Nail Varnish on Primary school girls.

[thatbuzzingnoise]

DD is in reception and in the last month has been asking to wear nail varnish. I have a few bottles but I can't remember the last time (years in fact) when I have worn it. She keeps saying that certain girls wear it to school. For me it is a not over my dead body issue esp. since I teach(secondary).

If this is indeed so, AIBU to expect the school to put their foot down about it. I am planning to make inquiries via the childminder this week and if so, I'm planning to discuss it with school.

Sorry, have I read this right? We have people asking if it's OK for a 5 year old to wear nail varnish to school?
And people saying, "oh yeah, why not? Sure schools won't mind."

Is this for real?

It's banned at our school - but I think this is a big fuss over nothing. If you don't want your child to wear nail varnish then say no & don't put it on....grow some balls!

My 4yo DS has some on her toes atm.....the other girls in her class told her off when they saw thmem when they did PE.

I would have painted 7yo DS's toe nails at the same time, but DH said it wasn't what boys do, and put him off the idea.

No, we have people asking (effectively) "should I stick my nose in and make an official complaint to the school about someone else's 5 year old wearing nail varnish to school?". And people saying "No, butt out and mind your own business rather than getting het up about what other people allow or don't allow their children to put on their fingernails."

My dd sees me wearing nail varnish and loves having hers done too. She has been told that it's not allowed in school (reception) so we stick to the holidays and weekends, it usually comes off on it's own after a day or so anyway but I have on occasion forgotten and she's been to school with it still on. I don't see the harm in it myself and disagree that it's part of the sexualisation of children, she's just wanting to copy me just like they do when they play dress up or play mummy with her dolls. On the other hand I don't allow her to wear heels like one or two of the other girls her age and she's asked to get her ears pierced which I won't allow yet. If you don't want her to have nail varnish then just say no, there's probably going to be lots of things in future that her peers will do that you won't allow her to do but you can't do anything about them. She will have to learn that.

No I wasn't going to stick my nose in and make an official complaint about someone else's chid wearing nail varnish.

Well that is obviously your interpretation of what I wrote. I do not and never intend to raise other people's children for them.

What I was asking was if the school's policy state that make up (I consider nail varnish makeup) should not be worn then shouldn't the school enforce the policy?

Yes, but you didn't mention makeup policies until your third post. On the face of it you OP just said that if it was true that some girls were wearing nail varnish to school you were "planning to discuss it with school" because you "expected them to put their foot down". And most of the subsequent posts, as is the Way Of Mumsnet, have been responding to the OP. So in terms of summarising what was going on in the thread I think I captured it reasonably well even if that wasn't what you meant.

I don't consider nail varnish makeup. I don't think most policies would consider it makeup either, as whenever I've seen a relevant policy the two have been covered separately. You don't know if the school has a makeup policy. You don't know if it has a nail varnish policy. If you just mean that you're going to ask the school what its policy on nail varnish is then you hardly need to start an AIBU thread about it (yes, not in AIBU section but you asked the question).

"What I was asking was if the school's policy state that make up (I consider nail varnish makeup) should not be worn then shouldn't the school enforce the policy?"

Are you seriously considering confronting the school for not enforcing one of their rules? How do you see that as not "stick my nose in and make an official complaint about someone else's chid wearing nail varnish"

Becuase to highlight that the policy is not being enforced you do have to mention that someone else's child is wearing it.

This whole pre-sexualisation of children crap really winds me up. If you don't want your child in a mini skirt, bikini, wearing make up, high heels then bloody well parent and say no and butt out of other parent's choices!

I have the rule for my 7yr old charge that it is clear or pale pale pale pink on fingers and nothing dark on toes.
She knows that dark colours are for grown ups and little girls should not have bright red fingernails (I think it is a bit skanky looking). SHe is happy with that reasoning.

I am sorry I didn't cover all eventualities in my OP. Somehow in a face to face conversation we can excuse people for this but not so on MN.

I would not be complaining about anyone's kid because I would not mention names.

I am sure some kids in other classes besides reception are wearing varnish and make up too so I would expect that the school remind all parents of the school policy.

By parents pointing out that they expect the policies to be adhered to they are also supporting the school, imo.

I would not be pointing it out necessarily because I have a bee in my bonnet about it. I really don't care about it for other people's kids. I do care that the school remind people about it's policies. At some point, probably early in the next school year, it could go out as a reminder in teh newsletter, for example.

Off me soapbox and onto my lunchbox.

"Becuase to highlight that the policy is not being enforced you do have to mention that someone else's child is wearing "

No you don't. Teachers have eyes too, you know.

I don't think there's anything wrong with a 4yo wearing nail varnish now and again but wouldn't let my DCs wear it at school, even if it weren't banned.

I think I'd rather it was banned, but I'm quite fussy about uniform etc - it just looks better when they all look smart!

I can't really believe anyone could summon up the energy to make a fuss about this. Dd is 4 and often has painted finger and toe nails, any colour that takes her fancy. It's fun and she likes it.

No complaint from school at all. Then again, she had henna patterns done on her hands at school last week and they take ages to fade. Fortunately it's a school where the kids do loads of interesting things, enjoy themselves and manage to learn without any rigorous enforcement of uniform or make-up policies. It is perfectly possible, you know.

I've never minded DD wearing it, and she has from being about 3. She currently has purple fingermails and multi coloured toenails. School have never said anything.

DD(5) has painted toenails but I don't let her have her fingernails painted at school. She loves it and it is something we do together.

Agree with sari. My girls have always loved playing with nail polish and sometimes even makeup. I don't mind at all. They even have their own little bag each.

It's no big deal. There doesn't seem to be any peer pressure at school about it that I've noticed. They usually take it off anyway for school although I don't think the teachers mind either way.

Wow sari what fun to have henna patterns done. I want one!

what a fuss!

I wore toe nail varnish on and off for as long as I can remember (must have been from about 3)

If Ds wants me to paint his toe nails too then I will, I don't think that really counts as sending him to nursery in make up! I'd think that someone complaining that a 'no make up ' policy wasn't being enforced because some kids had painted nails was a right ninny! its hardly akin to blusher and mascara and lipstick!

Nail varnish is something I've never really considered which surprises me as I'm a good, old-fashioned strict teacher who expects rules to be upheld. However, I currently teach in a school where there is no uniform beyond the requirement for children to have their shoulders covered in summer, no flip-flops (or flippy floppy sandals with only decorative heel straps!) and no rude words on clothing.

My own 5-year-old DD is currently sporting nail varnish in a particularly lurid shade of red because her friend's mum did it for them both when she went there for tea the other day. It was a bit of fun and doesn't prevent her from joining in with any of her usual messy, sticky playing. If it did maybe I'd insist on it being removed before school the next day.

When teaching I do have a thing about makeup, including glittery lip gloss because it children are faffing about with lip stuffs instead of concentrating, or wanting to pop out to the loo to apply some more then it is affecting their learning but quite possibly, also their playing. I imagine if I was teaching a child who spent the entire tme inspecting/protecting their painted nails then I'd have a word with that child's parents and ask that s/he come to school with unpainted nails. If I taught somewhere that it was school policy not to allow nail polish then I'd do whatever the policy required of me e.g. speak to parents, lend them remover (depending upon child's age), amputate their fingers etc.etc.

OP, if it's against the school rules to wear nail polish then I think it makes most sense for you to simply tell your child that it is against school rules and that you believe rules are important. It might also be worth discussing with her how she would be able to tell if a child had been told off for wearing nail polish - would their necessarily be a physical sign? How does she know that the nail polish wearers haven't all been told off and made to miss play time for breaking a rule? If you do feel you want to bring it up with the Head then I think you should take your DD along too and adopt a, "DD doesn't understand why nail polish isn't allowed at school... I've explained that Headteachers have very good reasons for things so she can come and ask you as my reasons aren't acceptable!". Let the Head explain to her why it matters and let your DD be the one who tells on the 5-year-olds whose parents haven't cottoned on to that particular rule.

Why spoil it for everyone else? If you don't want your child to wear it that's fine, but i may still want my daughter to!

Hi I am looking advise.

My six year old smuggled nail polish into school and at lunch took a friend to the toilets to paint each others nails. Accidentally dropped the nail polish and panicked wiped it and unfortunately made it worse.

The principal got involved took her to the office told her off called her dad made him come to the school with nail polish remover. Took her out class to show her dad what she done wrong.

I'm sorry but I think this is so wrong on the schools part. what do you think

@ThisWildMintCrab you should start your own separate thread to ask that, this is a discussion from 14 years ago! People won't read through it to see your question they'll just reply to the original post.

Ha, this reminds me of how long I've been here!