One month into a renovation - come hold my hand?

[lamandler]

I posted here a few months ago about an imminent renovation of a Vict terrace in London. Most people said things like "it's hell", "you'll barely survive", etc etc. At the time I thought (as I did pre-children about child rearing) really, what's the fuss? it won't be that bad.

Well, it is - and we aren't even living in the house!

Planning permissions being refused, an architectural technician who has been horrendous to work with, builders getting miffed over crap plans and pedantic council. And there are three months to go.

I hoped that some kind experienced souls here could impart words of wisdom on how to handle the daily stresses while trying to work, look after 2 small DC, not kill DH.....

And breathe

We moved in with my parents a few years ago whilst renovating. It was hard, very hard. I know it seems like it will never end, but it will, and I promise once you are in you will forget the pain! It probably seems like that point is a long way off, and it may be but don't forget it! Nothing can't be over come! Good luck!

We had a nightmare extension project - crap builders, failed building regs, no heating for 3 months thru the winter with a 9 mo baby ...

Honestly it will be worth it and you will forget the angst in time. Can the technician redo the plans adequately to get planning permission, or do you need outside help?

Try to find little things that make you happy and help you relax, even in a building site. Try to switch off from the build at times, have designated times to talk about it with your DH rather than letting it dominate 24/7. Getting away definitely helped too - we borrowed a cottage for a week midway thru the build at a stage where the builders didn't need so much input. It got us away and helped us relax.

Thanks that does help. We are project managing it (in the loosest sense of the word) and its increasingly apparent we haven't a clue what we are doing! Ceiling height in loft lower than we expected, corners cut on rushed planning permission applications which are not best use of design. Just feel like we are making an arse of our entire life savings

It's worth getting it right. Can you pause, get the plans right and then progress?

Think we will sack him and get someone else on board to look over things. Has anyone ever changes plans after getting permission? Does it take same length of time again?

A good architect can tell you which changes are easy to make and which require a full review. Probably so can your planning officer - we found that they were really helpful. We had to edit a couple of things and they were unimportant so we just paid a small amount, got on with them, and permission came through ages later.

Do you know what your council will allow? Starting with that is a good position, and a good architect should know too.

It is worth it. We have still a few snaggy bits to finish and some end of project bits to do - but we are now in - and it is the space we want that suits our lifestyle. It is worth it. And you will forget the hard bits once you are in ( we were in a static in the front garden for 8 months and I longed for frozen peas (no freezer) space in the bedroom (was only 4 inches either side of our bed) and living somewhere that didn't smell like a 14 year old static previously owned by dog-mad mingers family.

5 weeks on and apart from this thread i have almost forgotten about all the crap bits.

It is worth it. though fucking expensive

I'd suggesting pausing and getting it right now - there are a few little things that the builder cut corners on and we accepted just because we wanted to finish. Three years on we still regret not getting it right and at some point we will have to pay lots to redo the errors.