Beyond fed up with house selling. Baby due in 3 months.

[mrshotrod]

There are similar angsty moans in this forum, I am feeling your pain. I needed to air mine. Might help me sleep!
We first sold our house in August. It's old ,the survey showed up the usual, damp, old timbers in cellar bla bla. the lady totally got scared, didn't even talk let alone negotiate, and pulled out. Since then our lovely little house has been tarnished with the 'Why did the sale fall through'.
We had two more offers made (lower, but bearable) and then they too pulled out cos of 'the damp'.
IT IS SUCH A BLOODY BIG CON. I could strangle The surveyors for having to cover their backs to the enth degree, and Tmberwise!! Well, the less said about them the better. Our EA's weren't much help in negotiating for us either. £650 to them already for very little.
By this time, we've 'bought' a place, paid for our survey, (another £700) chain set up and now I am pregnant with number two.
Three 'contractors' (in own best interests to find a problem) have looked at the damp. It is clear to anyone with eyes and a brain what has caused it, but all it does is make the paint bubble a teeny bit, after 3 years, there are no timbers to rot. Common sense goes out of the window. We have had it tanked all down stairs through desperation. (One wall that Timberwise said was damp was bone dry when we stripped it back. BE WARNED!!)
No mean feet moving in with your in laws for two weeks with a toddler.
We've sold again now, £8K less than first sale nearly £2k spent on tanking re plaster and us having to paint it all, and hey, they want Timberwise to come round and look at the damp issue. My husband seemed shocked, I wasn't. They will always find damp. Show me a house without 'damp' and I'll eat my pants. Never let this put you off a sale without really reading up on it. It always has a cause and it is most often very fixable.
Have seen a house we like, but Hubby sensibly won't put any offers in till we are really sold. Likely to move into rented if we actually do, with a toddler, then have a baby, then move again...???? New house, baby, potty train toddler, new nursery, another house move....I'm not sure how I'm going to cope, or how to best help my toddler with all these major changes.
Husband says, 'don't worry'. Very hard when all you want to do is nest. Am hating this so much. I didn't even want to move in the first place, well not yet anyway. We are not like those London couples on Location Location, and I don't know where we will keep finding these little splurges of money that just seem to keep flying out of our bank account and gaining us bugger all.
Trying so hard to count my blessings, of which I have many, but every time the agents call, my heart just plummets. I just want to know where we'll be living when this baby comes. I can't mentally live in many more houses. I need to know which one will be our home.
I may cry now, or find some nutella......

Oh god, full sympathy.

You are right about Timberwise. They basically provide a 'report' of work they'd like to carry out.

I have moved three times ins ix months and am about to move again for the last time. Horrendous but doable> And it will be great to be cash buyers?

I feel your pain... We just had an offer accepted on a place we saw THREE bloody months ago when it first came on the market. Despite being obviously overpriced and us being the highest offer, they were holding out for £5K more! In the end, it took us an ultimatum before they agreed to sell. And we've been under offer for a few weeks (for a lot less than we expected, ouch!) after being on the market since August and countless viewings and 1 'fake' offer... Sigh

Try to hold on to the hope that you are now 'under offer' again, that is no mean feat!!!!!!!! And honestly, I think you can put an offer in the house you like, surely you are not going to wait till you have exchanged and nowhere to move to before you make the offer? There is no way I was going into rental either with two young toddlers. F* no! I would rather eat slimy toads and crusty toenails...

If all else fails, nutella always helps! While 'negotiations' were underway last week, I ate almost the whole jar... Good luck! Let us know how you get on...

It's tough, but buyers will be picky if they can afford to be. The word "damp" is enough to make many people run screaming.

You'll get there, don't worry.....

When we bought our first house we had a full survey as it was ancient and we thought we should. It picked up the usual stuff like damp, which we decided could be (and was) sorted by new heating. It didn't pick up the fact that the electrics were not just old but actively dangerous and that the whole lot needed re-wiring.

The electricity board, who came round to talk to us about re-wiring condemned the electrics and turned us off.

The surveyor denied that any of this was his responsibility, nothing to do with me guv, and flatly refused to refund some of the survey costs or pay towards the new electrics.

We were possibly a bit naive (only mid 20's and first house purchase) but even so felt well and truly ripped off. We won in the end with the help of the electricity people and did get some money and an admission of fault, but I'm so wary of surveys now.

We didn't have one on this house, just got a builder round to have a good look at it which was much better - he didn't find any problems.

If you believed everything in a survey no-one would ever buy a house....

I moved three times between my son being 4 months and 13 months and we also had a toddler. I moved wice las year with a toddler and a 4yo and a 6yo - it is a pain but it is doable and none of my children minded in the least, they saw it as a big adventure so don't worry about any psychological scarring.

There is an art to reading a surveyor's report and some people are far more nervous than others - hope you have a good robust buyer this time. Good luck.

I want a whinge too. I'm so fed up! We're trying to sell a one bed, but living with my DM in the meantime as we have a baby and I work from home (so one bed totally unsuitable). Have been on the market since Nov last year and loads of viewings, but no offers. All positive feedback but nobody is biting. We redecorated, dressed it and everything before putting on the market, having racked our brains we can't think of anything else we can do (have dropped the price twice, it's now the cheapest 1 bed that doesn't need doing up ie. The cheaper ones are old persons houses and have disgusting olive green kitchen units, or other horrors). Have swapped agents too.

Think it's just a case of sitting it out but I'm slowly going mad living at my DMs. Thinking of looking to rent in the meantime but paying rent and mortgage on the place we're selling would be a real struggle. However, living here is really starting to take it's toll. Feeling depressed!

I am on buyer no.3 house purchase no.3 and finally moving next week after 6 months and the most stress I have been under in my life. There is light at the end of the tunnel. I have two small children and it is a nightmare getting house ready/viewing houses to buy. I could kill several estate agents etc... I will not be moving again for at least 20 years!

I would second not taking much notice of a survey - we do get one, but also a roofer, drains survey, general builder looks round the property - only need to give them £75/100 each to look round, sometimes they do it for nothing.

@ OP - We have a clause in our contract that says EA doesn't get paid until the contracts are exchanged and sale is final. I assumed this was standard - what was the £650 paid for?

And I agree about the frustration of selling a house! We had 16 viewings over 9 months, nothing but positive feedback which was even more annoying. I wish people would just be honest and say 'I hate it because of XYZ', because then at least you know what to fix. Sale going through now, fingers crossed. I'm nervous about the survey even though the house is in reasonable order, feel like I'm having to sit an exam. :(

Oh wow, thank you, so many of us in the same boat. It does help when you hear other stories. (Is that mean!?)
I know I don't ever want to move again after this, so really want to get it right.
Makes me feel better hearing others have moved toddlers several times, I'm sure he'll cope as long as we're all together. It would help if my dad didn't feel the need to lecture me on how disruptive it ill be...'Yes, I know, it's not what we had planned!!!' Aghhhh.
Our agents charged that stupid amount for all the 'work' they did upfront, ad in paper (Total waste of time, should have said no) brochure, web site etc. Then they want more when they do sell it. I think it's a northern thing.
Wow Frostyfingers, what a battle. Fancy being cut off. I too feel like we were naive when we bought this much beloved house, but we loved it, we didn't care what it needed doing, and living with it's supposed problems turned out not to be a problem at all, until now.
Lemondifficult - I cannot imagine moving three times in 6 months. Hope you are very happy and settled in your final home.
MushroomandOlives - Poor you. that sounds very over crowded. You have to just hope it picks up in the spring. Is there much feed back why viewers aren't making offers? Good luck.

I was so sick last night, I thought it was nerves about our buyer coming for her 2nd viewing. I'd felt ill all day. She seems understanding about the survey and wants to move on still. Hubby feels we could now make offer on other house, I hardly dare hope it will work out. Buyers buyers wants it all done by end of April, and husband has said we'll move out. I don't think 6 weeks is anywhere near enough for if we got new house and they also vacated, so baby due end of June might be brought home to in laws.....OMG and there's another story! I am laughing, it will surely work out for all of us eventually, but this stress is just evil.

I feel your pain but there will be light at the end of the tunnel...honestly.

We are finally completing and moving this Friday - after being on the market for 13 months!! . Oh and I'm 38 weeks pregnant on Saturday!

Luckily the house we first saw back in Feb last year didn't sell either and we managed to get it - how lucky was that!?!?

We paid £1250 for a full survey on the house we've bought (couldn't get the cheap one as the company refused due to age of property) and it came back with about 45 pages!! After reading it through, it was clear that most of it could be written without even seeing the place!. It said there was evidence of previous/historic damp and woodworm, but also no evidence that it was still there or causing any damage.

DH panicked when he read the report and it took me ages to calm him down - including my calling the surveyor twice and actually asking him 'Would you buy it' - only for him to say that it was fine and there was nothing he didn't expect to find in a property of that age, nothing major at all. Yet reading his report you'd be forgiven for thinking the place was on it's last legs!!

I think the more you pay for the report, the more they write. Irrespective of what it actually means mint terms of work needed! I'm glad I'm not the panicking type 'cos I really think DH might have backed off and I wouldn't be moving into our lovely new house in 2 days......well, hopefully! (Don't totally believe it yet, and won't until the keys are in my hand...!)

Have you tried hypnotherapy for the birth - I got some CDs and have found the relaxation bits are SO useful in calming me down when I actually start to think about what is going to happen in the next couple of days with the move, packing, me not being able to walk much, 2 other DCs...........oh, that and totalk denial!

Ha ha ha ha. Our agents have just rung.... our buyers buyers, have just pulled out!
They were the bottom of the chain and have for the last month been pushing for it all to move by end of April.
I am laughing rather than cry as I didn't actually see this one coming.

The whole system of having the survey done after you offer makes chains break all over the place, It is sooooo screwed up. Surveyors making money hand over fist to survey the same property over and over and lose yet more sales. I know I don't want my lovely little house being slagged off for a third time. Our poor buyer, I feel her pain now. So, do we stick with her and let her go through all the viewings hassle? I'd rather do that than put our back on the market. or is it a sign that moving was never a good idea....! Glad we didn't put that offer in ourselves now.

Oh dear the same did happen to us. I would give your buyer a week or two at most to come up with another buyer. If I really wanted to move I would put my house on the market as your buyer is no longer able to proceed. You never know there could be a cash buyer out there for your house or somebody in rental and that would save you alot of hassle. However, you may have to take more of a price reduction plus get your house tidy being pregnant with a toddler.

Chin up, I thought I would never move either and it has worked, just.

mrshotrod Oh, I am so sorry to hear that! Did they give any reason those little sods?

DH and I just went to see our mortgage adviser and I feel ill at the thought of borrowing that much money! So I went out and bought myself a new clock. Stress makes people do funny things...

He he. Buying a new clock when faced with the reality of enormous debts and bills is probably the sort of thing I'd do too. I have seen a duvet cover I rather like.....
So hard to decide if we go back on market and look for that oh so atractive cash buyer (or end up with loads more viewings stress, surveys bla bla) or if we let our buyer go through it instead, and hope she can sell. Personally I'd like to give her two months to find buyer and get sorted so I can just concentrate on having this baby.
If only we had a crystal ball. So hard to know what is best thing to do.
I know for one thing I don't want a third surveyor making money by verbally tearing our house to shreds. Surveyors have a lot to answer for. I know it's important to have one, but do they have to be so scary to read. At the end they always say it's worth buying but by then the buyer is petrified.

mrshotrod If your buyer is still keen, give her a bit of time... We took our buyer even though his offer was low and we took a bit of a hit (bought at peak), he's a retiring vicar, the church is buying the house for him as part of his pension so it's effectively a cash buyer. At the moment, everything is going smoothly and we are set to exchange at the end of the month with a delayed completion (he doesn't retire till September so won't need the house till then) so it gives us some time to complete on the other purchase.