How do you go about picking the right school

[NoushieMin]

This may sounds like a silly question, but we know nothing about the private school world, we have no friends with children in private school, but we have made the decision that we will most likely be applying to private schools for our son due to there not being a good state school option in our area.

There are a lot of private schools in our county, so my question is how do you go about narrowing down the list, even just to go and visit, we can't realistically go and visit 10 schools, so we need to get the list down to 5 or 6.

What should I be looking at when I am researching each school, distance from home, class sizes, extra curricular activities, exam results??? Are there any websites or anything that collate some of this information?

One thing I do know is that despite there being a lot of private schools in our area (Surrey), the good ones are very competitive to get into. So I guess we should be factoring in how likely it is that he would even get into the school, there doesn't seem much point applying for a school that he has no chance on getting into without years of tutoring and coaching 🤪
I mean how do you even know if they stand a chance of passing the entrance exam!

I just feel very overwhelmed as it is such a HUGE decision and obviously you want to get it right.

Hi - it is very very overwhelming. I think you should go visit all personally. I can only speak from my experience so it’s what I’m going to share with you. I have 3 kids and they are all in private school but not all will be going to the same school. I have one in secondary and 2 in primary. They are 12,10 and 9.
My eldest is very sure of what he wants to do (same as his dad) he’s strong at maths and everything that is black and white, he also likes sports (which we encourage) but he’s not particularly outstanding he just enjoys it. So we looked for a private school that had a strong curriculum and ultimately where their students would leave secondary into good universities but also had sporty extra curriculars
my middle child is very similar to me eldest so she will be going to the same school - she likes science more than maths but again she is aiming for the same university as her dad.
my youngest - we are looking for a different school - he loves sports and is very good and whilst he gets good grades - he’s not as academic as his siblings - which is why we decided that an environment that is mainly academic would not be a good fit for him.
you get a feel for the schools and so do the kids and their excitement (or lack of) will help you make a decision for them

Neither DH or I went to private school and we had only 1 friend with an older child in the independent sector. We made a decision to explore the option of private secondary when DD was 8 to allow ourselves time to think about it, and save!

There weren't a large number of independent schools in our area (4 that were theoretically commutable) and we ruled one out pretty much straight away due to its reputation as an academic hot house. We visited the other 3 and ruled another one out (didn't get a vibe there) and then proceeded over the next year or two to attend every open day at the other two schools. We liked both of them, as did DD, so we decided to apply to both and see where things lay. DD passed the exams for both and was offered a place at each school so we had a long chat about it all with her and opted for the one with slightly lower (but still great) academic results but a great reputation for art, music and sport as well as an award winning pastoral programme.

Ultimately I would say visit as much as you can, not just on open days - contact and ask for a tour during a normal school day. Get your name down as soon as you can with Admissions - some schools (like ours) will prioritise places according to how long your name has been down if they have more children passing the entrance tests than places.

It's only been a week, but DD is loving it so far and her younger brother is already begging to be allowed to go before Y7 - not in the budget I'm afraid!

It seems totally overwhelming when you start looking, especially if you don't know anyone having done it before you.

If you wanted to narrow it down so you don't have to visit all10, then I think the only reason to not attend a school without visiting it is because A) fees B) commute. So maybe consider if there are any schools you could eliminate that way.

Otherwise, I think you should visit as many as you can. It's the only way to go about choosing which one is best and which ones you don't like.

Not knowing the specifics, I would also recommend not discounting the 'academic' options on the basis that you might not get in. If you visit and you love it, then it is worth applying. Especially for a 4+ assessment, which are not usually testing them academically but looking for soft skills, personality types etc. Just make sure that you apply also for schools that are non-selective so that you have a back-up school that you are happy to go to if you are unsuccessful elsewhere.

Lastly, everyone is different but these were the criteria I used to select the schools we applied to:

• distance from home/commute
• Curriculum: is it rigorous to the level I would like, does it cover subjects I find to be important and time spent on them reflective of that, does it align with my values (tip! read the policy on the website where they usually outline subjects taught, time spent on them per week, ethos or religious values taught etc etc)
• Co-curriculars offered: value placed and time spent on sport, music, art, drama. variety of after school clubs offered which would be interesting for my child
• Facilities: doesn't need to be flashy, but do they have what they need to teach with and is the right space available during breaks for my child to relax or play
• Class size: my son went to a school with small class size because he was very young and shy when he started. My daughter I was fine with a bigger class size because she is older and very confident. So very personal to you.
• Ownership and school stability: is the school owned by private equity, or private, or trust. Varied viewpoints on what is best but it is useful to know as if it is PE than they often have oversight on the school, can be good or bad. Privately owned may be more susceptible to closure if it is small school, but upside is they have autonomy.
• Results/leavers destinations: at primary it's mainly leavers destinations, and making sure they are sending children on to secondaries that you would consider. In my opinion, not top criteria for me as the results can be deceiving

Lastly, and probably most important is your gut feeling. Do you love it, and can you see your child going there. Good luck!

Thank you so so much for such an in depth answer. It is private secondaries that we are looking at, but i'm sure everything you have said still applies. I will be making notes of all these points!
x

We were in the same situation with going independent for secondary having no experience of it before

We were very clear with our 'wish' list and just went with that in mind to all open days etc. Same as with choosing any school. Ultimately went with our gut feeling and so far proven to be right.

Would definitely recommend you do a deep dive into finances eg reserves. VAT is having a devastating impact on the sector and I would want to know the school was viable long term.

Drill down into fees eg annual rises, amount of VAT applied, extras and what's included/not included.

You could look at The Times Good Schools Guide. Or The Tatler schools list.

But I'd narrow down to the four you get to easily. Under 30 mins ideally, assuming non boarding.

I would also suggest talking to existing parents at your shortlisted schools. You can always find a friend of a friend whose child goes there. But please be aware to not be too influenced by any 1 person’s opinion as your journey might not be the same. But getting good feedback from a couple of parents is a good sense check.

I am also wondering which of these schools are very difficult to get into or not .. and if that’s changed since VAT etc added.

I do not wish to put my dc through too many applications, but also don’t wish to sell them short if you see what I mean!

It would be massively helpful if there were statistics somewhere which stated how many spaces available in each school and likely no of applicants being up against. It would be hard if dc get their heart set on a specific school, but then rejected. I guess that’s life, but still - I’d rather avoid it.