; you'll probably just have to take a gamble...

Do bear in mind though, that even rural idylls have dark under-bellies, and some boundary-pushing teenagers (including my DS1) seem particularly drawn... Our village is lovely, and I would never have imagined the things that go on here - drugs and fencing stolen goods and murder included - that my DS1 has encountered. I guess it all happens in a town/city too, and probably more often; but in a village you know people... There are only about 15 boys in each school year, so they are forced into each others' company a bit even if they have nothing much in common; and if a few of them get into bad situations and/or habits, it affects the wider group. We're moving closer to town where (I hope) simple arithmetic will mean my boys will meet more people and be more likely to find and choose good friends, rather than hanging out with just those few who happen to be living nearby...

meditrina · 23/06/2013 11:10

If it is 8 miles, and if it's the school that all his primary friends go to, then they will all be on a school bus (assuming that it is a pack of them, not just one or two in a taxi and that there is no suitably timed public bus for which they might be given passes). And friendships on a school bus and the fine tradition of doing homework on the bus will add to, not harm, his school experience.

Yes, you might have to pick up if they choose an after school club or a town-based activity. But the latter might occur anyhow, as will ferrying to friends in rural areas (for even if you move to another village, the pupils who might become his friends may live miles outside it).

Original poster

AllBoxedUp · 23/06/2013 13:47

Lot's to think about! I was actually a "bus kid" at school in a very rural area and have some fond and not so fond memories of the one hour coach trip to school each day. It also means I don't have romantic notions of small communities (though we didn't have any murders in our village - though that might just be luck - can think of a few attempted murder cases). Our village was so small that, while DH who is from a large city was going to pubs regularly at 16, there was nowhere we could go as the staff and locals would know you were underage. I'm not sure if this was actually a good thing as it just meant people would find someone to buy a bottle of vodka and everyone would get wasted in the park instead with probably less restraint and control.

Also, while our current village is very nice it's also the kind of place where I know several of the children at playgroups are down for places at private schools already. This isn't really something we'd choose (and can't afford to anyway!) so I do wonder how it will affect the dynamic of the village.

I don't think there's a right answer - we just have to make a decision (and 8 years is a long time - we could be anywhere by then).

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