Is moving to a new village with a toddler a good idea?

[missclairep]

We would like to move house, we have a 19 month old daughter and one on the way and live in a two bed with not much storage. We have found a three bed with loads of storage and loads of room inside and out. Only trouble is it has oil central heating and is 15 drive for oh to get to work, we currently live 5 min from his work, 4 doors down from his mum and over the road from his sister. He has never liked living in the same village as his lot and he doesn't like them interfering but our daughter has got used to them being there, they don't visit us but i try to make a point of going round once a week for an hour or so.

The new house if 15 min drive away and had good amenities, shcool with a nursery, doctors, shop, playgroup and is on a bus route. we have to walk a hour to get to the shop and back from here (i don't drive) or go into town on the bus (20 min and costs £4) the new house is also closer to my parents and really is half way between the two families, my oh doesn't care if he sees his mam again as they don't get on.

Is moving to a new village where niether of us knows anyone with a toddler a good idea?

It's 15 minutes away, not the Outer Hebrides!

Fab idea. You can go to toddlers and playgroup and meet loads of other mums and tots. It is much harder to meet people once the children have started school.

I think when you've got toddlers or children just starting primary school is the perfect time to move. By far the easiest time of your life to meet people. 15 minutes really isn't far so you can still see all your old friends and dh family.

no, I did it! was so hard to get out and do the things I'ld normally do to make friends, left our babysitters behind so couldn't do evening classes, and couldn't work because the childcare was so expensive

it was SOOOOO LONELY! because of the above reasons I was restricted to trying to socialise in toddler oriented places ONLY, and because it was smaller there were less playgroups to choose from (actually each playgroup had the same people going round them all), and because it was less diverse and other people were well established there I found them far less friendly than urban playgroups - everyone knew each other since antenatal and the groups were pretty fixed

I'm pretty outgoing, lived in a few cities and made friends EVERYWHERE ELSE i've lived, this was the only place I've ever lived that I didn't make one new friend in. Tried all the usual: meet-a-mum boards, striking up converstations at the bus stop, persevering with the playgroups.. gave up in the end and cut our losses

I LOVED moving around previously when I was child free, was always a nice push/opportunity to meet new people, but with the village most of my friend making tools were taken away from me:

• getting involved in adult activities/classes/volunteering etc due to no babysitter
• CHOICE of playgroups, being able to shop around for a friendly group - although there were a few different play groups they were all attended by the same people

worst time ever to move IMO

oh hang on, you're talking about moving 15 mins away - that's the SAME PLACE????

It sounds perfect, 15 mins is nothing!

Its the perfect time to move! Get out & find out who people are!

Because where we are is rural not city, 15 min away is a completely differnt place not even in the same council area. There is no direct transport between the two places, as i don't drive its not as easy get about.

I think if you don't drive and don't plan to drive in the near future you need to plan this move around what will make you life easier to get around (now and in the future). Think about distance from schools and pre-schools, shops, public transport, friends etc. Also, if you want to work in the future how easy would that be to get children to childcare or school then get to work and then pick them up.

Once your children are not in a buggy it gets a lot harder to get them around without a car as they are not always cooperative!!! I didn't drive when mine were young and there was no way I would have coped with an hour walk to the nearest shop!

Village would be fine if you drove. If not I would stick to a town where you can access most things on foot. Buses are not particularly easy with 2 young children and are not usually that reliable!!

It sounds as if you are going to have to move at some point because you need more space so bite the bullet and do it now. I think that making new friends is best done when the dc are small as there are usually activities you can join in. It won't be so easy when your dc goes to school because most of the activities are usually toddler-centric.

Are you talking about buying a new house or renting. If you don't like it you can always move back, nothing's irreversable. I would give it a go. you can't live in your inlaws pockets for ever and maybe they should be making the effort to see you as well.

Maybe learning to drive shoulod be part of your long term plan as you live in a rural area. As your dc grows up and wants to go places you will need to be more mobile