uPVC - can it be --wiped from the earth-- painted?

[MandaHugNKiss]

Completely renovating our first house purchase, so lots and lots to do/decide and pay for, urgh .

Whilst the interior is our main concern for now, we also would like to tart up improve the front. Painting the house is one thing (that will be done) but... the windows are upvc. And dark brown 'we're upvc pretending to be wood' upvc. It somehow manages to be more offensive to mine eyes than white upvc which at least has the good honour to be what it is, iyswim.

So! Can it be, somehow, painted/sprayed? The bottom line is we certainly can't afford to replace all the windows yet (and they're in good nick, actually, anyway) but I really dislike the dark brown.

I suspect I'm going to get a chorus of 'no!'s as a quick consultation with Google Master Builder (a close relation of Dr. Google) didn't yield much of any hope but it's worth a try, I suppose

You can usually paint rigid plastics such as meter-cabinets and waste-pipes with a single flowing coat of non-drip gloss, with no undercoat. A soft brush of a size that you can handle easily and neatly. Do not brush it thin. Clean the substrate well, finishing with green nylon scourer and a drop of white spirit. I have only used oil-based gloss, not water paint.

Satisfy yourself that the wood-effect coating is adhering firmly.

Practice on unimportant windows at the back. Clean off any drips at once.

Thanks, PJ - when I say 'dark brown pretending to be wood' I mean, really pretending well - at a glance, it looks like the real deal, even when you touch it, there's still an element of 'is it or isn't it?'. It's grainy.

a quick google to find something like it - it's the very dark brown one pictured last (click it for close up)

The door/frame are the same too... although the porch is real wood I know as the bottom right corner was rotted and we've repaired that already

Maybe I should try and accept it's not going to be possible and think of a house colour that will work with it?