Hmmm - 'interesting' PTA experience

[Bigmouthstrikesagain]

I went to a PTA meeting a couple of weeks ago - the first one I have attended (my son is in yr 1). I was early so had a nice chat with the head but once the 'regulars' arrived I was left to my own devices and no one aside from the lady next to me introduced themselves (I knew a couple of others also sitting near me but that was it). The entire meeting my presence was not officially acknowledged by the chair or secretary.

It last for a couple of hours and was mainly moaning about how no one helped at the events and no one new ccould be bothered to get involved. A bunch of jaded PTA'ers self-congratulating and whining it was truly uninspiring! I wonder why they have trouble getting people to help! The funniest thing was a long anecdote about how one woman when she asked a parent for help was told 'oh I can't but how much do you want me to give you?' (the parent then donated £50 so she didn't have man the tombola or whatever. Imo that would be a result! money for the school fund, but it is as if the people at this meeting live in some fantasy world where putting on funruns are vital to the economy or something! Freaky...

Or am I the one missing something? Anyway I am donating an hour for the tombola and I will attend the next meeting - if only to see if I get treated like the Elephant in the room again! Am I wasting my time?

Get some other newish Mums to go with you next time and get ready to stage a coup it sounds as if they need one.

Thanks mummytime - I agree - actually there are newish mums who are attending and I feel will be going for the 'top jobs' next term - which is why I am not giving up on it entirely - but is this what happens to you after 4 thankless years in the PTA?????

Get in early if you really want a "top job". They might do jobs for the girls and decide well in advance.

I HATE PTAs like yours though. The best advice I can give you is to actually speak up in the meetings.

Ime, if you speak up you get ignored anyway!

I intend to be a bit more pushy at the next meeting put my oar in etc. this last meeting I was so taken aback by the blatent ignoring of my presence that I didn't speak up - and I also wanted to observe and understand how the PTA worked before I spoke.

Now I will come prepared, but honestly anyone sane would have been put off completely!

I have ambitions for Gov'ner next term Squeaver so they are welcome to the PTA top jobs - but thanks for the tip - not that I can assume success in Guv'ship of course.

Sounds like the one at our old school - I wanted to join and contribute but I had experience of being treated like a pile of poo by PTA memeber when I volunteered for an event - never again! We had people trying to break with the negativity but they were shot down in flames everytime they spoke...and yet they constantly moan that no one helps. Life's too short - pass the monthly direct debit please!

Well that is what I am afraid of ICFGN! Maybe I will propose a 'protection money' scheme at the next meeting to ask parents for £20 + at the start of each term and therefore be released from any obligation to 'help out' bet that will impress 'em!

Unfortunately for me despite my desire to help out I can't stand funrun's, fete's and Christmas balls - I can only hope there will be something I can enjoy as well as getting the warm and fuzzy's from helping the school funds.

I would suggest you stand up and say someting like:
Hi, I'd like to introduce myself, I'm (name) and I was here at the last meeting too. I have to say I'm really trying to give this a go, but I found the last meeting really negative and I think you should perhaps try to focus on the positives a bit more. After all you have (number) people here all wanting to help and willing to give up their time. Also you need people spending their money and donating, not just running stalls, any and all support should be welcomed, and if people can't do more then we shouldn't hassle them which leaves them fleeing in terror of ever being asked again.
If you want to encourage more you have to understand that not everyone can give time, but if someone does make the effort to come along to a meeting or get involed perhaps it would help if we could make them a little more welcome.

Then you sit down, either to stunned silence or a room full of fed up PTA'ers. Oh wait they're already fed up, so no change there then! WHat have you got to loose?

Oh and suggest a round robin type email. We never get very many coming to our meetings, as too many parents work and/or have siblings in tow. But we do have lots that want to help out in different ways and just can't or won't come to meetings.
Some who may only want to run a stall and not be involved in any planning, and others who have loads of good ideas but no time or inclination to put them into practise.

I had one lady I asked if she could help and she made excuses and I said that was fine I completely understood. Never asked her again. But the following year she came back and volunteered to help on a stall but said she didn't want to get involved. I told her that was great and not to worry, she was under no pressure to do anything more and all t he planning and organising was already sorted anyhow. She looked so relieved. And yes she turned up to help and she's volunteered to help again.

You just have to get your committee to accept that all help, no matter how small or of what kind is great and to accept and appreciate it. Once they stop being so negative they'll find it so much easier. Course its easier said than done...