Buying the least worst option - anyone got positive stories to share with me?

[Thatsnotmypenguin]

We've been looking for a house for a few months, and have arrived at a shortlist of three. Tonight we are supposed to be choosing one and drafting up an offer tomorrow, ready for Monday morning. Trouble is, I'm not really in love with any of them, and none is in my first-choice location (where we can't find anything we can afford on sale at the moment which isn't a hovel).

We have to move - DS needs a school application to be in by mid-January, and I'd rather not leave it any later than we already have - and DH says he would be happy with any of them, so it looks like I'll be sealing my own fate here.

Does anyone have a really positive, comforting story about buying a house you weren't sure of, which turned out to be your wonderful family home? I could do with a bit of moral support here.

Well erm sort of.

Our home was the one dh wanted out of the 3 beds we could afford at the time.

Sure I would love to be able to afford to move but we can't but 10 years on it's home, my 3 youngest came home from the hospital to here so full of lots of happy memories.

Thanks Random - I guess I might actually be OK with it in the long run, because of the memories thing - but in the short term, how on earth do you hold your nerve between offer and completion?

Can't you just rent? You don't have to buy you know. Seems a rash thing to do when you'll likely be moving again soon as you don't love the place. Seems a bit costly.

It's not like prices are going up, so holding out will probably mean you get the house you really want at a bargain price.

Don't do it. Rent somewhere in the school area you want. Trust me, I did this and we ending up pulling out close to exchange. Our sellers quickly found new buyers but man did I feel like a shit.

Well I was heavily pregnant, I was past caring just wanted it done and to be moved in!

TBH we bought because at the time it was much cheaper than renting and it was 10.5 years ago so house prices had been raising again after several years of being at a plateau - the market is different now in most places.

I can understand how you felt, as being pregnant does make you s bit desperate to have a 'home'. But as I said to OP, the housing market isn't one where people quickly pile in for fear of rising prices. Solicitors fees/estate agent fees etc. will mean renting will definitely be cheaper than buying.

I'd rent, but DH is desperate to get back to owning (we're renting now, our onward purchase fell through). I really want to feel settled again too, but the idea of wanting to move again does bother me.

What are your finances likely to look like in a couple of years' time? Is there reason to think that your DH or you will be earning more, or could you rent somewhere where you had a proper chance to save?

I think if your financial position is likely to improve quickly, and make that nice area affordable, then you should seriously think about renting for a bit because buying costs are so high. If not, and realistically you feel like you could never afford the 'ideal' that'd be different.

Good point crazy, we have actually talked a bit this week about holding our breath hard and upping our budget to get in the best area. Maybe we need to look into that more seriously.

I feel like such an ungrateful cow. The 3 on the table are all 4 beds in better areas than where we are now, by miles. They're just not speaking to me, and I am seriously wondering if IABU about it all.

Would you be better off getting a really nice 3 bed that you love in the area you want, you wouldn't suddenly out grow it?

Undoubtedly, but there isn't one for sale right now.

I contacted the EA of one of the houses this week to ask about the onward chain. She said the vendors would probably rent as they hadn't found what they were looking for yet. Turns out, according to EA, we're not alone. The market here is so flat, with nothing selling but nothing new either, that we've looked at houses we just wouldn't have considered if there was anything else, IYSWIM.

I don't think you should buy a house if you can't feel positive about it. On the other hand, I'm always slightly bemused by the idea of holding out for your perfect family home - perhaps because I live in London and a perfect family home in a nice location is an impossible dream.

My home is far from being my dream home. It's on a busy road, It's been badly modernised. The front door opens straight into the living room. The rooms are small with low ceilings. I bought it because it was in the right location and had enough rooms for my dp (who works from home) to have a study. It was very cheap for the area (which isn't saying much, admittedly - it was still SW London silly money) because it is so ugly, especially from the outside. Our first two visitors - my mum and my FIL - both said some variant of: "I hate it. Sell it."

I'll never love it but I've grown fond of it. Unlike its classier Victorian neighbours, it is light and bright. Its picture windows look out over a large green at the front, with copper beeches nested by green parakeets. At the back, there is a large garden with lots of trees. Our neighbours are lovely and the neighbourhood is very child-friendly. Most of all, I've really enjoyed working out how to improve its looks and help it make the best of itself - after all, you're not going to get a lot of satisfaction through doing a makeover on Angelina Jolie, are you?

So I don't think you have to buy your dream home. But I do think you have to understand the compromises you are prepared to make, and to feel positive about them. I'm proud of how I've helped along my bugly little house, and I am certain that we made the right choice in buying it.

Your post was screaming "Rent!" at me all the way through. Unless you're in one of the London/SE hotspots (which are behaving bizarrely) most of the country house prices are falling. I can only see them falling for years to come.

If you read any of the finance papers (FT/Wall St J/ etc) they all say the same thing - the UK housing market is fooked. With that in mind you have to assume that if you buy now it could be (very) many years before you'll be able to sell (for an acceptable amount). I'd only do that if I was sure about the house (unless they're much better than you can rent in your area).

We had a house that was our least worst option once. We lived there for 7 years, in which time I had DD, both DCs started school and we had many happy times but it was never a "forever" house.

We moved from there to one I loved at first sight but we had to move out fairly soon after as DH changed job. The one we are in now we liked but didn't love when we bought it but it has gradually become home and it would take an awful lot to tempt me out of it now.

I agree with RCheshire. Prices have only remained stable-ish due to ultra low interest rates and the first time buyer stamp duty incentive, and prices in a few prime areas masking the extent of any falls. Now these are being removed, I would say the prognosis for prices is generally not good.

Even London, which is defying gravity, is being heavily supported by foreign investment due to the economic crisis, exchange rates and of course the olympic effect. How many of these are sustainable?

Also, if you are under any sort of time pressure, you will not get the best deal. So if you have the option to remain in rented, I would take it for the next couple of years - you have very little to lose and could potentially see your money going a lot further when you do come to buy.

Thanks all, you have reassured me that I'm not crazy here! I will talk to DH tonight and see if we can find a compromise here.

rc/alabama- what do you think of the govt's new proposals to give banks money to give out mortgages (presumably to prop-up the housing market)?

I'm a long way from London, but prices do not seem to be dropping, though nothing is selling as I'm guessing vendors refuse to take lower offers

If houses were revalued to a realistic level (i.e. what would get people buying again in any volume) and the banks started to repossess those who cannot afford their mortgages, then the banks would have to realise vast losses which currently are being held at bay.

The government/BoE is desperate to avoid the banks failing so is doing it's best to stop that - which means trying to prop up the property market through low interest rates, QE and cheap loans to banks.

It's ticking bomb though. People in their 20s in most parts of the country (& those in school uni now who will follow them) simply cannot afford to buy houses. Most activity is from those who have made money in property over the silly last ten years trading amongst themselves.

If people cannot afford to buy/are unwilling to pay current prices then you have a stalemate (which is where we are) which will end gradually as housing is devalued.

The housing market is full of people whose houses have been for sale for 6, 12, 18 or 24 months and aren't significantly dropping their asking prices. For some it's because they simply can't afford to (i.e. negative equity); for others it is that they expect prices/activity to return to 'normal', without realising that the last 10 years has been incredibly abnormal.

Interest rates can only go up, unemployment is due to go up, people are starting work with more and more student debt, wages are stagnant, other costs are going up (i.e. we still have non-wage inflation), so logically, will the future buyers of houses have more, or less money than those a few years ago? And following on from that, will houses have to be more expensive, or cheaper, to sell.

Interesting post R Cheshire. My only counter thought is the basic supply problem - in the London hotspot I'm looking in at least - houses are largely held by older people with little or no mortgage, and when sellers can't get the prices that they want for them, they take them off the market and rent them out for loads, cos there aren't enough houses and people who work in London therefore have to rent to live here....then they eventually get annoyed with that then have to cough up for purchase! Only honest sale opportunities around are probates...and because of this funny rent/sale market the sale prices weren't even affected by the 2007 dip.

Who'd be young? (ish, in my case)

However, I totally agree that given all the uncertainty, why tie yourself to something you don't like? You haven't got a crystal ball so that house you want to buy needs to feel like a home.

This is particularly true if you can rent at a cost that allows you to save - again very tough in some areas.

Odmedod, the jury is still out on that one - and lets face it, £375 billion of quantitative easing hasn't exactly ignited the housing market. Many commentators seem to think it won't do anything for rates on new mortgages, rather will stop SVRs being raised any more. Only time will tell I suppose but either way, if there was a chance for cheaper lending in the future, that's another reason to hold off buying.

Re prices, I would suggest looking at sold prices on the land registry - it often tells a different story. Where I live there are plenty of homes on at 2007+ asking, but according to the land reg, actual sold prices are back at late 2004 levels.

So tough - I went back to one of the houses this evening to see if I could muster up any enthusiasm for it - it might be OK I guess. The trouble is, the price would have to come down a lot - at least 15% - before we could afford to buy it and bring it up to a decent standard (e.g. put an actual bath in the bathroom, replace the threadbare carpets and the misted windows - I'm really not being fussy here!).

DH has agreed that, if we don't have an offer in on something by the end of the month, we will move to a rental in our first choice area thankfully.

Though what he'll say if it's a 2-bed flat, I really don't know!

When I bought our house, I just chose the only one available which ticked all boxes - I was not in love with it. I hated it later as it drained my wallet madly in first years, and now after 3 years I am OK with it - I realise it is good house which would tick the boxes for many people. I hoping it will be easy to sell when the time comes, and that's another "tick".